The 100 - Off Topic #37 | Where we can talk about chess, fishing and drinking Whisky - Page 21

Steph26 · 01-02-2018, 11:00 AM

Kate

Thanks for reinforcing my feelings and emotions.

We had said good riddance to them, but they still make contact. They just showed up at my husband’s work a couple of weeks ago, which is soooo ridiculous and out of line. Thank goodness he has a really understanding and supportive boss. So we said good riddance as much as we could, I guess. We never respond to them, never talk to them, never contact them. We just walk away from them when they show up somewhere; they live hours away from us! My husband only contacted him this time to tell him about the name thing, which was obviously a bust and just proved again how awful they are.

CanIcallYouKate · 01-02-2018, 11:05 AM

I am so so sorry, Steph

After such a long time, it is crazy for them to show up at your husband's work

I hope you will manage to get past this and enjoy the name you picked out!
And I hope they will leave you alone in the future!

girl under the floor · 01-02-2018, 11:59 AM

A name is "just" a name, but I can relate cause I always knew what I'd want to name my daughter. Like, from the age where I first started thinking about it, I knew that that was the name.
And then Husband absolutely hated the name. And it was not going to happen (didn't). And as crazy as it may sound, I had to mourn the loss of the name.

Based on your own feelings about it I agree with Kate, Steph

(well, I did to begin with tbh

)
You're not gonna have any practical problem here. And you've loved this name for so long, it'd be a shame to give up on it now, because of that reason.
(we currently have 3 boys in our family who all have a variation of the same name)
I honestly thought it was weird, cause mine is the oldest of the three and I personally never would've done that

Steph26 · 01-02-2018, 12:19 PM

Paula, Kate

thanks

And Kate, they showed up twice last year at his work too. That’s only the tip of things they do. I’m telling you...they are really awful.

Thank you everyone! I’m feeling a little better about sticking with the name. I talked to our girls about possibly using a different name, and the both got teary; my 5-year-old even said a prayer that I would feel better about keeping the name. Bless their hearts. They are the sweetest little tender hearted girls.

Damocles · 01-02-2018, 06:33 PM

Steph! Stick with your name. Those people can go eff themselves. It sounds like they are pure garbage, and you won't be seeing them regularly (they sound crappy enough that you shouldn't see them at all) and you're having the baby first. Use the name you've been thinking of for 12 years.

I totally get all the emotions that come with this and those you've listed, and if you think it's really going to bother you forever, then maybe choose a different name. Do you have a second place name? Does the thought of NOT using that name you wanted, bum you out beyond belief?

It's a weird and frustrating situation, but from what you've outlined, I think it's more than ok if you stick with your name.

Steph26 · 01-02-2018, 07:44 PM

Lisa

We don’t see them at all, by the way. They’ll just show up somewhere they know where my husband is; they never show up anywhere I am.

We cut them out 10.5 years ago, but that doesn’t stop them from sending stuff, trying to call people we know, etc. It has decreased a lot in the last 5 years or so, thank goodness!

I have other names I “like,” but none of them feel right. I know that if we name him something else, I won’t truly be happy with it, and I’ll know that we only named him that because of them. If I see or hear the name, it would bring up sadness and frustration. What’s crazy is that it’s not even a super popular name. Go figure.

kiss the wind · 01-02-2018, 11:06 PM

Steph, I'd say go ahead and use the name. It clearly wouldn't be the same if you used a different name, and don't let them using it keep you from using it and being happy with the name you had picked a long time ago.