[Beatriz]

textures used for the background by LJ user arisubox

This is the story of two soulmates, two best friends from childhood that had to strugle very hard to find their way in each other's lifes once romance entered their world. Ill crossed fate lovers, their destiny didn't seem to be the one they expected to. But there is always hope...

^ Check out the Dawson's Creek Virtual Season 7 to find out how it all ended!

.: best scenes :.

(coming soon)

.: icons of the moment :.

.: wp of the moment :.

[Chase.This.Light]

thanks for the new thread, Bea!

We need to get some stuff for the opening thread!

[Beatriz]

A fic to get the thread started:

Ok, so this is another one part, kinda bittersweet, but anyway:

The way it should have always been

Author’s note: Ok, so this scene was clearly such a D/J sign. It inspired this one part fic to me the other day. I don’t know why, because it came out of nowhere, but it did. It’s a sad fic, and I don’t totally like it, because it doesn’t convey all the things I wanted to say, but oh well. I just wanted to get it out of me, because it wouldn’t let me concentrate in other things. Feedback, even if to tell me that it’s horrible, is welcome Also, this fic in unedited, so if you see any mistake, please let me know. Thanx!

“Oh, I realized how much greater his hurt would be than mine, how many oceans bigger. All the years I had with Ellie-- 3 children, a home, a good life. Still, all that time, he had that part of her soul you give your first love. When he goes, he'll be with her. I suppose that's the way it should have always been.” Griffith, ‘A winter’s tale’

“History has a way to repeat itself” Dawson

----------------------------------------

“The way it should have always been”

Lily had called him two days ago and now there he was, in old Capeside, saying good-bye to one of his best friends. The best one actually. Because no matter the distance, no matter that they had hardly spoken to each other in the last three years since Joey died. He had always been, and would always remain until the day Pacey died, his best friend. What was incongruent and even a little stupid given their past, but if someone had ever get him, loved him and respected him for what he had been, that had to be no other than Dawson Leery. At last when things were still innocent and gold.

The wake was still going on and he needed a break. Some journalists had been trying to access to the private reception earlier, but things were quiet now. His 65 years old self was tired though. He was old and it showed. It had for a long time. He had not grown old as well as he would have liked. After his forty birthday he had lost the charming quality that had made him so irresistible to woman. Hell, even before that, and he knew it. And since Joey died, he just didn’t worry about it anymore. His belly was a good proof of it.

Sitting in a bench of what had been the Leery´s house in his childhood days and was now Lily’s property (Dawson had led it to her in his testament), he thought about what should have been the very last moments of Dawson. It had happened in his set, in L.A. That was something that had never changed through the years: he lived for his job. Dawson was working in his last movie, a movie about spacemen and far away planets and civilizations that the film industry was eagerly awaiting for. It seems like he felt a pain in his left arm but ignored it, disregarding his PA´s advice. A few hours later, the pain had increased and he finally allowed someone in the crew to call for an ambulance. Word is he was speaking on his cell phone to the postproduction people as they were taking him away.

He did not make it to the hospital.

Now his body was back to Capeside. Back home. Back to where he, despite everything, belonged.

And now he was all alone. Pacey Witter, owner of a chain of restaurants in N.Y, father of a beautiful 33 years old woman and grandfather of a 13 years old boy felt utterly and desperately alone as he was sitting there, contemplating the departure of a long lost friend.

Last time he had seen him had been the day Joey had died. Pacey had spent two entire days by her bedside. Dawson had been in a European festival when he had been told the news. He had left everything and took a flight to NY as soon as he was informed. Pacey remembered the moment he saw him so well.

Dawson entered the hospital in a hurry, his figure still looking good and firm at his 60s. He had a wild look in his eyes that could hardly disguise and did not say a word when he entered the room where she was staying. He just looked at her, his eyes travelling up and down her still figure and she opened her eyes, turning her head to the door with difficult. Pacey had walked outside, waiting in the aisle. Thirty minutes later, Dawson walked out, his eyes circled red, but that was all the sings he could gather from him, all the hints he would give him. It was as if he was wearing a mask. There was no expression in his dark blue eyes, no expression on his face. However, Pacey knew Joey had died. He knew she had been just waiting for him to say good-bye. Dawson finally broke down when they took her away in a stretcher, covered with a sheet. Doctors had had to give him some valium, and Pacey had felt guilty and regretful for some reason. In the middle of his grieve, he had still been able to see his pain, and to notice that it was bigger and deeper and more devasting than he had expected it to be. Maybe… maybe even bigger than his own, what ashamed him immensely.

Through the years, things had changed so much. He and Joey had feel into routine, their love had settled into something safe, something that was there but they hardly thought about. They raised their girl, had good and bad times, and life kept going everyday. Who had been before a restless charmer to all woman he could get, was then a complacent and regular husband.

Dawson, in the other hand, was the big start, the one who had now any woman he wanted left and right, some of them much younger than him. Dawson had travelled all over the world at least twice, he had a house in London, another one in Berlin, and his visits, even though far and away, were always awaited with expectation and sweat palms. Sarah, his daughter, adored him. And what to say about Joey. She would just hold him forever and a minute more as soon as he walked through their door in New York, and sometimes Dawson even had to wipe away some tears from her eyes. He would do it quietly, lovingly, as they would stare into each other’s eyes and smile. Later, both, Pacey and Dawson, would also hug each other and pat their backs with affection. There were no harsh feelings, no questions, no suspicions. Things were the way they were and that was all that was there to know for both of them.

Staring to the creek, he wondered why today, of all days, he was thinking about the things he was thinking. About Joey. About himself. About Dawson. About their story and about a conversation they had had almost 3 years ago.

“Pacey… don’t laugh at me, but… can you feel her?” “Feel her? What do you mean?” “I mean… feel her, as to feel her around” “You mean Joey?” a hesitation in the other side of the line “Yes” “Well, I think about her every day if that’s what you mean” “No, not that. I mean that if you feel sometimes as if you would turn around and see her standing there. Or as if she would be calling your name, you know?” “No. If that’s what you mean, then no, I don’t feel her” a pause “Oh – and he laughed – Must be my imagination then. I’ve always had too much of that anyway, just don’t mind me” and he laughed a little more “Dawson, are you ok?” Pacey was the one who had lost his wife, and still Dawson was who he was concerned about the most. “Yes, yes, I’m perfectly fine. Listen, I gotta go. Will talk to you soon, ok?” “`K” “Take care Pacey” “You too Dawson”

When his eyes focussed in the present time, he realized someone was sitting in the dock. His blond hair looked almost white under the sunlight, and his legs were hanging over the edge. For a moment, his heart stopped and he thought he was having a vision. Then he realized that he was Dawson’s son, Matthew.

Dawson had got married and had had a son pretty late. In his mid-forties. Everybody had been surprised when he announced he was going to get married, and to a 20 years old younger woman. He had divorced in his mid-fifties, when Mathew was still a child. But they would spend long periods of time together. Besides his job, Matt was the only thing Dawson would never neglect. Matt was 18 years old nowadays, and his amazing look alike to Dawson was enough to take Pacey´s breath away almost every day, but today more than ever. Matt and Dawson relationship had been very alike to the one Dawson had had with his own father. With a start, Pacey realized that Matt had lost his father almost at the same age Dawson had lost his. Something about that made him terribly, terribly sad.

He watched as another boy, out of nowhere, walked down the creek to join Mathew. It was Robert, his grandson. Brown haired, 13 years old, he had met Matthew just the day before and immediately was obvious to everybody that he was his new hero. Matt was, after all, a man to his eyes, entering college in just a couple of months, with a girlfriend and all. Pacey watched as he sat by Matthew’s side and he could see him wording something to him. The two of them just stayed there, chatting, as Pacey took comfort for some reason in that image, that reminded him of another ones between another blond haired and brown haired boy of long, long ago. Life was just a circle after all.

“Hey Pacey! Pass me the ball!”

“You’re kidding! You couldn’t catch it even if your life depended on it”

“Just pass me the ball” he had said.

And he could perfectly picture a 10 years old Dawson running for the ball, right there, in that very same backyard, catching it and Joey clapping her hands and cheering him while Pacey mumbled that it had been just luck.

Pacey smiled and shook his head at the memory.

“Hey” Lily said to him weakly and sat by his side, clutching her jacket to her body. The day was warm, but still, she had been wearing that jacket the whole day.

“Hey” he replied back quietly and passed an arm around her shoulders, Lily leaning on him, Pacey looking down at her. “How are you doing sweet heart?”

“I’m doing fine” she said, looking straightforward. And he wanted to believe her. She looked so tired and sad that day though. Much older than hers 47 years old. Her hair, still blond and long was falling over her shoulders and big black bags were under her eyes. Pacey kissed the top of her head.

“So there he is,” she said, pointing to Matt sitting in the creek. “His mother asked me if I knew where he was, and I didn’t know where he had gone.”

“Robert is with him,” Pacey said, as if that was enough. And to him it was.

He knew that Rob, even though he was only 13, would take care of him and try to make him feel better at all costs. Like Pacey had done himself that day, when he drove Dawson to that curve where Mitch had died, the day of the funeral. He hadn’t been able to help him like he had wanted to, maybe because they had too much of a background to allow Dawson to open totally to him. But Matt and Rob… despite the age gasp, Pacey hoped Rob could help Matt despite how different they were, like Dawson and him used to help each other before everything get so complicated.

Lily and he just sat there in silence for a while, looking over to the two boys in the creek. The sun of the warm summer day made the surface of the water sparkle every now and then, like poetry to their eyes, and they both wondered how it was possible to be the witness of such a beautiful thing in a dark day like that one.

It was because no matter how much it hurts, no matter who you have lost, the world keeps on turning. Life keeps on going. Nothing can stop it.

“He’s gonna be with her, you know?” Pacey said, all of a sudden.

Lily looked up at him, wondering what he was talking about.

“Almost 40 years together, and still, I know that she will come to look for him and take him with her. Wanna know why I know it?”

He felt her nodding against his shoulder.

“One day, only a few months after Joey died, he called me.”

Lily was now looking back to the creek, just listening to his words quietly, her eyes closed. Pacey was deep in thought, remembering again, maybe more for himself than for her.

“He asked me if I had ever had the feeling that she was around since she was gone. I had not. He said that sometimes… he had felt that… weird feeling. Then he laughed it off and asked me to forget it, that it was probably just his imagination. But it’s just that I don’t think it was.”

Lily was now looking up at him again.

“They were soul mates. Joey told me a million times. Every time he was away for too long (and the greatest part of the times he was), and she would miss him, she would just mope around for a while and then a few days later she would receive a call, or a letter, or something, and life would be good again. It was as if he could feel it too”

Lily squeezed her arm, tears pricking in the back of her eyes.

“I had her in life. The part she allowed me to have at least. I always knew and felt that there was a part of her reserved to him, but God, I loved her and I didn’t care. Now though, he will have her forever. And maybe that was the way it should have always been.”

There was another silence as Lily linked her arm with him and a laugh was heard from the dock. It was Matt’s. Pacey smiled.

“And the funniest thing is that it makes me feel good knowing that. Knowing that Joey won’t be alone now anymore up there or wherever it is that souls go. And you should be happy about it too. Trust me, he’s gonna be fine”

“I know. But even though I know that, this pain in my chest just won’t go away” she said, and she chocked in the last words. Pacey rubbed her back.

“Lily?” it was Alex, telling her name softly from behind the bench. They hadn’t heard him come.

She turned to him, weeping her tears and reaching her hand for him to hold it. He kneeled in front of her.

“Honey, are you ok?” he asked concerned. He had noticed her absence and walked out the house to look for her, expecting to find her sitting in the dock or something.

“Yes” she said, offering her husband a weak smile “Yes, I’m fine.” And she patted his hand lovingly.

“I’m sorry honey, but we need you inside” Alex said, an apology in his low and loving voice. He just wanted to be alone with the love of his life to take that pain away somehow, but he knew he would have to wait for that.

Lily stood up and nodded her head, her hand still in his as he rose from his position. She turned to Pacey before walking away.

“Pacey, could we talk later? About… my brother. Maybe you can tell me again about that prank you pulled together in high school, or that day in detention when he broke your nose” Pacey left a throaty laugh escape his mouth when she said that “Or even about the time you two get lost in L.A because you were so wasted you couldn’t say the difference between left and right.”

“Count with it” he told her.

Lily smiled at him warmly, leant on Alex and entered the house, back to her duties. Leaving Pacey alone and back to his memories.

“I love Dawson. He’s my soul mate”

That’s what she had told him. Many, many years later she had asked him to be buried in the ruins, clutching to his hand in her bed at the hospital, begging to him with her eyes that he would take care of it. That he promised it. Of course, he did. And today Dawson had been buried there too, by her side. It had been stipulated three years ago. Coincidence? Of course not.

He never knew what Dawson and Joey had talked that day in the hospital. Dawson never told him and he never asked. But he always knew that whatever that had been what they had said to each other, it had been important, and it will be something that now will always belong to them.

For the next hour, he would just sit there, old ghosts coming to visit him. What was that that Joey had told him years ago about ghosts taunting them and they three being only their former shelves or something like that until they resolved whatever it was they had to resolve?. His memory failed him often lately.

Maybe now, once and for all, those ghosts could rest in peace. Now that the two souls that were meant to be together forever would be finally together, maybe the ghosts would finally leave.

But even if not, Pacey would welcome them as a companion. They were all that was left of yesterday now.

The end

And now I'm going to sleep!

*rushes out FF*

[rossfangirl86]

Love the opening post!

Will read that later.

I love that title, so pretty.

[Beatriz]

Originally Posted by rossfangirl86 (View Post) I love that title, so pretty.

I know, I love that quote

[Brighter Than Sunshine]

No Bea! You made me cry again. That was lovely. And I loved how you based it on that scene in "A winter's tale". I would love to know what Dawson and Joey talked about in the hospital. Maybe you could write it up? Possibly...

[Beatriz]

Thank you Brit And sorry again

I wanted to write that conversation in a separate fic, but I really don't know what I could write that would convey everything I want them to say Maybe one day, never say never

Unless you can offer some ideas

[Brighter Than Sunshine]

^ I have absolutly no ideas.

Never ever say never.

[Beatriz]

Originally Posted by Brighter Than Sunshine (View Post) I have absolutly no ideas.

Well, in that case, thank you for your help

[Brighter Than Sunshine]

^ *sings* Your my inspiration

The way I get inspired is I read a book or watch a movie or go to my favorite spot. It's cheesy, but it works.

[Beatriz]

Ok, I can wait until you do that

[rossfangirl86]

Aww that was such a sad piece.

[Beatriz]

OK, OK, I promise that the next one will be happier. I don't like making ppl cry.



*bwahaahaha*

[Cris]

Oh, a new thread!

I love love the title! Well, it belongs to my fave manip by Bea!

[Beatriz]

Originally Posted by Cris (View Post) Well, it belongs to my fave manip by Bea!

Thank you

Will post more fic later on, as promised