Ron_Beckett

It's not loserish I do the same thing. I've always been a dreamer too. There are days when I live inside of my fantasies more so than my regular life because my regular life is boring and not as interesting.

I'm currently writing a sci-fi story but I plan to add in some romance. I'm a writer too so my stories are in a sense my fantasies on paper. And I've read plenty of books to know how to write romance.

Since my love life in this reality I've got to live it out somewhere! (now that totally sounds nerdish).

It's normal right- to have fantasies about sex? Because as embarrasing as it is, I have had one or two (againt my will such as in night dreams or whatever). I usually feel guilty about it afterwards but I can't control what lies in my subconcious mind.

breakdown<3

o m g, its completely normal because i have fantasies about what my first time will be like too. you know how you said you dream about a different reality for yourself because you feel like your life is boring? well i do the exact same thing it doesn't sound nerdish at all! my life hasn't turned out the way i hoped it would, its not nearly as interesting or as great as i wish i would be, so i live out my life in fantasies. sometimes i pretend like a celeb is my boyfriend or something, now i know that probably sounds nerdish to you! lol. and yeah, its completely normal to have those fantasies, i know i do sometimes.

you're a writer! oh my, id love to read your stuff someday, if you'd let me.

Ron_Beckett

In this aspect we are a lot alike. It's pretty cool. God makes everyone different in someway but He also makes them the same which is cool. It makes it easier to identify better with people.

Yeah sure, I'd let you read some of my stuff. I just need to dig most of it out. But sure.

Sgt. Angle

People who wait until marriage to have sex say that they're doing it because they want to save themselves for their true love. I got a question for ya. How do you know someone is your true love? What is true love?

And if you do this true love waits thing, what are the rules? Are you allowed kiss and hug and touch and makeout?

breakdown<3

about the true love waits ring, i have no idea, you'd have to ask my friend Ron about that but i do know personally for me, i have rules i've set out for myself. It';s okay to kiss the guy you're with, i mean kissing is supposed to be a sign of your affection and its okae to touch, nothing wrong with hugging and making out, thats all apart of showing each other how much you love each other. I think you dont have to have sex to show someone how much you love them, cuddling and all that can show them just as much. wish a lot of boys felt that way but sadly no. lol

true love.. how do you know what that is? thats hard because i dont even know what love is myself, ive never been in love.

Ron, awwe, i feel the same, we're so alike in so many ways.

p.s cant wait to see the stories

Ron_Beckett

I have the same views as Christina. The first boyfriend I had was patient enough with me about the whole tongue kissing stuff. He said that when I felt ready we would; as long as it was on my terms. He was a great guy to some extent and for that I appreciated it. The part that wasn't so great was that he had a lying tendency.

As for what true love is- that I have no answer to because I've never experienced it either. I don't know what it's like to be loved or to be in love.
******
According to Christiananswers.net, this is how it described true love:

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.
—I Corinthians 13:4-8a (NIV)

This verse describes the characteristics of true love. These qualities can certainly be found in the person of Jesus Christ, and they can be found in all truly loving relationships. The problem with trying to “find” love in our dating lives, is that too often we don't look for these characteristics. Rather we look at physical appearance, popularity, or wealth. These are not the qualities that God looks at and neither should we.

******

However, it's one thing to read what the Bible says about it or what ever else you find that describes true love and a whole other to experience. That's always been my favorite Bible verse but currently it's one that I can't apply to my own life. I suppose I could keep those qualities in mind but again, true love cannot be defined unless it's been experienced.

That's just my view on the matter however.

wag1000

Wow, you have just completley read my mind. I totally feel exactly the same way.

I'm 19 (20 too in a couple of months) I've never been in any type of a relationship. I'm scared to think that I won't have been in any by the time i'm 30.

I don't know if I believe in no sex before marriage, I think for me it will have to be the right time and of course the right person for that moment. That being said, I don't want to rush into anything.

Sex still grosses me out, and the same reason it scares me.

Ron_Beckett

welcome wag1000.

I seem to be doing that a lot lately (reading people's minds.) LOL. Just kidding- no I think we all just feel the same way on this level.

I have a hard time talking about sex to anyone because people don't really understand how I feel. At least here I can talk about it openly and there are people who reply and know what it's like to not be understood when it comes to this subject.

wag1000

Please just call me Bernadette

Yeah I think we do, it's nice to know that you aren't alone and theres someone out there who has the same thoughts as you.

Ditto! I don't even really talk about sex with ANYONE at all.

Ron_Beckett

Okay Bernadette, you can call me Ron.

Okay so what else should be talked about? Now I'm starting to run out of things to say.

s e r e n i t y

Wow I can relate to most of the things you guys have said, I definately live in a fantasy world, trying to imagine different scenarios.

Though I cant really relate on the 'finding someone who will wait' thing, cause well I live in a country where its unacceptable to have sex before marriage so everyone here waits (accept well a very select few) so I dont have that fear, it must be real hard for you and I applaud you for making the choice.

Random question - Christina, who is the girl in your icon?

Ron_Beckett

Pottyaboutharry: That's very cool that sex before marriage is unacceptable. I wish things were that way in the states but unfortunately the whole 'free choice' we have here in the states prevents it from being so. People only seem to live by their own morals.

Okay here's a new question:

What is your opinion about living with your boyfriend/girlfriend before marriage? Without the sex?

Personally that's something I could never do either.

s e r e n i t y

The thing I dont understand is if you are already living with someone, and youre sleeping together and in some cases have a child then whats the point in getting marriage, whats gonna change, everythings gonna be the same.

But living together without sex is something I couldnt do either, too much temptation.

Sgt. Angle

What about going on vacations and trips with your boyfriend or girlfriend? Do you share a hotel room with two beds or just one bed or get two separate hotel rooms? Is it really that bad to sleep in the same bed with your boyfriend/girlfriend sometimes?

MsPerfectionist

I'm 23 & still a virgin. I believe that I should wait 'til I find someone I love & trust & comfortable with. As far as mariage goes...I don't really think it's necessary.

Now I've been struggling. There's this guy that honestly I wanna have sex with. We used to like each other but it ended, now we're friends. We both want each other, we're comfortable & truly trust one & other. There truly is connection between us, we both feel it.

I don't know if sex got into my head now over the years...


if i trust him & love him enough to move in with him, i don't see why i wouldn't have sex with him.