jediwands

Good!

Are they currently having the meeting?

jediwands

That makes sense. Impressive the only one they are paying for is yours!

secretk

And it explains why people do not like me that much . Our team has worked on say 15 different projects. My boss and the idiot are leading most of them. I am leading one. And it's the one that is product and the customers are paying for .

jediwands

Well, tough. You are getting things done!

secretk

Well they should be pissed at my former boss. He let me do the work for that project and as a result when I suggesting introducing project leads there was no one better than me to lead the project .

jediwands

Haha. They have to know you didn't just get things handed to you. You had to make things happen in order for the success.

secretk

Eh I might have used every chance I got (because my former boss let me) to ensure good relationship with the product manager . However that is still effort and it's something that people should do. Work sometimes is also about relationships. Not in the personal sense, but work wise. You make compromise at some point and people appreciate it so they do it for you too.

jediwands

You were determined and motivated while not stepping on anyone’s toes. No one should dislike you for succcess. Envious? Sure, but not dislike. If anyone dislikes they’re stupid.

secretk

And insecure and unhappy. If I am happy person I would not envy anyone. I would not see the need to do it. It does not matter whether someone has something I don't have. What matters is me feeling OK with what I have.

Apparently my boss wants what I have but he would get it if he changes his attitude. People don't like you just because you tell them so. They like you because of the way you act and treat them.

So today we had a status meeting and we were discussing something and I mentioned something. He argued my point basically. So once the meeting was over my German boss sent an email saying that he disagrees with him and that he prefers my option .

jediwands

Envy has different layers. It really depends on how you use the word envy... if you envy someone for not having to work weekends it's not used in a negative manner or devastating for your personal feelings about yourself. If you envy someone's life from top to bottom while you hate your own, that certainly could be used negatively and hinders personal growth.

It's quite clear the higher ups prefer you to your boss. I would hope your German boss realizes the email, while great for you, will only continue to create some tension between you and your boss since it's basically playing one against the other in the mind of your boss. However, of course he's only stating his firm professional opinion too which needs to be recognized.

That said, it's quite obvious you and your boss will never reach a point where things are less stressful and tense. I really hope by the end of the week they figure out a way to separate you two/the group in general. That really seems like the best decision for everyone involved.

secretk

Agree . We all have envied someone for something, but like you said there is balance. What you said is right on top - if you envy someone so much and you hate yourself so much, it can be used really negative.

That's true . On the other hand I do understand my German boss in the sense that there was huge problem last week. My Bulgarian boss was nowhere to be found and M had to take care about this in the sense of basically finding compromise that works because the system was blocked. We found workaround but we had to deactivate functionality for the customers which you could realize is not a long term solution. After all they were promised this. So my boss suggested basically more sophisticated workaround to minimize the issue to some extent while my German boss wants a proper solution. He wants investigation that explains the cause of the problem and then fixing it. And he is right to want so. Fact that while writing the email he also showed his support for me, but in the end of they day we both want what is best for the company and our customers.

After all our salaries are paid by our customers. We have to consider their wishes. We can't do it every time, but there are for sure cases when we need to do it.

The door was closed the moment he filed the complaint. There is really no going back for me and he realized it yesterday when I refused to talk. That being said I do think that he plans to convince the higher ups to keep the things as they are organizational wise so no split. We will see what will happen by the end of this week.

jediwands

Makes sense.

Why on earth would he want things remaining the same?

secretk

His solution is easier to be done than my suggestion . It's about efforts and tine basically, but again what matters for me are the customers.

jediwands

So he files a complaint against you, then takes it back and wants to move on and act like everything is fine? Talk about all over the place.

I am sure he feels he needs you even though he cannot control or manage you.

secretk

I guess he expects me to forget. It's true that I already had forgotten my emotions, but I have not forgotten my impression and the way he played the things.

It does not matter what he feels. The CTO basically thinks that I am indispensable per my German boss words. It's a moot point what my boss thinks.

We have two big Development teams in our company. The main product is developed by the other team. However few years back they created additional team that deals with the new design and look and feel of the project. So the CTO respects the two team leaders of those teams. In my case I am a key player in both the core product and the new design (that we are doing with the French).

My boss simply does not know my project and he always blames it on the project and how it's done. I don't care. He does not even want to get to know it and then he expects to be more important than me.

Today the CTO sent us the presentation he showed to people that is basically around the product that we have that includes my product and the other one developed by the other two teams. He does not mention any other project my boss or the idiot are leading. He does not care about them enough to promote them.