[ryanforever]

Prefer them as a friends

[SweetxMistake]

And I find it baffling how Meredith fans can never admit when she's in the wrong. I'm not sure anyone would be making lists about who is more supportive of the other if the Alex/Meredith friendship were portrayed just a little bit more two-sidedly. Meredith used to want to be there for Alex no matter what in the past, but ever since she decided that he's her new person she hasn't supported Alex one bit. I think the first time since 11x01 I saw that a little was in 12x03, but then again it was mainly Arizona who was there for him.

I'm not about making checklists and seeing that Alex has done 10 things for Meredith and Meredith only 5 for him. I think you're right, friendships are just about being there for each other when the other one needs you, but I think that's where the writers are failing with Meredith/Alex because it's always Alex being there for Meredith while having nothing going on himself. While Meredith is listening to Maggie's parent and intern problems and giving her advice while ignoring Alex when he has something that's bothering him. You can't possibly tell me that as Meredith fans you aren't catching up on these facts?

The way I see things is that Alex wants to be there for Meredith and support her but for some reason she doesn't want to do the same with him anymore. She's also been very rude to him at times last season, so I possibly can't grasp how that makes her such a great friend to him at the moment.

[darkxtwisty]

Originally Posted by SweetxMistake (View Post) And I find it baffling how Meredith fans can never admit when she's in the wrong. I'm not sure anyone would be making lists about who is more supportive of the other if the Alex/Meredith friendship were portrayed just a little bit more two-sidedly. Meredith used to want to be there for Alex no matter what in the past, but ever since she decided that he's her new person she hasn't supported Alex one bit. I think the first time since 11x01 I saw that a little was in 12x03, but then again it was mainly Arizona who was there for him. I'm not about making checklists and seeing that Alex has done 10 things for Meredith and Meredith only 5 for him. I think you're right, friendships are just about being there for each other when the other one needs you, but I think that's where the writers are failing with Meredith/Alex because it's always Alex being there for Meredith while having nothing going on himself. While Meredith is listening to Maggie's parent and intern problems and giving her advice while ignoring Alex when he has something that's bothering him. You can't possibly tell me that as Meredith fans you aren't catching up on these facts? The way I see things is that Alex wants to be there for Meredith and support her but for some reason she doesn't want to do the same with him anymore. She's also been very rude to him at times last season, so I possibly can't grasp how that makes her such a great friend to him at the moment.

No character is perfect, especially not Meredith Grey. No person is perfect. I don't understand why people get so defensive about a fictional character. I mean, seriously? You're absolutely right, Meredith hasn't been there for Alex in a very long time. I think season ten was the last. That's not my opinion; it's a fact.

At least Cristina and Meredith's friendship was two-sided. Alex and Meredith have been very one-sided the last two seasons.

[ryanforever]

True,come on,i'ts just a TV SHOW....

[darkxtwisty]

I swear, some people take TV shows more personally than their real life relationships.

[LG Stargirl]

Haha, well most of us here are completely aware this is a fictional tv show. We come on this fan forum to discuss our opinions about the characters that made us fans in the first place. It's the entire reason this place exists. I'm kind of loving where this lecture of "don't take a tv show so seriously" is coming from though ... REALLY?!?!?

Let's clear something up. When someone has an opinion different from yours, it in no way makes them "defensive" - it means they don't agree with you. I laid out how I feel in my previous post and my opinions have everything to do with how I personally perceive friendships based on my two closest friends (and also a relative who DOES keep track of what everyone does for him and constantly calls people out if they're not doing what he thinks is "enough" - he, of course, has a very difficult time maintaining relationships).

It is a very unfortunate viewpoint that only "Meredith fans" who are by blinded by Meredith Grey's 'perfection' could possibly deem her as anything less than a horrible and terrible friend to Alex - and they'd better admit she sucks as a friend because it's a FACT. (ummm, that is actually the very definition of an opinion and not a fact at all, by the way). I run much deeper than that, and my thoughts on these characters run far deeper as well.

Meredith and Alex are in no way in conflict with each other at this time. This is why I personally don't feel any reason to deem either one of them as "wrong". The main argument "against" Meredith seems to be she isn't there enough for Alex - and it was even mentioned she doesn't want to be there for him. And yet, this is not something that Alex himself is struggling with. We haven't seen him wishing Meredith could offer him support while she doesn't show up ... him being frustrated because he wishes she could listen to his problems. This hasn't happened AT ALL. Some people consider the board seat situation at the beginning of season 11 this, but Alex asked her about it, she told him why she voted the way she did, and they had actual communication on the topic. Whatever he needs from Meredith in the form of friendship he certainly seems to be getting because she is someone he is caring for deeply at the moment. It has been acknowledged the writers haven't really given Alex any sustainable interesting storyline in the last couple of seasons ... EVERYONE agrees with that. And yet Meredith has been held to the fire for 'not being there enough' for him. Again, I'm sure if Alex needed support Meredith wasn't giving, he would call her out and let her know - that's who he is. He doesn't stick around for relationships he feels he's getting screwed in.

In fact, in both of the previous two episodes Alex has iNSISTED on supporting Mer even when she was telling him it wasn't necessary. Last night, he 100% sought her out to comfort her ... she seemed pretty content to be in the chapel "talking" to Derek before he came. At the dinner party, she even reminded Alex that Jo was waiting for him when he didn't want to leave her by herself and she told him she would be okay. Oops - there blows the theory that Meredith insists and demands he be her "person" at his own personal sacrifice. Make no mistake about it, Alex WANTS and CHOOSES to be there for her.

Jolex/Jo fans have some issues with Meredith, but they're certainly understanding that Alex has some responsibility in his friendship with Meredith. He is not some victim that is pining for more time alone with his girlfriend but isn't able to be with Jo because of his obligation to his "person". He is choosing the path of providing Meredith support right now.

Why is he doing this? Trying to put myself in Alex's shoes, I'm remembering how his friendship with Meredith came about. Everyone else was at odds with him and disliked him, and she is the one who saw his human side and looked further than his snarky exterior. She found someone she could commiserate with about having a tough childhood (I love when Alex said she was practically raised by wolves) and he found someone he could let underneath his metaphoric suit of protective armor he wears for the world. Meredith brought him into their group and offered him understanding he had found in very few places in his life before. And this is why I love their friendship.

Originally Posted by SweetxMistake (View Post) And I find it baffling how Meredith fans can never admit when she's in the wrong.

I find it telling that it is important to you that she be labeled as "wrong". Surely you understand that these characters are more complex and this friendship runs far deeper than that. It isn't a black and white topic. This statement also very much contradicts that you are completely objective. You have a strong opinion on this, which makes you subjective . . . and that's okay. That's what this forum is here for. However, it doesn't mean that everyone is going to agree with you and have the same opinion. And it certainly doesn't mean your opinion is so completely on point that others have to "admit" what you feel is correct. I disagree with your stance on this topic, and it's pretty clear you disagree with mine -- and that's just how it is.

[LG Stargirl]

NEW THREAD

http://www.fanforum.com/f210/reflect.../#post83919506

[QueenMeredith]

PREACH!!!!!

[begonia]

updated the newer thread