James26

I have a feeling that the writers have some sort of future planned for these two, seeing as they're still in a story line together. I think that the break-up could be some sort of road bump. I imagine that they'll have a friendly ending if they don't get back together.

Barstool Prophet

I totally forgot about that.

Mayberry

^ Me too. Shows you how important their senior year came off.

Previously on 90210....Ade bedded a handsome mistake, Annie did the same for Dixon's sake, and Liam had all the Navid he could take.

Jaws had a sex change and is now a fetching blonde girl in the great blue ocean. This of course scares Liam because he thinks Lady Jaws walked across the beach, came to the bar for a brewski, and will now proceed to chomp his abs off, which are insured for more than the amount Annie got from Patrick. Liam wakes from his nightmare after turning out his Tinkerbell nightlight. He can't believe Jaws found his bedroom, you know the only one at the bar? But Liam breathes a sigh of relief. Instead of a shark, it's a shrimp named Navid. What happened to Liam's promise that he would beat the living pulp out of Navid? I should've known this show would wuss out because we're talking about a dummy and a wuss here, and no, sometimes I don't know which is which. Navid brought Liam back the money he put into the bar, three bucks and a two-headed Lincoln penny. Liam's mad that he can't buy a snowglobe with the returned money. He's planning on cracking it and sprinkling it around his porch so he can have a white Christmas. Navid says he's not sweeping that off the floor. Liam says he can't forgive and forget that comment, which means he will in 90210-land. But Navid's gotta leave if he can't come up with a solution. He plans to invite Ade and/or Dixon over, pretend the snow is fake blow, and have them snort it up. It's not like they have a steady job. Oh wait. He doesn't either. Ha!

Dixon heard Navid's plan, and makes some contracts he copied from Annie's desktop. He just substituted charity with "record company". This is what happens when Dixon can't fit it all on an Etch a Sketch. Ade looks bored until Dixon mentions how great she is. She tries to play it off by saying she has Cheerios in her teeth but then starts to sing breakfast cereal theme songs while Dixon holds a camera up to their mouths. Ade goes back to her Trix until Dixon drops Boo-Tay's name. Silly Adrianna. Dix is for monogamy. Adrianna also comes up with some lame company names: Cheater Peter Pumpkin Eater Records, Everybody Loves Ade Records, 90210 Is The Platform For My Music Career Records. Ade says that they don't need anybody's help, but puts Billy Ray on speed dial. If she breaks Dixon's achy breaky heart, she can blackmail BR with those pictures of him kissing Liam's billboard.

Carmen Exsextra is teaching Silver how to be sexy without hitting on your friends. Silver totally misses the point and asks what Carmen is doing later. Carmen says she's flattered but still gets texts from college guys who were on Singled Out waiting for her marriages to fail. Silver asks what Dennis Rodman is doing later. She also explains how dancing has made her feel better about her health, which is actually pretty nice. But not nice enough to entice Carmen. So I was basically talking to you for nothing, sighs Silver. Silver goes to see if the bouncer feels like "talking" but will void that if he can't reach his leg up to his ear like Carmen.

Annie scrunged up her yearbook for Naomi. Naomi just wanted to look at her Most Popular picture, with Ade as Best Teen Mom, Liam as Best Undercover Intelligence, Silver as Best Ex-Girlfriend/Friend, Navid as Most Annoyingly Talkative, Max as Most Likely To Succeed, Ivy as Most Likely To Disappear, Teddy as Best Dressed, Dixon as Best Smile, and Annie as Most Likely To Do a Somersault for A Teddy Bear Drive.
Naomi's wearing Dixon's shirt. Since she's married now, that's the closest they'll get to sex. I like this development very much. I bet it smells like knocked over sandcastles since Silver knocked that on Dixon pretty hard. The Homecoming Divas are interested in making Naomi a member which means they found out she's got dough. Annie will be ignored since she used to be poor. Max comes downstairs because he heard Naomi's wearing Dixon's shirt. Well, I'll wear my shirt that a mannequin gave me, challenges Max. He's not going to meet with the Divas unless she ditches Dixon's tee. Nope, says Naomi. Max is teed off. He'll rip that shirt off himself and get down to business. But first he's got a merger with Bryce, who's making a mystery merger.
Annie offers to get the door like a good servant, but Naomi wants Max to work off his anger so he answers. Mrs. Gwen Thompson arrives, basically Denise Richards with a new purse. I'm dubbing her Win-Win because it was a win-win when she left Charlie Sheen and he provided us with hilarious quotes. #Winning! Naomi pours Win-Win champagne, calling for a toast to Sheen for pulling his act together. Naomi pulls the champagne glass away from Annie. Annie only gets ginger ale on weekdays. Naomi slams back a taste after Win-Win reveals Naomi is competing with Felicity Hathaway, Anne Hathaway's cousin who travelled to college in New York just for some boy. Naomi can't beat that but she can beat someone up. Her chance will be at the good ol' West Bev reunion/football rally provided she bring her friends with her. It's gonna be bangin' especially with Silver around. That's fine and dandy, figures Naomi. Half of them don't work and the other half can be the entertainment. Ginger ale for all! Annie does a somersault after imbibing half a gallon.

Cheeeeese, says the class of West Bev seniors that barely spent any time in class. Pizza, adds Liam, looking around for a delivery truck. Dixon thinks Ade's neck is a snack while Naomi decides to dump the tree dedication ceremony. What do they need tree dedications for? Doesn't money grow on trees? In your world they do, says Silver. Now I'm going to find some barely legal seniors who are into brunettes! Navid mentions that he was engaged to Ade. Nobody remembers that he was engaged to a hot girl, just like the writers until this episode. Liam moves away from Navid because he wants to plan a pizza party. Can't a model just get some cheese without smiling? Even Teddy can't stand to be around Navid. He's upset he didn't go to the Navade bachelor party and Ethan did. Navid will spend the rest of the day tracking down Ethan, the one guy he hasn't offended. He's got a tape of Ethan picking his nose to show somebody if Ethan won't be his BFF.

Liam complains that Naomi blocked his way to Domino's. I was going to play Domino's there. The bodyguard, aka Fatal Distraction, says Liam should chill and that she shanked the photographer that snapped him. Whatever. I bet she paid that dude off. A truckload of teenagers rush to Liam. They have invites for him to attend their slumber AND pizza parties. You can have both, asks Liam. Cool beans! I like pineapple on my pizza so I hope one of these girls lives in Hawaii!

Annie thinks they're on vacation and videotapes Adrianna. She asks what Ade has done since high school. Steal, cheat, lie, almost fly off a cliff, and not graduate, says Adrianna. Basically what half of the Hollywood teens do. Annie says she graduated two years ago. Adrianna said she ate a muffin two years ago and now she performs at the Hollywood Bowl. Booyah! Dixon comes over to see if his sister has stopped whining. No? Okay, time to schmooze then. Suddenly, the only guest star to inherit Annie's peppy genes appears! Cousin Emily. Yesssss, LOVE Cousin Emily. She has more energy than a manic puppy has in its paw. She's back to blonde, and true to form, makes Annie question her existence on the planet with about five sentences. Give this girl all the Emmys, you know the Emmys Annie wants? Who cares if she went to West Bev for a month? She almost got on Broadway, ya'll. I bet it was Legally Blonde, Bring It On, or 10 Things I LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE About You. She also has a blog where she trashes Kansas cousins with the made-up names of Nixon and Frannie. Annie wants to kill herself. Frannie is taller than her. Shoooot.
If that's not enough, Jasper's back with a big ol' envelope. Annie automatically believes it's the pay stubs from Patrick's checks. Come on now. How many blasts from the past are going to make her feel bad about herself? She should expect an angry Rhonda in her next drama class! Emily pays no attention to Annie's plight and checks how big her Mentos is on her tongue.

Seddy's bouncing balls off the roof towards unsuspecting alums. They're aiming them at Annie...yes, it's that kind of day for Ms. Wilson. Silver also wants to hit a buff sophomore named Biff. She tells Teddy that if he hits him, he'll receive sixty points. Teddy tells her that him and Shane are OVAH. Good. Shane was a dud. Actually, he was worse than a dud. He was a snarky dud. Teddy says he can't go back to D.C. without an L.A. souvenir for Shane, but definitely won't go back if Silver's not taking excellent care of the sperm. Silver says she just has to tell the sperm what to do and it's done. Teddy finally bops Biff with a ball. They high-five each other. Beaning sophomores is the best sport ever. Silver goes to drag Biff to a broom closet where she previously banged Dixon.

Speaking of bangin', Win-Win is hoping Naomi's speech will be off the hook, yo. Max has returned to support his wife and glower at the jocks since he scored the prom queen. Naomi unveils a new building, the Fashion-Science Building. This is where Max will hold business meetings with other mannequins. But shocker, somebody dropped the B-bomb on the design picture. Was it Felicity? Charlie Sheen? Ethan, for that slap and not being invited? No, it has to have been Allergy, who fell for Max after going undercover as a junior to listen to Max's valedictorian speech. Naomi's about to put a microphone through some alum skulls!

Silver and Ade are playing catch. They're pretending the ball is Navid, who they passed around senior year until he asked Silver to tie his shoes and Ade left him alone. Navid has moved on to pom-pom and does a handstand to show his Cookie Monster underwear. West Bev blue, keeping it classy! Dixon's grossed out and thanks the truck for killing his cheerleader chances. Navid has also ruined pom-poms for Liam. It's a shame because they were such peaceful fluffy animals. The boys all do a cheer. Be possessive, shouts Navid, doing a split. If your girl leaves, B-E possessive. A-B-C-D-E-F-G, recites Liam, lifting a leg. If you know the rest, please text it to me. You and me baby ain't nothing but mammals, cheers Max. So once my wife wins, we'll do it like they do it on the Discovery Channel! The girls scream, anything for fifteen miliseconds of fame!

Felicity flew direct from New York to come bother Naomi. This must be where you go when your show's been cancelled for over ten years. ;( Naomi can't believe Felicity dropped her college plans for a boy, but Win-Win hates college since Charlie Sheen blocked her speaking tour. Naomi better learn to play dirty or she can kiss the Homecoming Diva Club good-bye.
Max tries to get the crowd to do a wave . Dixon cackles at the four people doing it, especially Navid who flashed some panty.

Jasper hands Annie some ginger ale. Because they dated, he knows she has to recharge her insides with caffeine and/or sugar. Jasper wants to meet and discuss Lannie. He found out they had two failed proposals. What up with that? Annie chugs the ginger ale instead of replying. Then she mentions how he set Liam's boat on fire. Why didn't you just spit some ginger ale on the flames, questions Jasper. Oh no he didn't. I agree with Jasper tbh. Liam pounded Jasper's body like an obnoxious pillow and it's not like Lannie didn't get one day of sailing in before the Towering Inferno. Jasper says he must speak with Liam, and that there's fifty-cent ginger ale in a crackhouse downtown. What does that mean, yells Annie. Am I going to have to go on a drug bust for cheap Seagram's?

Ooops, Naomi forgot to block Felicity on the field. Guess she's gotta return to New York in traction while Ben waters the apartment plants. Anne Hathaway is victorious. Anne Hathaway is always victorious. Naomi will take over her banquet, which means it'll be ten times sexier. Silver and Ade giggle, trading grass stain stories. Silver socked about eight men, who want her number. Ade sang to everybody, with the other team screaming and running for the hills. The West Bev team is better than the Fab Five gymnastic girls.

Unlike Navid, Silver knows how to tie a proper shoe knot and slips off her kleats. Her post-game funk attracts the closest gay man in the vicinity. Victoria Justice's BoyToy/Shane is searching for Teddy, That souvenir ain't gonna buy itself. Shane didn't break up with Teddy, not until he gets that keyring. Silver's surprised as punch. When is Teddy going to get a keyring for her and their imaginary kid?

Teddy's avoiding his Vegas spouse by looking after Liam. You can't trust Liam when he unscrews a bottle. He might think the cap is Lifesaver candy, and they'll be in the ER in no time. The burnw up bar is boring without Adrianna or Annie telling Liam not to staple stuff to wires. Teddy brings up Navid, promising that he will buy Liam that snowglobe. A principal wants to name a wing after this guy? Liam would only get lost there and wonder why the people around him are passing him with books. I remember when he won Honorable Mention in that essay contest. Just goes to show you'll be more honored if you film a hack movie than place in a writing competition. Liam's call is not from the principal however. It's his phone message to the police. I broke my balcony and oh yeah, somebody went splat. Oh wait, never mind. She disappeared without a magician. Isn't that neato? Teddy laughs. This is his new favorite message. Liam asks if Teddy wants half the bottlecap.

Taio Cruz is performing for a bunch of bunnies. He's the magician who made Hit and Run vanish. Oh, they're at the Playboy Mansion. Where's Hef? Hitting on any girl that can't vote? Naomi avoids Hef by praising herself in the third person. It's been about twenty minutes of not doing it so she's due. Max's merger is going through. Finally he can explain to the world what fashion-science means! Max is sad he'll miss the lingerie show. Naomi's bras are long time chums. They'll work out their own reunion later.

After introducing herself to all the bunnies, Silver follows her tracking signal to Teddy. She wants Teddy to converse with Dud Hubby or she's taking Shane to her room for the night. Those are her "best friend rights". Teddy's gotta shape up or let Shane out for Silver's loving. Why are they badmouthing Tian? This show always has to throw the best ships under the bus so they can prop their mediocre replacement. Ian was the boss, and hello, I needed him and Ozzie for eye candy at the reunion! Teddy's scared of Dud. He got him a five-cent magnet of the Hollywood sign that broke in his pocket. Silver says he has to share his feelings. Sometimes I feel like a nut, replies Teddy. Sometimes I don't. Silver shakes her head. She's certain Navid ate all the nuts cause she chose Teddy's sperm. Time to be fearless and show off her body to her ex-boyfriends before the pretzels are gone too!

Liam found a house where Annie can store her ginger ale. She wants to know what's up. Why is Liam hiding? Did he try to free the merry go round horses again? Mistake sandpaper for a graham cracker? What? He's got a bodyguard to hold his hand on the escalator so what is he crying about? Liam shares that Hit and Run did a flip over his balcony but couldn't stick a landing. She's a sucky athlete and she's dead. Ginger ale can't cure this, says Annie. Liam asks Annie to sign a lease for a gingerbread house. Annie shuts down that idea and informs him that Jasper's hunting for him. I get mean letters, weird messages, and have ex-enemies pop up, notes Liam. Am I Harry Potter? Annie sighs and Liam checks for a lightning bolt scar on his brow.

Dud Hubby is trying Silver's patience. He should be begging her to backrub him by now. That's when Carmen Exsextra reppears. They're doing burlesque. Here's Silver's chance to make Liam/Dixon/Navid/Teddy/Shane/Hef/the pool boy pant for more. Like Taylor, she's fearless, especially if she can show skin!

Dixon figures he should make one business call before he has a workplace to go to, to make it look official. He bugs some unsuspecting alum and puts a video reel together for his boo. That's when he views Boo-Tay kissing Ade who's all up on that. The moment of truth! Adrianna will hump a guy even if his legs aren't moving. Dixon got screwed...or he didn't. Dixon can't believe his eyes. Ade's got four freckles he never knew about!

Naomi introduces Carmen's burlesque clan to a bunch of horndogs and twenty-year olds who want to be Playmates. Adrianna is both so she's the first to wig out. Silver's on the stage with a bunch of peacocks. She is the leader of the peacocks, displaying her feathers with pride. Stroup does look beautiful. But slipping into a nude bodysuit is nothing new for Silver. Navid is hypnotized. Peacocks are now his favorite animal....if they weren't already! Silver finishes her strut and bows before the crowd. Hef will invite Silver to the Playboy mansion Monday and she'll be running it by Thursday. Hef cries boo hoo hoo....

They could've had more guest stars at the party. Might've been fun. What am I saying? We're lucky they found Jasper gasping for breath on the docks and Emily's How To Be Annie Without Sanity blog. Shane doesn't exist in my book so he can get gone at his earliest convenience.

Everybody, gay/straight/male/female/Navid, praises the perfection that is Silver. She catches Teddy whispering to Dud Hubby. Silver grins. Now's her chance!

Adrianna finds Dixon by the waterfall, and asks if they can sing TLC's Waterfalls right now. Silver's spotlight needs to shift a little, okay? Dixon reveals that he found out about Boo-Tay, and he don't like it one bit. Adrianna confesses that she did the deed and says she likes Dixon's hat. That won't do. It's about time, show. I was tired of Dixon looking like a chump. Hopefully this means DixMeg is nigh. Dixon dumps Adrianna. There's only so many missed eggs a man can deal with. Adrianna dives into the waterfall. She will sing slow jams until Hef kicks her out.

The Hoochie Mamas have returned to blow Silver out the water. Win-Win informs a half-clad Naomi that she's close to joining the Homecoming Divas. Naomi's happy until she realizes Annie's not at her post and a psycho is beating up her shoes. Shoe-Hating Psycho reveals herself to be a formerly large teen whose life Naomi ruined. There were other kids in our school, exclaims Naomi. Oh yeah, someone had to vote for me during prom! The girl says Naomi was stuck up and only beautiful at three angles. Naomi feels terrible, letting her into the fashion show. Shame can be solved by a bustier top!

The detectives Lannie track down their perp, Jasper, the single guy who's not checking out the girls' gams. What's in the envelope, demands Liam. Doritos? Fruit Stripe gum? We're gumshoes today, explains Annie. Fess up! Somebody's been chugging that ginger ale, notes Jasper. Turns out that the mystery is that Jasper wrote a screenplay and wants Corporate Idiot to star in it. You know they should invite Jasper back because he's more Dylan than Liam is currently. There's the drug history, writing skills, the shady dad...all Dylan McKay material. Meanwhile I envision Liam wrestling with a Snuggie every night.
The Lannie case is solved. They won't talk until another mysterious stranger threatens Liam's life. Oh, stalker?

Formerly Obese Reese parades around in pink leopard print, but Naomi does one better and goes au natural. Physically perfect Naomi apologizes for being a mean girl. Are we supposed to feel bad for these nameless people as they throw stuff at her? Or her friends for joining in? I didn't. Look, she ain't the first and she won't be the last. I'm all for the mature apology but throwing food an innocent cook prepared is stank. I can only hope the waterfall will be free for Naomi after Ade is done.
It was kind of gratifying to see Annie toss tuna and crackers though. I don't think Naomi lets her out very much.

Teddy says he enjoyed lobbing deviled eggs at Naomi. Good thing Ade wasn't there because she does devilish things like ban eggs. I think Silver's the only girl the two gay guys would walk home. I guess Teddy/Shane made up but I'm glad I didn't have to watch it. After Silver goes in to phone Hef for another private performance, Dud Hubby reveals his surprise that Tilver's having a youngin'. You're too boring to tell, waves off Teddy. I gotta go lob tennis balls and here's your nickel magnet that melted in my back pocket. Shane throws the magnet in a nearby drain. He hates L.A. now. Curse you Hollywood sign! Silver beckons him to her door.

The moonlight is mourning Dixanna, throwing blue on Dixon's face. Ade's packing up her sheet music and lip gloss, the two things she'd grab in an emergency. 911. Dixon's got Ade locked in a contract he FedExed to Quincy Jones. He owns her. Reverse slavery? Unfaithful Records has a pissed off producer and a sex-loving singer. A recipe for hit records! Dixon promises to lock Adrianna in a henhouse for a day if she's ever late.

Naomi comes home to a depressed Max. No lingerie peepfest for Max. But the real reason we're getting sad panda Max is that Bryce kicked Max out of the company by merging with that mannequin. The mannequin fooled Max into trusting him. Since he's such a bad judge of character, they pulled it off. Max blames Naomi.....bad Max. You practically drooled over Bryce. Naomi will always cause mistakes, won't she? She might as well pay to live. She'd probably get better results.


Annie begins a blog by fictionalizing her life as a hooker. Is she writing the new century Pretty Woman? Under that is a list on how to be Annie: 1) Date every brunette man on the show except Navid. 2) Watch out for your brother when he screws up every year. 3) Stay peppy. 4) No, really stay peppy. 5) Never mind. You can't be me unless you're from Kansas.

Hit and Run isn't dead. Surprise! Only nobody is. Lady Jaws rises from the ashes to step out of a pool in a bikini. The magician failed. She didn't go anywhere. Liam better hide in that house with a bat. Of course if she's carrying a pizza or a snowglobe, that dude's done for.

This ep could've done better on the West Bev side of things, but I'm expecting less and less from this show and at least this was entertaining. The powder puff football game was cute, even though I wanted more, and it was a treat to see Jasper and Emily. They were used in believable ways.

Liam's life is a hot mess. He's like a talk show guest that you can't help but watch despite the fabricated drama. I find Lannie more engaging. Part of me does think she's outgrown him but picturing lil' Annie righting Liam's wrongs is far funnier than Silver's latest health crisis.

Speaking of Silver, this was a good plot for her. I just wish every guy in creation wasn't fawning over her in every third episode! Even Shane? Siiigh.

Addixon's veered off the road too far, and I'm loving it. They're a boring couple but they could be formidable enemies. Stay like this and take it far! She pushed Dix to the edge...and the edgier, the better.

B+ for a somewhat charming episode and NEW developments.

Annie loves her ginger ale, Liam receives creepy voice mails, and for Adrianna, the studio's jail! 902100 ways to punish Naomi! Start with murdering her shoes!





PS. I missed Rannie and their slap happy ways though!

Chastidy

brilliant, perfect name.

Brilliant as always May, you never let us down

sweet girl

Thanks for your great review, May!

Please, clear some space in your inbox, I need to send you something.

Mayberry

I cleared some.
Thanks guys. I'm sure I'll have a new nickname for the bodyguard tomorrow.

Forwood4Bamon

I liked most of the episode. I like that we did get some lannie.

Alexa

It was cool seeing old faces but its too bad we didnt see Ian. When Teddy was on the roof and they mentioned Ian I was hoping he would pop up. Seeing Jasper was creepy but it was cool that he apologized and we kinda got closure on that storyline finally. and it was great to see Annie finally writing. <3

Still no mention of Ivy though? Did they ever say what happened to her?

Dixon is such an ass. I can't believe that he told Adrianna he owned her. I mean, Im glad he found out about the cheating but still.

It was also a fun way to bring them back to highschool for the 100th episode. But the second half of the episode was pretty boring.