Everwood - County High Cafeteria #110 (General OT): We are still sick, it's already snowed, so we don't care about a title - Page 2

**ds44** · 11-04-2017, 11:51 AM

I have to finish report cards and learning skills report. Tonight I am going to buy a coat and maybe some shoes from the mall. Tomorrow I have to finish some paper work and try and relax. I just feel like there is so much to do and never enough time to just sit back and enjoy.

**jediwands** · 11-04-2017, 01:36 PM

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Originally Posted by secretk (View Post)

No. It's sold here. I have not had time to mix something on my own.

Work okay?

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In my opinion he likes to be in the center of the attention. He hates when someone else is more interesting than him. He started having issues with me 4-5 years ago. It's a long story but basically they were in a phase where they wanted all people of the team to go to lunch together with the HR and they would question everyone that did not go with them. At that point of time there was a co-worker that could not stand the HR because they were kind of competing for the boss then. It's a long love story drama involving triangle.

On the other hand I was in the phase where I had started accepting my Introvert side, I was getting sure of myself and did not want people to tell me what I can or can't do. There was some email discussion involving the whole team back then - like 25 people. I might have sent email explaining pretty well that I do not plan to give anyone explanation when I go to lunch, who I go to lunch with and where. I might have said that we are not in kindergarten

. I might have also said that even my parents do not ask me such questions so I won't allow this at work.

To sum up I wrote an email where I basically firmly questioned his authority in front of the whole team. You know my writing style. I can be respectful and still attack someone's integrity. I guess I struck a nerve because a close co-worker of him came yelling at me in the room to tell me that she has work and she does not want to read the emails. I told her in front of people in the room (like 15) that I do not allow anyone to yell me and that she could ignore the emails if she does not want to read them. Let's just say that in the end another male co-worker and my boss had to drag her physically outside of the room

.

At that point they were pretty annoyed with me because I was the first one that publicly denied the power of this guy. I made it pretty clear that if they piss me off, I have no issues talking about the love triangle. Let's just say that it would not have been good if people officially knew that my boss had something with a team member and I knew details of that relationship. It would not also be good if it was clear that the HR knew and she knew. I had proof of that as well.

On top of that I had the protection from above. So basically they had no way to fight with me. He used the performance evaluation at work to undermine me but that ended up bad because man do I hate if someone tries to talk BS. My boss then had to listen to me talk 90 minutes answering back every little thing he said. I started giving specific examples how he does not understand my project and he causes issues for me when he writes completely irrelevant emails claiming stuff that are not true. I told them that I know about meetings I should not know about. It was a meeting with the project manager where he specifically asked to have a separate team that is lead by me. Man was he pissed that I know about this and he was like you don't need to know about stuff like that. I told them that I know anyway about this but they should think is it normal to have this information from other people and not him. I also made clear for them that the project manager tells me stuff even if they do not want me to know them and in the end of they day I have this information. So I implied that I have close relationship with that guy and they can't know what we talk about because it's only between us.

For me it really is about his ego and the fact that I dared to attack him in front of anyone and I do not care about him. Especially when I knew stuff and they were not able to directly attack me or threaten me. I was actually the one that I threatened because I still could use this information to screw up the HR. I have a permission from the third person basically (she left the company year after that) to use this information however I want. This is why they have issues now with this former team member. For them to keep this under the radar they need obedient people and the two of us are not

. We not just complain, we just fight back in front of everyone and this way the team sees that it's possible and there are people that question his authority. They have issues with this. If this happens in front of the team, the others would learn to fight back as well. You know this way better than me. I even said this to the HR last week. I specifically told her that if he pisses me off, I won't hold back no matter how many people are witnessing it and this won't be good for the team. She had to just nod about it

. Given the email I wrote they know what I can do and what I can say and how I can say it.

Wow!

First off, how dare that dude question who goes to lunch with the group and who doesn’t. That is about as childish, petty, and ridiculous as it gets.

Second, just wow!

So basically you know about the affair or the triangle and that ammunition prevents them from screwing you over as well as being able to tell it like it is when you deem it appropriate, especially against the jerk that it seems everyone wants to protect.

How many people do you think know about the past office affair?

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My boss tried to include him for the negotiations with the French. Basically I was about to go in a vacation for a week and he wanted to include this guy, but this female co-worker from Germany specifically told me that he can be in the meeting if he is kept in check and he does not cause any conflicts. So I told this my boss of course and told him to talk to the jerk. He was like "Why don't you talk to him?". I told him that we do not get along, but they do so it's better this to come from him. And it's anyway just a friendly advise from me to let him know that he is watched in every meeting he participates

.

He also however likes to play the victim. He would act like the big boss in front of people below him in the hierarchy, but he would lay low when there are people above him. Once he had a task that was related to my project. It was a report he had to do but he needed to know how data is organized and he did not know. So we had weekly phone calls with some French. He would act like a kid. Every time some of the French would talk he would start making those faces. I swear it was really childish and really unprofessional and weird for a guy that is almost 50 years old.

Wow! He sounds like a real tool and shame on your boss for allowing his jerky behavior.

**jediwands** · 11-04-2017, 01:40 PM

We’re heading to the Wild game shortly. I can’t believe I have to leave all of these college football games, LOL. There’s also college hockey, pro basketball but college football is what I don’t want to leave. Oh well, Minnesota Wild hockey here we come!

**jediwands** · 11-04-2017, 01:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ds44 (View Post)

I have to finish report cards and learning skills report. Tonight I am going to buy a coat and maybe some shoes from the mall. Tomorrow I have to finish some paper work and try and relax. I just feel like there is so much to do and never enough time to just sit back and enjoy.

I can imagine! You are a married, full time working mom with several children, even small children. It has to be tough juggling work and family life while also trying to get some alone time for yourself.

secretk · 11-04-2017, 01:46 PM

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Originally Posted by The Apt (View Post)

Work okay?

It helps, but only if I use it regularly.

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Wow!

First off, how dare that dude question who goes to lunch with the group and who doesn’t. That is about as childish, petty, and ridiculous as it gets.

For him lunch is team building exercise. And the team should go to lunch together

. And if someone is not going with them for lunch then they do not like them

. And he takes it personally. However currently the jerk goes to lunch only with the boss

. Most of the others do not want to go to lunch with them

.

I did have the same reaction as you though. Who is he to tell me when I will go to lunch and with who? Like really? I do not allow anyone to tell me what to do, let alone him

.

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Second, just wow!

So basically you know about the affair or the triangle and that ammunition prevents them from screwing you over as well as being able to tell it like it is when you deem it appropriate, especially against the jerk that it seems everyone wants to protect.

It does come to play especially considering my connections with people above them. And the fact that I work on a project they do not know. They do not like me, but they know that if I leave they will have to deal with it and I won't be exactly helpful and that would for sure piss off the management.

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How many people do you think know about the past office affair?

I think that the people from the soccer team know. I mean the people that were back then in the soccer team. Some people from our team know as well but they left the team. I am not sure that my boss knows.

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Wow! He sounds like a real tool and shame on your boss for allowing his jerky behavior.

Oh yeah for sure

. The jerk is a jerk but the people that are enabling his behavior are to blame too

.

**jediwands** · 11-04-2017, 02:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by secretk (View Post)

It helps, but only if I use it regularly.

Do you use it fairly regularly?

Quote:

For him lunch is team building exercise. And the team should go to lunch together

. And if someone is not going with them for lunch then they do not like them

. And he takes it personally. However currently the jerk goes to lunch only with the boss

. Most of the others do not want to go to lunch with them

.

I did have the same reaction as you though. Who is he to tell me when I will go to lunch and with who? Like really? I do not allow anyone to tell me what to do, let alone him

.

Wow, I've never heard of such a thing. Lunch and breaks should be personal and your own decision how you want to spend your time. Those are perks and benefits you get. He shouldn't be allowed to tell people how they spend their lunch time. That's insanity. It is one thing if you come in on a weekend and have lunch together while working because you are trying to meet a deadline or stay late and get some dinner together. But to be forced to eat lunch on the clock when you should do as you please during this time... that is wrong. Good for you for not accepting it!

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It does come to play especially considering my connections with people above them. And the fact that I work on a project they do not know. They do not like me, but they know that if I leave they will have to deal with it and I won't be exactly helpful and that would for sure piss off the management.

Haha, awesome.

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I think that the people from the soccer team know. I mean the people that were back then in the soccer team. Some people from our team know as well but they left the team. I am not sure that my boss knows.

Got it. Wait, who had the affair? The jerk? I was thinking your boss for some reason.

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Oh yeah for sure

. The jerk is a jerk but the people that are enabling his behavior are to blame too

.

100%.

secretk · 11-04-2017, 02:40 PM

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Originally Posted by The Apt (View Post)

Do you use it fairly regularly?

I should use it every day after shower. Water makes my skin go insane.

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Wow, I've never heard of such a thing. Lunch and breaks should be personal and your own decision how you want to spend your time. Those are perks and benefits you get. He shouldn't be allowed to tell people how they spend their lunch time. That's insanity. It is one thing if you come in on a weekend and have lunch together while working because you are trying to meet a deadline or stay late and get some dinner together. But to be forced to eat lunch on the clock when you should do as you please during this time... that is wrong. Good for you for not accepting it!

Exactly my point! Lunch is my time and I decide what to do with it.

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Got it. Wait, who had the affair? The jerk? I was thinking your boss for some reason.

My former boss. The drama was ugly and basically once it ended both him and the girl left the company. The HR is the one that remained in the company. I do think that the HR is still with my former boss though. Not sure if they have friends with benefits relationship or something more serious, but I am sure that she keeps contact with him.

***Jerry D*** · 11-04-2017, 03:39 PM

We're having Filet Mignon, Baked Potatoes, and Corn on the Cob for dinner tonight! I don't know if I've mentioned it here before, but I bought a cooker called a Cinder Cooker which is like a George Foreman Grill except that you can set it to get to a specific temperature (like 133 Degrees F for Medium Rare Steaks) and then it tells you when it gets there so there's no guesswork. I finish everything off by searing the steaks on a cast iron pan, and they come out so good. I've been ordering steaks through Omaha Steaks and I bought a freezer to store them in. Teresa and I both enjoy it.

**ds44** · 11-04-2017, 07:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jerry D (View Post)

We're having Filet Mignon, Baked Potatoes, and Corn on the Cob for dinner tonight! I don't know if I've mentioned it here before, but I bought a cooker called a Cinder Cooker which is like a George Foreman Grill except that you can set it to get to a specific temperature (like 133 Degrees F for Medium Rare Steaks) and then it tells you when it gets there so there's no guesswork. I finish everything off by searing the steaks on a cast iron pan, and they come out so good. I've been ordering steaks through Omaha Steaks and I bought a freezer to store them in. Teresa and I both enjoy it.

oh wow that sounds amazing!

***Jerry D*** · 11-04-2017, 07:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ds44 (View Post)

oh wow that sounds amazing!

Thanks Shu! Everything came out good!

**jediwands** · 11-04-2017, 08:08 PM

Back from hockey game. Wild lost to their rival, Chicago, but it was close until the last 5 minutes... no score actually. Then the Wild were penalized for a major and Chicago scored since they had tons of minutes up a man. A really good game though! I love going to Wild games.

**jediwands** · 11-04-2017, 08:12 PM

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Originally Posted by secretk (View Post)

I should use it every day after shower. Water makes my skin go insane.

Got it.

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Exactly my point! Lunch is my time and I decide what to do with it.

So very weird. I would have never put up with that crap either.

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My former boss. The drama was ugly and basically once it ended both him and the girl left the company. The HR is the one that remained in the company. I do think that the HR is still with my former boss though. Not sure if they have friends with benefits relationship or something more serious, but I am sure that she keeps contact with him.

Oh that's right! I got the boss part right, it was just a former boss.

Incredible situation. Is there a close or big age difference between them?

**jediwands** · 11-04-2017, 08:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jerry D (View Post)

We're having Filet Mignon, Baked Potatoes, and Corn on the Cob for dinner tonight! I don't know if I've mentioned it here before, but I bought a cooker called a Cinder Cooker which is like a George Foreman Grill except that you can set it to get to a specific temperature (like 133 Degrees F for Medium Rare Steaks) and then it tells you when it gets there so there's no guesswork. I finish everything off by searing the steaks on a cast iron pan, and they come out so good. I've been ordering steaks through Omaha Steaks and I bought a freezer to store them in. Teresa and I both enjoy it.

Yum!!!!! Sounds so delicious! Glad dinner was a success! I am going to have to look into Omaha Steaks. I've heard great things about the company. How do you order it? Big orders or little orders every so often?

secretk · 11-05-2017, 01:14 AM

Glad that you had fun in the game Michelle! Agh sucks that Wild did not win.

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Originally Posted by The Apt (View Post)

So very weird. I would have never put up with that crap either.

In the beginning my mother was like "Maybe it's not that big deal and you should not have written that email" but now she is like go you

. She sees that I was 10000 % right about him and that it's better that I said something than let him annoy and piss me off.

Quote:

Oh that's right! I got the boss part right, it was just a former boss.

Incredible situation. Is there a close or big age difference between them?

There is a big age difference. He was 39 years old and she was 25 at that point of life. Or something like that.

It's a situation that does not pain them in a good light. The thing is we are close with her so she basically told me a lot of stuff. Like almost all of the details that could be shared. We still are in contact with her.

There are other former co-workers from the team that left the company that know the story, but not in so many details like me. I know when it happened. I know what every one of those three did. Basically I was witnessing it real life while the rest found out once the triangle was over.

**jediwands** · 11-05-2017, 09:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by secretk (View Post)

Glad that you had fun in the game Michelle! Agh sucks that Wild did not win.

Thanks! This sounds weird but there's other reasons I love hockey so much... the sound of the skates hitting the ice, seeing the ice spray around, the smell of the ice rink, just watching them skate. I find it all beautiful.

Still, it would have been nice seeing an in person win.

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In the beginning my mother was like "Maybe it's not that big deal and you should not have written that email" but now she is like go you

. She sees that I was 10000 % right about him and that it's better that I said something than let him annoy and piss me off.

That's great.

When did you write the email? How long ago?

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There is a big age difference. He was 39 years old and she was 25 at that point of life. Or something like that.

It's a situation that does not pain them in a good light. The thing is we are close with her so she basically told me a lot of stuff. Like almost all of the details that could be shared. We still are in contact with her.

There are other former co-workers from the team that left the company that know the story, but not in so many details like me. I know when it happened. I know what every one of those three did. Basically I was witnessing it real life while the rest found out once the triangle was over.

Wow so did she confide in you while it was going on? These two are not together right now? 39 and 25 is a big age difference but at least she was a grown adult.

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Fan Forum > TV Shows - Past > Everwood > County High Cafeteria #110 (General OT): We are still sick, it's already snowed, so we don't care about a title