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I don't think Xander would hit a woman, unless she was a vampire or a demon, like all of his ex's from S1-2. He doesn't seem like that kind of guy, and he's afraid of being that kind of guy. He saw what he could become and broke it off with Anya coz he didn't want to hurt her.
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Here comes the rain again  Falling from the stars | Drenched in my pain again Becoming who we are As my memory rests | But never forgets what I lost
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