sunnykerr

Clover, whatever you do, don't see it as a relapse. Being sad is a normal emotion. Feeling overwhelmed, especially when dealing with a new job, is also normal. Be patient with yourself.

reason to believe

Ugh, I feel so unmotivated to do anything lately. Maybe it’s just cause I’ve been sick too long quick after one other illness. Plus thinking I’ll be judged by my work absences due to these dumb viruses I’ve been getting.

Plus my lower back hurts low key, but the pain is still there making me wonder what’s causing this and if it will get worse.

sunnykerr

I think you're onto something about your physical health affecting your mental health. I mean, I know that's always the case for me.

I think you'll be fine. If your bosses don't understand that people get sick in winter, then you're better off finding a job somewhere else. I'm sure it won't feel that way, but I do feel it's true.

There You'll Be

^ what she said, about your work.

I'm the same way, when I don't feel well. Nothing motivates me then. Especially one after another, Leanne.

I realized Marsha was the only person I was hanging out with here. My mood was hypersensitive to hers, and how she treated me. She's not a very happy person, so you can guess how that's gone.

I'm spending most of my time keeping to myself, and hanging with everyone else around here. It's like...only what I think matters to me. ?

sunnykerr

I'm really proud of you, Kim, for noticing how your friendship with Marsha was affecting you and taking steps to make sure you are doing well. It couldn't have been easy, but you did it.

Meliana

Yes well done, Kim!

I've actually felt happy for the past week. The CBT is giving me techniques for dealing with those self critical thoughts, which would send me into a downward spiral, so things are really improving right now.

sunnykerr

That's awesome, Claire! And good on you, because all therapy can do is suggest things. You're the one doing the work and taking solutions onboard.

reason to believe

I’m so glad to hear that, Claire!

I’m currently trying not to dwell so much on the fact that almost every interaction I’ve had with anyone in my life has moments were I’m embarrassed by whatever I said or acted like with them.

Meliana

That's totally it, Leanne. I will always find something awful to focus on which other people probably haven't even noticed. The key is to train yourself to focus on the good things and to not be looking for bad things which are probably in your own head anyway. Try this book: Overcoming Low Self-Esteem by Melanie Fennell. I think it could help you.

Thanks Sunny. It seems like I'm coming to the end of my therapy now. The idea is I become my own therapist!

sunnykerr

Claire, I think that becoming your own therapy is a logical extension of CBT. I'm just impressed at your success with it. Not that I think you shouldn't have succeeded. It is impressive, that's all.

Having said that, I want you to know that it's okay if your success is a moment-to-moment thing, right? The objective is improvement on the whole. No one is ever happy all the time. It's okay if you hit a harder patch. You'll overcome it.

That's what's impressive about your progress, you know? Whatever happens next, you'll be okay.

reason to believe

Thanks for the book recommend, Claire!


Glad you can move on your own to try your CBT skills now!

sunnykerr

It's a good suggestion for everyone.

Meliana

There's a whole series of 'Overcoming' books. Worth checking out.

sunnykerr

Good to know. I've been reading Mindfulness books and they're pretty awesome.

There You'll Be

Thank you Sunny. That means a lot coming from you. I am sad for your weekend headaches. It's not fair, and even though we both know life isn't fair, I'd like to change that suffering away. Are you okay?

Claire, I'm so happy for you. You've done so much for your healing. I'm really proud of you. I know where you started, and just It is enough that it works more than when you didn't have the tools for before.

Leanne, give yourself some slack. I don't know anyone who doesn't have those moments, or wonder if life would be different if those things hadn't happened. Is that the birth control making a big enough difference to be worth it?

I got more hurt from that fall, hitting my head, than I thought. I don't know why I have a falling habit, for over a year now, and probably beyond. I mean, when you reach a certain age does your balance disappear?

It scares me, and that makes me sad, and angry.