[secretk]

Originally Posted by The Apt (View Post) Makes sense. Does your best friend understand that you dislike when he goes on and on about emotional things or do you do a good job of just tuning him out? Does he study/understand personality types?

I am not sure that he knows that I dislike it. When he gets into this state he kind of needs to let it out so he does not always pick up if I am interested in this or not.

[secretk]

Originally Posted by The Apt (View Post) I really think it's incredible too and you make an excellent point about genetics. It could be a rarity in my family. We would pick up the most rare type too. Granted, it's a strong psychic/intuitive type but you know what I mean.

It could play a role because for example in my family my mother and I are less sensitive than say my father. It seems like a good mix between genetics and raising.

Definitely. Knowledge is power.

For sure .

[secretk]

Originally Posted by The Apt (View Post)

. This is true for teen INTJs. Mature INTJs know that it's not always in their favor to be that honest so we know how to be diplomatic and lie to people. We also do not feel guilty about doing so. At that point we have developed our Extroverted Thinking and we find it efficient enough to lie to people as long as we get what we want at work for example. We also know that being honest might prolong the conversation and we do not always have the time or the desire to do so.

We still say the truth if we care about the people that are asking us because we believe that the truth will help them. Otherwise we lie because it's easier and faster .

[jediwands]

Originally Posted by secretk (View Post) I am not sure that he knows that I dislike it. When he gets into this state he kind of needs to let it out so he does not always pick up if I am interested in this or not.

Got it.

[jediwands]

Originally Posted by secretk (View Post) It could play a role because for example in my family my mother and I are less sensitive than say my father. It seems like a good mix between genetics and raising. For sure .

Definitely a good mix.

In my family, the ones that are not psychic they are sensors. I know at least three aunts that are definite ISFJs. For sure. Uncles are more extroverts but most of the women as a rule are either introverts/psychics or introverts/sensors.

[jediwands]

Originally Posted by secretk (View Post) . This is true for teen INTJs. Mature INTJs know that it's not always in their favor to be that honest so we know how to be diplomatic and lie to people. We also do not feel guilty about doing so. At that point we have developed our Extroverted Thinking and we find it efficient enough to lie to people as long as we get what we want at work for example. We also know that being honest might prolong the conversation and we do not always have the time or the desire to do so. We still say the truth if we care about the people that are asking us because we believe that the truth will help them. Otherwise we lie because it's easier and faster .

LOL Makes sense and I can see how this might be different if you're at work versus personal life too.

[secretk]

Originally Posted by The Apt (View Post) Definitely a good mix. In my family, the ones that are not psychic they are sensors. I know at least three aunts that are definite ISFJs. For sure. Uncles are more extroverts but most of the women as a rule are either introverts/psychics or introverts/sensors.

So would you say that for the most part in your family the women are Introverts and the men are the Extroverts?

With my parents I can't determine. I know that my father used to be quite the Extrovert when he was young, but now he is not. My mother now is more Extrovert than him, but she is also now less Extrovert than she used to when she was younger.

[secretk]

Originally Posted by The Apt (View Post) LOL Makes sense and I can see how this might be different if you're at work versus personal life too.

. The goals are different at work . I don't do anything without a reason. Even the smallest comment directed at someone is on purpose. I always have plans and they are mostly in my head and people are not privy to them. And the ones that are know the rough idea, not every little detail that might seem random, but is actually not.

[jediwands]

Originally Posted by secretk (View Post) So would you say that for the most part in your family the women are Introverts and the men are the Extroverts? With my parents I can't determine. I know that my father used to be quite the Extrovert when he was young, but now he is not. My mother now is more Extrovert than him, but she is also now less Extrovert than she used to when she was younger.

Yes, definitely, the vast majority of women are introverts, on both sides of the family actually. Pretty incredible. While just as many men on both sides are extroverts.

I guess introversion and extroversion can change over time. Well, usually it's extroverts become more introverted. It's not usual for introverts to become more extroverted as you get older you would think.

[jediwands]

Originally Posted by secretk (View Post) . The goals are different at work . I don't do anything without a reason. Even the smallest comment directed at someone is on purpose. I always have plans and they are mostly in my head and people are not privy to them. And the ones that are know the rough idea, not every little detail that might seem random, but is actually not.

Incredible! I admire how logical you have been. Like, you plan everything. I plan but as you know, emotions/empathy can get too involved so I'm way less calculating. Have you been like this since you started working at this job? Did you have a job before this one, by the way?

[secretk]

Originally Posted by The Apt (View Post) Yes, definitely, the vast majority of women are introverts, on both sides of the family actually. Pretty incredible. While just as many men on both sides are extroverts.

It's interesting that the preference was for the female to be the Introvert. Usually in our culture it's more common for the women to be Extrovert and bubbly and social and the men to be quite reserved Introverts. It's interesting that you change the stereotype.

I guess introversion and extroversion can change over time. Well, usually it's extroverts become more introverted. It's not usual for introverts to become more extroverted as you get older you would think.

I think that with the years the other functions get developed too so they sort of bring balance. Actually I am more Extrovert now than when I was a child because my second function gets really developed. I still get drained but I can fake Extroversion. I was unable to do so when I was a kid. Granted I do it because I have a purpose, but still now most people think that I am Extrovert because of the way I act at work. No one can grasp how drained I get because it's quite internal.

[secretk]

Originally Posted by The Apt (View Post) Incredible! I admire how logical you have been. Like, you plan everything. I plan but as you know, emotions/empathy can get too involved so I'm way less calculating. Have you been like this since you started working at this job? Did you have a job before this one, by the way?

This is my first job and I have always been calculating. At the age of 5 I had a picture in my head how I would be as a grown up woman. I knew that it does not make sense to invest time and efforts to socialize in school or college so I did not. I do it at work because I have a plan.

I am aware of my energy levels and I always do stuff in a way to preserve my energy. I need to plan my social interactions really in advance to ensure that I won't end up exhausted. I always have Plan A, B and C for everything. People usually say "Do not make plans because you will be disappointed when they don't happen". That does not happen for me. My plans always materialize because I shape my reality in a way to fit into my plans. Sooner or later (I am very patient person) I get what I want and how I wanted it.

Think about it. Just October last year I told M to wait and hold a bit. I promised him that he would work 100 % on my product, that I would isolate him from our now ex boss and that he will have the chance to choose who he wants to work with. And fast forward to now just 5 months later. I gave him all that. He will work 100 % on my product, he would not work with our ex boss and he got the chance to choose who he will be in our team so the people he will work with. I told him that I would protect him from the jerk and I did that as well. Even M did not believe that I can do all of that in that short period of time. It's no wonder that he does things for me that he would never do for our ex boss. He knows that if he wants something from me I would work to make it happen. It might take me a few months but I end up doing it. Our ex boss is just empty words. He never did 5 % for M of what I did just for 5 months.

I always know what I am doing and I always have a plan that is not just few weeks away, it's years away. I now plan what would be my next step while working on proving myself in this new role for me. I dream big and I am not afraid to do so. I am patient and I am wiling to wait years to do stuff, but I do succeed and usually people do not see it coming.

[jediwands]

Originally Posted by secretk (View Post) It's interesting that the preference was for the female to be the Introvert. Usually in our culture it's more common for the women to be Extrovert and bubbly and social and the men to be quite reserved Introverts. It's interesting that you change the stereotype.

I wonder if it’s culture differences or just a certain pattern within my family. But most definitely the women are way more introverted. Women are very strong too, calling the shots, lol.

I think that with the years the other functions get developed too so they sort of bring balance. Actually I am more Extrovert now than when I was a child because my second function gets really developed. I still get drained but I can fake Extroversion. I was unable to do so when I was a kid. Granted I do it because I have a purpose, but still now most people think that I am Extrovert because of the way I act at work. No one can grasp how drained I get because it's quite internal.

Interesting. I can fake it too but I was way more extroverted as a child/teen. Some of it was due to sports. Some of it due to just being a teen and social life mattered more even if I was still introverted. As an adult I’m a million times more introverted.

[jediwands]

Originally Posted by secretk (View Post) This is my first job and I have always been calculating. At the age of 5 I had a picture in my head how I would be as a grown up woman. I knew that it does not make sense to invest time and efforts to socialize in school or college so I did not. I do it at work because I have a plan. I am aware of my energy levels and I always do stuff in a way to preserve my energy. I need to plan my social interactions really in advance to ensure that I won't end up exhausted. I always have Plan A, B and C for everything. People usually say "Do not make plans because you will be disappointed when they don't happen". That does not happen for me. My plans always materialize because I shape my reality in a way to fit into my plans. Sooner or later (I am very patient person) I get what I want and how I wanted it. Think about it. Just October last year I told M to wait and hold a bit. I promised him that he would work 100 % on my product, that I would isolate him from our now ex boss and that he will have the chance to choose who he wants to work with. And fast forward to now just 5 months later. I gave him all that. He will work 100 % on my product, he would not work with our ex boss and he got the chance to choose who he will be in our team so the people he will work with. I told him that I would protect him from the jerk and I did that as well. Even M did not believe that I can do all of that in that short period of time. It's no wonder that he does things for me that he would never do for our ex boss. He knows that if he wants something from me I would work to make it happen. It might take me a few months but I end up doing it. Our ex boss is just empty words. He never did 5 % for M of what I did just for 5 months. I always know what I am doing and I always have a plan that is not just few weeks away, it's years away. I now plan what would be my next step while working on proving myself in this new role for me. I dream big and I am not afraid to do so. I am patient and I am wiling to wait years to do stuff, but I do succeed and usually people do not see it coming.

You are the definition of an old Soul. There’s no other way to explain this. To be 5 years old and have that much understanding? Incredible.

[jediwands]

Putting in tags since it’s big:

Spoiler:

Rowling as an INFJ... if she did not admit she is an INFJ more than once on Twitter... all you have to do is read the quote and know she is, lol.