Daisy34

I love Kevin more than I have ever loved anyone else in my entire life. He is the one I want to be with. He's the last one I think about before I go to sleep and the first thing when I wake up and practically every moment in between. Everytime I look up into the star filled sky, I think of Kevin. Just like in art class, Kevin is my inspiration for so many things and I could not imagine my life without him [img]smilies/glow.gif[/img]

When Kevin broke my heart 2 years ago, my world was shattered and I was depressed for a whole year b/c of it (my senior year of high school). He "dated" my best friend for a few weeks and then he got with the girl he liked for so long. They were together for 1.5 years and in that time, we never talked b/c she was too controlling of him. In that time my heart learned to live without him and in the meantime I started college. I decided to take German class and thats how I met Scott. Right at the beginning of the year, I developed a crush for him and it got deeper as the year went on. Everyone hated him, but I liked him and everyone knew it. He touched my heart and in a sense, reopened it after Kevin. I never thought another boy could affect me like Kevin did. Granted, Scott has not even come close to touching my heart as Kevin did, but Scott did so much for me that I love him for it. He showed me that I can feel for someone else and believe in someone when no one else would. He made me laugh and smile and truly brought life back into my life. [img]smilies/glow.gif[/img]

Toward the end of the year, Kevin came back into my life when his relationship ended with his ex. A couple months later I found out Scott wasn't coming back. As happy as I was to have Kevin back in my life (you have no idea), a part of my heart was with Scott. I will always have feelings for Scott, but they do not compare with the feelings I have for Kevin. And these past few days I had to deal with these undealt-with feelings with Scott (b/c I didn't have closure) and also having yearning for Kevin. I guess it was the shock of finally getting my wish of seeing Scott again and then that wonderful feeling when I saw him for the first time after 7 months. It was a lot for me to deal with, which made me extremely emotional and thus led to a lot of confusion and for that I'm sorry. Everyone teases me that I am always torn between these too and maybe on the surface I am, but my heart knows better.. and my heart loves Kevin [img]smilies/glow.gif[/img]

I hope that clarifies..

[img]smilies/love.gif[/img] and hugs,
Kel

[ 01-06-2004: Message edited Daisy34 ]