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Old 04-05-2015, 07:57 PM
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Originally Posted by lavitaebella (View Post)
As you know, I am not an Emmett fan at all, and him and Bay are my notp. But I can see why he got upset about her going to dinner with Tank and his dad.

With the whole Tank and the party thing, she probably just needed someone to talk to. I don't think her ex was the best person to talk to about relationship problems, but she probably thought, "oh hey we're friends and this is what friends do."

With Bay, I might not agree with her decisions, but I almost always understand why she did what she did. I don't think she did the right thing taking the fall for Daphne, but I can see why she did it: because Daphne wants to be a doctor, and in Bay's mind that was more important since she wants to be an artist. Can I just give her a huge hug or something??
I agree about the huge hug! Bay should have lots of love. She has the best heart of any character ever.

I understand her decisions, too. For an 19 year old, they make perfect sense.

I just don't understand why so many people believe that her decisions are solid and mature. Maybe a lot of people sharing their thoughts about it are 19, too.

I don't think Bay has done anything evil. The apology I would like to see Bay offer Emmett is more along the lines of something like this:
I didn't think about how you would feel when I did such and such (i.e., had dinner with Tank and his dad, took the fall for Daphne without consulting you, partied with Tank, shared our problems with Tank, etc.), and I should have thought about your feelings.
That's all I would really want her to say, just to acknowledge that Emmett's feelings matter, and she should have been looking out for him.

This woman on Twitter took me to task for saying that Bay should not have taken the fall for Daphne. She said that family always comes before boyfriends and she didn't want to communicate with anyone (like me) who doesn't understand that. (The last part of her comment made me wonder why she tagged me, then. )

It was obvious that, to her, no bond runs deeper than that of sisterhood.

I disagree.

But even if I agreed, even if family should always come before boyfriends, I would think that if you are planning to move 2000 miles to live with a man, that he is now your family.

It's fine if Bay is not ready for that level of commitment with Emmett (or with any man). Bay is only nineteen. She is young. I don't think Emmett even expected Bay to make the offer to move to LA.

But since Bay and Emmett were planning to move there together, Bay should have treated Emmett like a partner. Emmett should have come before Daphne. At the very least, Bay should have told Emmett before she made her decision. She should apologize for not showing her partner that consideration.

And even if Emmett didn't exist, Bay shouldn't have been taking the fall for Daphne.

When Bay backed out of their plan, I think, on some level, Emmett understood that she wasn't ready, that taking the fall for Daphne was something of a convenient excuse.

Because if Bay had really wanted to go to LA with Emmett, nothing would have stopped her.

And that's okay, that she didn't want to go. It's a big move. It's understandable that Bay would get cold feet.

But it's not really fair of Bay to be upset with Emmett, now that he has cold feet about her making the move. Bay chickened out first, and she only really got up her courage to make the move, when she felt Emmett slipping away.

I just don't think it's all Emmett's fault, and I am not saying that anyone here is saying that it is, but out there, in social media, nearly everyone is acting like Emmett is the most contemptible person to ever walk on the planet, and he is not.

Emmett is just a normal guy, and if Bay looks at her actions, she will understand how things shifted for Emmett, and why he doesn't feel sure about a forever with her anymore.

It's understandable. Bay needs to recognize her part in it. And yeah, Bay needs lots of hugs, too. I hope she gets them from someone who makes her feel safe and loved. I worry about her, especially because she has sacrificed so much for others.

I do wish people would stop saying that Emmett's love wasn't good enough, though. Emmett's love was great.
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