Deacon Claybourne | Chip Esten #5: "They got a saying in the program, you're only as sick as your secrets. Right now, I'm pretty sick of being sick."
 

Deacon's quotes

"But for me, music's all I got. It's the only part of my life that I ever seem to be able to do halfway good, so... it means something to me."

"Don't you call me a legend, Kent. I'm not dead yet."

"I always used to say that I got sober for myself, you know? That's what you're supposed to say. It was never true. I got sober for Rayna."

Juliette: "Takes a lot of people to make a good show."
Deacon: "Really? Johnny Cash only needed three."

"All that mundane stuff, that's pretty much just what I've been waiting for."

Avery: "You know, I've wondered... why didn't you take your shot back in the day, when you had some heat?"
Deacon: "I don't know. I was... playing guitar for Rayna, writing hit songs. I guess I just didn't feel like I needed to be famous."

"You should've told me, Ray. I'm sorry. Look, I was... A mess when you found out you were pregnant. I get that. But I got better, and... I've been good a long time, right? So why didn't you tell me when she was like... 3, you know? Or 5 or 10 or... Why didn't you just give me a little more time to be her daddy."

"This morning, my daughter asked me where I was the night she was born. I told her I was on the road. Truth is, I was on the road to hell."

"Sobriety is not a onetime fight. It goes on... one day at a time, as we say... for your entire life. If you're gonna do a fight that long, you better have yourself a support system. For me, that happens to be my family. Got my niece Scarlett, who keeps me honest. I also got my daughter, Maddie, who's helped me... well, to see the world through brand-new eyes. And both of them have shown me what it means to love somebody more than I love myself, which has given my life meaning."

"This thing of ours... I know what I've done. I broke your heart a thousand different ways, and, God, I am sorry for that. But something changed. Me. I know how to love you now. That man you always wanted me to be... I am that man. And I can be a husband now, and I can be a father. And I can give you everything that we were always meant to have."

Chip about Deacon

C&I: What about you? Do you remember the moment when you felt totally comfortable as Deacon Claybourne?

Esten: There was a moment like that during my audition for the pilot, which is rare. It was like, I think I understand this guy. I get this guy. Auditioning as Deacon was almost easier for me because of all the things I knew I had to do, and what I had to look like. I had to look like I was a little weary, like I didn’t care one way or the other whether I got it. Life was going to kick me in the teeth somehow, no matter what, so let’s just do this and get it over with.

C&I: Deacon has gone through some wild mood swings during the past three seasons. He’s been up, he’s been down. He’s gone off the wagon, he’s crawled back onto it. We’ve seen him as the mature stud when he was first dealing with Juliette Barnes. And we’ve seen him trying to be a father for a daughter he didn’t know was his. This role must be a godsend for an actor. Even while you keep playing the same character, you get to go to extremes.

Esten: You’re absolutely onto something. That is, to me, the thrilling part of this character. Like, how many facets do you have? That’s a good measure of how good a character is, and how much fun you get to have playing him. As human beings we have these infinite facets, and I would say that’s what the writers have done with Deacon. There are so many facets, and I love how that comes across in the chemistry he develops with other characters. Stick him with Avery Barkley [Jonathan Jackson] and there’s the comedy thing that comes out. There’s that bang between old and young — “I know what I’m doing,” and “You’re not listening.” But then stick him with Maddie [Lennon Stella], and you see a whole ’nother side of this guy. Yeah, he was that guy you said was an older stud. But now he’s got a daughter he cares about, and there’s that softness that is organically, naturally going to come out when he’s in a scene with her.

It all comes down to the fact that Callie and our writing staff write a guy who is deeply human, and cares. He just cares. There’s no cynicism there. In fact, life might be a little easier for him if he didn’t care so much. That’s the lesson in life that you teach your children. Yeah, you could leather up a little bit and not care so much. That might be easier, but it’s not living.

[source]

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Tftnt :)

I was just re-watching some scenes from season 3B and noticed that in 318 Deacon is wearing a different jacket at the concert than he was when he was at the house with Maddie. I mean I guess they could be making the point that he already had a bunch of his clothes over there, but it seems like a goof.

Seems like a very insignificant goof when you consider the kind of goof this show can have... :lol:

Ha! Yes. Just pointing it out though since I noticed it. :)

^ I choose to believe he already had a bunch of his clothes over there. :D

That's exactly what it is. :lol:

I'm going to go with the he had a bunch of clothes at the house theory. He had taken the jacket off in the second scene with Maddie. And the one he was wearing when he showed up at the house looked much heavier. So maybe he rethought his jacket selection when he went to leave again :lol:

Chip being adorably terrible at this game at CMA Fest :lol: :love: (he did get the DR one though)

"I'll tell you who she better have said it to! She said a lot of nice things to Luke Wheeler, but she didn't say THAT." He's the cutest. :love:

But he's still terrible at that game because he doesn't seem to remember that that DR line came from 301 and was immediately followed by "but I love him now." and some bs about a clean slate with Luke... so that wasn't nearly as nice a thing as he seems to think it was :lol:

A lot of them were weird line choices. There were so many better D/R lines she could have picked. Also, the only other lines I got were the Luke and Layla lines. They were hard y'all!

I feel like a really bad fan. How did I not realize that Esten is not his actual last name? And how did I not realize that his wife and kids use his real last name instead? Made me wonder if Esten is only for acting/singing purposes and if he's "Mr. Puskar" to his children's friends, teachers, on bills, etc. Hard to imagine!

Also, his wife and daughter made really adorable photo collages for him for Father's Day (thanks, Twitter!). What a sweet family!

I would imagine he only uses Esten for his career and he goes by Puskar everywhere else. A lot of celebrities do that. I think Esten is his middle name, or his mom's maiden name or something like that.

It's his middle name. He's Charles Esten Puskar III, so it's a family name. What I'm dying to know is how you pronounce that last name??