sunnykerr

^ That's a normal reaction, you know that, right? I've seen people be angry at family members who had committed suicide 20-30 years prior. Anger is a normal reaction to a person who dies naturally. So it obviously even worse when the person chose to die.

Be patient with yourself. Being suddenly angry doesn't mean you're not as "moved on" as you thought you were either. It's normal to have emotions when something brings that experience back to the forefront for you.

Ropetuned

YesI know it's normal just thst enough bad is going on right now it's even more confusing.

Most likely just added impact due to the weather, time of year and already dealing with mental illness on top of that.

Drunk On You

When I was 20 I had a close friend take his life. I cried for months. It took a long time for me to heal from that. Even 11 years later I find myself thinking about him every now and then and makes me sad. I don't remember if I was ever truly anger at him. A few years ago my cousin took his life too. I never went through the anger. With my cousin I knew he was finally at peace.

*KindKennen*

Always hard losing someone who took their own life....even for good reasons...I had a friend in high school who finally succeeded in killing himself...it was really rough on the mother and brother because they were both home...It was Valentine's Day 1974. He shot himself with his dad's handgun. The gun had been locked up and kept unloaded. My friend of course knew where his dad kept the bullets, key and gun locked up. He left a note. LSD was a big drug in the 1970's still. My friend...he had been experiencing with different drugs to feel more like he fit in. He was extremely intelligent. He had a photographic memory. Was an advanced piano player. Instead of buying piano books/sheet music...he would go to the music store and look through all the songs he wanted to learn. Just looking through the book/song once was all that he needed and had it memorized for life. No matter how complicated or how many sharps or flats were in the song!!! Too bad he had too many scary "flash backs" from the drug LSD....that was what drove him to attempt suicide 3 times and finally succeed on the 4th try this time with a gun to his head. We were pretty close. His mom called me after it happened....I helped clean their home for 6 months and be a good sounding board and support system for her and the family We attended the same church. In his suicide note he told his parents not to blame themselves....that there was nothing they could have done to prevent this....that he had been stupid thinking he could fit in by being friends with the druggies and taking LSD on a regular basis for a while. Then when flash back began...he stopped....but not the flash backs.....they became too much for him to take so he took his life to finally be set free...He believed in spite of him ending his own life he was going to Heaven and tried to reassure his parents of that and what he believed...Also...for his dad not to feel guilty for having the gun in the house...he would have found another way to finally succeed.....He professed his love for them and older brother and said not to worry and apologized on the date of his departure....Valentine's Day...."I can't handle one more flash back...too scary"....

sunnykerr

Ropeturned... Whatever it is, I hope you don't beat yourself up over feeling it. That's all I meant to say.

royalღcaliber

Today is the one year anniversary of my Dad's passing. I'm not doing so good. But for the past week, I've been writing up this blog post. I don't think it turned out the way I wanted but I thought I'd share it all the same.

Why my Dad reminds me of Jack Pearson on This Is Us!

sunnykerr

That is pretty uncanny.

Drunk On You

Looks like my grandparents are trying to sue us.

Ropetuned

My mom passed away after a week in the hospital with a simple bone Break when she came in. Lots of things unfolded and she died because of something completely unrelated. Those who have lost a parent charge to share how I sort through the anger st myself, the confusion and feeling of not knowing my place in the world?

sunnykerr

^ I'm so sorry for your loss.

April, just try to focus on the fact that there is nothing for them to gain in doing that.

Ropetuned

^ thanks

m&m fkan

My sister died a year ago of cancer. It was really fast, and hard to witness.
One of my sisters is very vocal about missing her, and kind of made herself the "star" of the whole ordeal. She posted daily reports about how the illness was progressing, and that if someone wanted to visit the sick sister, she was the one to speak to.

She acts like she was always kind to her, when it isn't true.

My sister (the one who died) had a drinking problem for years. My other sister would avoid her, and talk **** about her, constantly.

When she got cancer, all of a sudden they were best friends. I couldn't even get to see her.

Now, she's "grieving" like she was the only one to miss our sister.

I don't post my feelings on Facebook, or social media. I do miss my sister, but I keep it to myself. I don't make a big show about being sad. I don't cry in front of people. ever.

This is the most I've "talked" about it since it happened.

*KindKennen*

^

That is hard no matter how long or recent it has been...and each of us react differently during the dying phase and grieving phase. My husband never cried in front of me when his grandparents died or parents died one at a time 3 weeks a part.

I helped take care of his parents while they were still in their home their last ten years of life. Before being hospitalized at the end. My mother in-law died December 30th, 2005 and my father in-law died January 21st 2006. Just 3 weeks apart. It broke my father in-law's heart being separated by his wife but he hung on for 3 more weeks being able to say good bye to his last living sister.

Sunrise at Midnight

hugs for everyone

sunnykerr

My grandparents died three weeks apart, down to the hour, as well. She had Alzheimer's and he had really bad heart disease. She passed first and then he had two strokes, back to back, three weeks later, at the same time.

My dad, who was and is their oldest, really took it hard. Two years ago, he lost his two younger brothers within the same month. One had massively metasticized bladder cancer and the other had lung cancer.

But my dad's an old softy, for all the he's usually completely unemotional about everything. So he did cry. Kind of freaked me out, to be honest. It's not always easy to be there for someone who's going through such intense grief. It seems too big a chasm to be able to help with.