LG Stargirl

Great post, Grati!

I'll never understand why anyone would ever begrudge Meredith focusing on this very high stakes job she has in a noble profession that is vital to humanity. A career she has dedicated years upon years to train for. She has never chosen her career in place of her family ... she made it very clear to Derek in the s10 finale she was not staying in Seattle simply because of her job, but because they had built their lives there. In NO WAY has the show indicated Meredith is not caring about her children right now - that is simply untrue. Who is parenting them during this time? Who is managing their nanny/daycare situations, making sure they're in clean clothes each day, providing diapers for Bailiey, making sure they have food in some way, clean sheets, baths, and the countless other daily responsibilities required to care for two small children each day. Even if she needs to delegate some of those responsibilities, she's still the one making sure they occur each day. This has NEVER been a show where the surgeons stand around chatting about their kids. Mer can't be faulted and assumed to be a non-caring mom because the show doesn't have her always talking about them. By that measure, Derek didn't even mention the effects on the kids when he angrily decided to leave. But I'm not going to go to Patrick's board and fault Derek for not caring about his kids. Instead, I'm going to assume he's doing something to communicate with them since Mer doesn't seem to be upset he's neglecting them. Let's go ahead and give Mer the same benefit of the doubt. Geez. In the end, Meredith is the parent who is present.

All characters in this show have to give focus to their careers. Their profession demands it. Why Meredith would be singled out as "selfish" makes no sense. Using this logic, Derek is certainly selfish as well. There's no denying he truly wanted to do this project, she did not force him into it. He tries to do these noble gestures his heart isn't in (staying in Seattle for his family, trying to make his marriage to Addison work) but in the end it's never a good idea for all involved (by his own admission). So how is it all on Meredith to be "selfish"? No. Way.

Ha. There's an entire tv guide item (which has its roots in twitter) dedicated to how awful Meredith has been since Derek has left and how she needs to be put in her place (I LOVE when people can't stand women having a career!) and how she only cares about herself. What a load of crap. When the sneak came out about her streak, people tweeted she is "insufferable". And yet, when she was made aware of her streak what was the first thing she thought about? Not that she's an A+ amazing surgeon shark that would make dead mommy proud, but how does this relate to/affect her relationship to Derek. And then there are those saying that she didn't make Derek feel special and important enough and that she didn't give enough to their relationship. Hmmm. Well, they've been frustrated with each other lately for sure. BUT. Meredith Grey has stood in front of a bullet for this man, confronted her fears about becoming a mother, sacrificed a specialty she had a love for, given birth to their child, stepped up for him when he was ill and gave a speech for him even though he broke a promise to her ... how much blood do people want from this woman to prove herself in this relationship? And even with their recent problems she's warm enough to give him the physical affection in the shower he wanted (so she's not freezing him out). People need to take note of these things.

Just because Meredith is cognizant of Ellis' layers as she finds out about Maggie and watches videos of Ellis does NOT mean she wishes to emulate her mother. Heck, I admire my mom VERY much, but it certainly in no way means I wish to become my mother. And just because Meredith has voiced a fear about becoming her mother doesn't mean the audience (or Derek) should throw it in her face every single time she shows any amount of opinion/strength/insecurity.

darkxtwisty

You're missing 98% of the show if you don't see the similarities between Ellis and Meredith this season. Besides, she's a fictional character. The only person who knows what she wants is Shonda. It's not that deep.

Anyway, this is the Amelia/Mer thread, so let's talk about them. No matter what happens, I hope that whatever Meredith says to Amelia won't put a dent in their relationship. I can't see Amelia going off on Meredith like she would Derek, though.

LG Stargirl

No. No, I'm not. Bold statement and nice try!!! But absolutely not.

Quite frankly, Meredith Grey told us herself exactly what she wanted. She wanted to make the choice to share her life with Derek.

darkxtwisty

Love that Cat said that. (:
Wish Amelia would weigh in her two cents about the Derek situation, since she knew Addison and all. She could have some valid input.

QueenMeredith

Yep, she wants to share her success with him too.

I doubt we'll see any scenes with Amelia in this episode since she's going to be involved with Owen's mom. I think Maggie and Callie will be the ones giving their two cents.

darkxtwisty

Still not sold on Callie/Mer/Maggie. I know you guys like the friendship, and I liked the scene last ep. Still only like it in small doses and don't find Maggie as a believable BFF for Mer. Amelia would've been better.

QueenMeredith

They've been one of my fave part of the season.

darkxtwisty

Had they written Amelia better, she could have been a great fifth addition to then in which I would be more sold. I don't like who've they chosen Amelia to interact with (namely Arizona...hating their interaction mainly because Arizona is my least favorite character). I like Amelia/Owen, though, and I'm eager for MerDer to find out and their reactions, I just don't want it to put a rift in Mer/Amelia. IMO it shouldn't, but these show writers might have a different agenda.

QueenMeredith

I am not really invested in Amelia, I liked her with Meredith though.. especially since all her interactions were with Arizona, and I find Owen boring most of the time.

I doubt it's going to cause any rift, and it will probably won't be that bad either. I bet it has something to do with Cristina, even if they didn't belong together.. Owen was in love with her. [Hell if she comes back I doubt he'll think twice to go for her IMO] Meredith had no problem with his girlfriend last season, but she wasn't close to her or her sister in law, which she doesn't want to get hurt, which my guess that's how it will go.. She doesn't want her to get hurt by him.

runawaaay

I dont know how will Mer react. And why she would have a problem about it

QueenMeredith

I hate they are doing this, when she has more important things to think about.

runawaaay

They seem to have scenes next episode

QueenMeredith

Yes, from the ctv promo.

runawaaay

Cant wait

QueenMeredith

I liked their scene together.

They have more next week.. wish I hope it will end up well..