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Old 09-28-2011, 01:14 AM
Master Fan

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Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 21,315
Same drill... Please give me credit if you post this elsewhere. (Thanks to everyone who's been doing so!)

The Good Guy Fluctuation


This was all pre-taped and played back until the very end of the scene… Sheldon is in his office, writing on his whiteboard and talking to himself, then after he’s written a few things, says, “Well, that proves it. I’m completely worthless after 9:00.”

Then there’s this high pitched, echoey voice that calls out Sheldon’s name, and he goes into the hallway to investigate. The main hallway light sparks and goes out, and it’s all dark for a second until backup lights come on. The voice calls Sheldon’s name again, and there’s cackling. Sheldon’s not impressed, and says the spooky voice, ghost sounds, and witch cackles are all common things from haunted houses. Sheldon gets that it’s pre-Halloween jokesters, and tells them to come out, but no one does.

There’s “blood” on the wall, which Sheldon says just looks like… I can’t remember what, but basically it came from some equipment or chemical there at the university. It drips down to spell “See you in hell Sheldon,” and Sheldon says the only scary thing about that is the missing comma. A skeleton swings down in front of him, which does startle Sheldon a bit, and he says that the glowing skeleton on the zip line was pretty good.

Eventually Howard and Raj come out, saying they scared him, but Sheldon insists he wasn’t. They walk back into his office (here is where it was done live, but just once), and Sheldon says something about how surprising someone has something to do with higher intellect, and there’s no way that they could surprise him. Howard and Raj agree. Sheldon turns around to find Leonard standing behind him, wearing a mask (he’d came out from hiding behind the whiteboard while Sheldon was talking to Howard and Raj). Sheldon screams and falls to the ground.

The other three laugh, and Howard says something about who guessed that Sheldon would faint. Raj said that he had Sheldon would wet himself. Leonard says it looks like they all won.


The guys are at the comic book store, looking through a table. Leonard picks up one, and says, “Look, Sheldon, it’s Casper, the g-g-g-ghost!” Sheldon says that’s droll. Howard says not as droll as Sheldon lying on the ground in his own urine. Leonard walks away and says that was pretty droll… and on the last take, also said something about the ammonia.

Sheldon says to “enjoy your jibes, gentlemen,” and tells the other two that they may think they’ve scared a milk toast academic, but reminds them that he’s a son of the Lone Star state, Texas through and through. He tells them they know how to settle scores, and if they don’t believe him, ask Mexico.

A girl walks into the store, and Stuart stops by Howard, Raj, and Sheldon to say, “hot girl, nine o’clock,” then when they all look, “don’t everybody look at once!” Howard asks what she’s doing there, and says maybe she’s lost. Stuart says that doesn’t matter, then tells them to watch and learn. He goes up to her and says hi, she smiles and says hi back, then Stuart just stands there awkwardly and can’t come up with anything else. Finally he says, “that’s all,” and walks away, and as he passes the other guys again he tells him “shut up.”

The girl walks up to where Leonard’s looking through comics, and asks him if he’s going to take one of the comics that’s set aside on top, and he says yeah, it’s issue number XX, first appearance of Hellboy. She says she knows, she’s been looking for it for years, and I think he said so has he. She asks if she pretends to hit on him, if she could distract him long enough to slip away the comic. He says probably, but then she’d be using her powers for evil. She says she can’t do that, she promised her Kryptonian father she wouldn’t.

He laughs, she introduces herself as Alice, and he tells her his name. She tells him she’s cute, and Leonard says so is she, then tells her to go ahead and take the comic. Alice says she can’t do that, it’d be evil. On the last take, her line was changed to her saying no, with great power comes great responsibility. She asks him if he’d be up for a trade, though, and he says sure. So she writes her number on his hand, telling her to call him. He says his hands are kind of sweaty, and asks what that word is. She says it’s her name. Leonard says that makes a lot more sense than what he thought it was - penis.

She walks away, and Howard and Stuart come up to Leonard. Howard asks if he just picked up a girl at the comic book store, because if he did, he gets his picture on the wall. Leonard says no, he doesn’t think so, besides, he has a girlfriend. Stuart says that it’s the closest anyone has gotten, so he’s going up on the wall, and pulls out his phone to take a picture. And Leonard smiles and does this little pose.


Leonard and Sheldon are entering the lobby of the apartment building. Sheldon tells Leonard to remember to check the mail, and Leonard says he knows, Sheldon doesn’t need to keep reminding him. Sheldon says that him telling Leonard to check the mail isn’t suspicious, it’s consistent with his personality to fixate on things.

Penny’s also in the lobby, having just checked her mail, and she’s also holding some grocery bags with candy. Leonard asks if she’s got more Halloween candy, and Penny says yes, the candy she got the other day is already gone. She says it’s not good when Halloween and PMS happen at the same time. Sheldon reminds Leonard to check the mail again, but Leonard tells him to hold on, and tries to ask Penny how work was. But Sheldon’s impatient, so Leonard gives in and goes to check it.

As Leonard opens the mail box, Sheldon’s watching from a distance with his hands covering his ears (as Penny looks as Sheldon confused), but nothing happens. Leonard just pulls out a couple of leaflets, and says see Sheldon, nothing important. Sheldon looks confused, and Leonard and Penny start to go upstairs, but Leonard stops her after just a couple steps and motions for her to watch Sheldon.

Sheldon walks over to the mailbox, opens it, and this balloon-type thing inflates in his face, with Leonard’s face on it, along with a loud horn sound. Sheldon screams and falls backwards to the floor. Leonard walks up, and says that Sheldon may be from Texas, but he’s from New Jersey, and then he blows the horn again.


Guys’ apartment - Leonard and Alice are sitting on the couch, boxes of comic books in front of them. Leonard holds up a picture, and says it’s a portrait of him that Jim Lee drew at Comic Con a couple years ago. Alice asks what he’s wearing. Leonard says, come on, it’s Comic Con. Then he gives in and says that he was Lion-O from Thundercats. Alice says “I’m sure you got so laid in that.” On the first takes, Leonard said he didn’t go to Comic Con to get laid. Alice said she did. Leonard said that was very nice of her.

Then it was changed so Leonard’s response was no, but he did get to meet some person that I don’t remember the name of. Then it was changed again, to Leonard saying no, but Jessica Alba (?) did rub his furry belly.

Alice pulls out a comic book to show him something he drew, and he asks, you make your own comic book? She says yeah, it’s kinda based on her life. He says yeah, and points out her having sex with a guy in the top half of a Chewbacca costume, and asks if that was at Comic Con. She says you’d think so, but no.

Leonard keeps looking through it, and says that it’s all really good, but Alice starts kissing him. Leonard hesitates, and pulls back for a second, but then starts kissing her back. As they’re kissing, Alice asks if she can trade her comic book for the one he got from the store. He tells her she can have his car.


Pre-taped scene in Sheldon and Raj’s office… Sheldon walks in carrying a box from a pet store, opens up one of the drawers and Raj’s desk, pulls out a live snake from the box, and carefully places it in the desk. Then he goes and quickly cleans his hands with Purell. Sheldon hides the box, sits at his own desk, picks up his stapler and dumps the stapes out, and straightens the stack of papers he has in front of him. Raj comes in, says good morning, and sits at his desk.

Sheldon picks up the stapler, and tries to staple the papers, but announces that his stapler is out of staples. He says something about how that always happens when you need to staple something, and it’s a shame he didn’t know he was out when he was at Staples that morning. Raj points out that Sheldon has a bunch of paper clips on his desk, and Sheldon says that these papers need something more permanent to hold them together. Sheldon asks doesn’t Raj have extra staples in his top left drawer? Raj says he doesn’t know, and Sheldon tells him to be a lamb and check.

So Raj opens the door, but instead of being scared by the snake, picks it up, and asks if the mean man put him in the desk. Raj carries the snake out, saying something about finding something for it to eat. Sheldon’s left alone, and says to himself he tried to scare an Indian man with a snake, then something like, “you’re better than that, Cooper.”


Penny’s apartment. She’s making food when there’s a knock at the door, she yells to come in, and Leonard opens the door, asking if she’s got a minute. She says sure, and asks if he wants some mac and cheese. Leonard walks over and says, “No, lactose, gas.” She asks if he wants a glass of wine, and he says no, something in it would give him a headache.

She asks what’s up, and Leonard says, “So we used to date, right?” Penny says, “So that’s where I know you from!” Leonard says he’s got a relationship problem, and he knows that could be awkward to talk about with her, but as she knows the rest of his friends are all really stupid when it comes to this. Penny says it’s fine. Leonard asks if she’s sure, and Penny says yes. Leonard asks again if she’s okay with it, and tells her that she can come to him if she ever wants to talk about some problem with a guy she’s with. Penny says good, because there’s this guy she used to date that she’s about to force feed mac and cheese and wine if he doesn’t get to the point.

Leonard says fine, and starts to ask, “Is it cheating of a guy has a girlfriend and-” and Penny cuts in and says probably. But she tells him to go on, so he tells her how he met this girl, and they have a lot in common… Penny asks if they did it, and Leonard says no, but they made out. Penny smiles and says something like, look at your bad self. She asks if Leonard told her about Priya, and Leonard says no, he was going to, but there were too many tongues in his mouth. Penny tells him that’s gross.

Leonard says he’s not the type of guy who can sneak around and sleep around with two women, and Penny says that’s good, but then Leonard says he wants to be. Penny tells him than to sleep with the new girl and lie to Priya. Leonard says that’s still not him. So Penny says to break things off with the new girl. Leonard says let’s not to anything hasty, cause she’s really hot. Penny says if he likes the new girl so much, then maybe he should end things with Priya. Leonard says that he and Priya are in love, and he thinks they could get married some day.

Penny says, so basically you want to sleep with two women and have everyone be okay with it. Leonard says now they’re zeroing in on it. Penny asks him what his gut tells him. Leonard says it says to go to Penny, she’ll know what to do.


Sheldon’s sitting on the couch in his apartment, making final adjustments to this contraption that’s wired along his arm, ending with a sensor on the palm of his right hand. He stands, and pretends to speak to Howard, saying something about how Howard really did scare him I think, and telling him good job, and holding out his hand to shake. Sheldon then shakes his right hand with his left hand, and there’s a buzzing noise as Sheldon starts to shake, and he falls backwards onto the couch, and lies on it and twitches, before finally falling onto the floor. He sits up, and says it’s perfect.

Leonard walks in from the hallway and asks what Sheldon’s going. Sheldon says it’s science stuff, Leonard wouldn’t understand. Leonard says he’s going out, and opens the door, but hesitates and shuts it and sits on the arm of the couch. Sheldon says he thought Sheldon was going out, and Leonard says so did he, but he can’t make up his mind. Sheldon asks if he’s thinking about the bullies and big dogs. Leonard says no, he’s facing a moral dilemma.

Sheldon says that maybe he can help, he’s read all the moral philosophers, including Dr Seuss. Leonard says what the hell, and moves to sit on the couch seat, saying that he’s supposed to go meet Alice from the comic book store, but he’s still dating Priya, but she’s in India. Sheldon says so it’s a matter of sexual fidelity, and comments that they probably won’t be relying on Dr Seuss for this one - although one fish, two fish, red fish, blue fish could turn out to be surprisingly applicable.

But Sheldon then tells him about the German philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche who believed that morality was a fiction created by the mass of underlings to prevent the few others from rising above them. (That wording is way off on my part, but hopefully you get the gist.) Leonard says that actually helps. Sheldon says he should note that the philosopher died of syphilis.

Leonard stands and says screw it, he’s going. As he goes to the door, Sheldon tells him to get some orange juice on his way home. Leonard tells him that he’s questioning a lot of things right now in his life. Sheldon asks if one of those things is how he fells about orange juice. Leonard says no. Sheldon says then bring some home, Tropicana, no pulp.


Leonard and Alice are making out on the couch at her apartment. Leonard says it’s just like her comic book, and “this kind of thing never happens to Leonard Hofstadter.” Alice tells him that it won’t if he keeps talking about himself in the third person. Leonard says he gets like that, where he’ll keep on talking, and then girls will tell him - Alice cuts in and tells him to shut up. Leonard says yeah, that, or shush.

But then Leonard pulls back, and tells her he’s sorry, but he can’t do this. (Starting from the second take, this was where they started the scene, cutting everything in the above paragraph.) Alice asks if it’s her tongue stud, and says if it is, he’s got a surprise coming up later. Leonard says no, and he really wants to keep going… Alice asks, but? And Leonard tells her he has a girlfriend.

Alice says, “you’re kidding.” Leonard says no, but asks she’s okay with just being friends, right? Alice says she can’t believe it. Leonard asks about what. Alice says she was so stupid, and she thought he was a nice guy, but it turns out he’s just another jackass. Leonard says no, he stopped himself from being a jackass, so he’s still a nice guy. And he tells her that that’s not at all a reflection of her hotness, but just his goodness. And he says that’s kind of his super power, Captain Good Guy.

Cut to a shot of the hallway, Leonard getting pushed out of her apartment, and the door slamming behind him. Leonard pulls on his jacket, and says to himself as he walks away, “It’s okay, you did the right thing… you idiot!”


Pre-taped… Sheldon knocks at Howard’s door, and Howard answers it. Bernadette yells asking who it is, and Sheldon thinks it’s Mrs. Wolowitz. When Howard corrects him, Sheldon says something about how that’s startling.

Bernadette joins Howard at the door, and Sheldon says that he realized he’d never properly congratulated Howard on his engagement, I think, and he came over right away to do so. He holds out his hand to shake Howard’s, saying, put it there, buddy. Howard says they would have seen each other at work in 12 hours, and Sheldon could have just told him then. Sheldon asks impressed, and like he should have thought of that, and then holds out his hand for Howard to shake again.

So Howard does, and gets shocked by the buzzer, and clutches his chest and falls to the ground. Bernadette yells at Sheldon and says he knows Howard has a heart condition, why would he do that? Sheldon says he thought Howard was joking about that. Bernadette runs inside, then comes out with an injection of something, and tells Sheldon he’ll have to give Howard the shot, because it has to go through his chest cavity and she’s not strong enough.

Sheldon’s nervous when he sees the length of the needle, but with Bernadette’s urging he finally stabs Howard in the chest with it. Howard just opens his eyes and smiles and says Happy Halloween. He sits up and shows how the “needle” is on a spring and just slides in when you press against it. Sheldon asks, so this was all a ruse? And I think there was another line or two, but I can’t remember how it ended.


Guys’ apartment - Leonard starts video chatting with Priya. She happily greets him, and he tells her there’s something they need to talk about. He says how he met a girl, and they kissed, but that’s all that happened, and it’s never going to happen again, and he feels horrible and he’s sorry.

Priya’s not phased, and tells him it’s okay, it happens to everybody. Leonard’s relieved and first, and says he doesn’t deserve her, but then asks, “happens to everybody?” Priya hesitates, and says she wasn’t going to tell him… but a few weeks ago she kind of cheated on him. Leonard asks what kind of means, and Priya says that she slept with her ex. Priya tries to downplay it, saying that they both made a little mistake. Leonard says no, he made a little mistake, she made a big one. Priya says that it’s not a contest. Leonard says that it is, and she won.

Then Leonard says something like he needs to think, or he can’t talk to her right now, or something like that, and closes his laptop. He sits back on the couch, takes off his glasses and rubs his eyes, and says he can’t believe it.

And then Sheldon gets his revenge on Leonard for scaring him. And it is so amazing, that I’m not going to tell you guys what it is so you can be surprised. I actually almost hate just that I’m telling you it happens, even though I’m not saying how he does it, because it was such a shock, but yeah. There’s a little something for you all to look forward to.

A few random behind-the-scenes things… Between scenes at one point, an audience member was doing a freestyle rap, and was going on about the show and the cast. Meanwhile Johnny was wandering around the apartment set, and had just climbed up onto the wooden chair (next to Leonard’s armchair) and was just standing on it. The audience member looked behind him, and said, “Johnny Galecki, on a chair,” which got Johnny’s attention, and he looked up surprised and laughed, and quickly got down off the chair.

In the scene with Penny and Leonard, Kaley messed up her lines a couple of times, and then on one take choked on the mac and cheese she was tasting.

Between takes in the comic book store, Kunal was dancing around a lot to the music that’s played for the audience.

Jim had some trouble with some of his lines in scene 7, and at one point it elicited an “awww” from the audience. And then people laughed, I think at how silly it was to awww.

Oh! And right before the cast was introduced in the beginning, we got a glimpse of them behind the curtains, and the cast was all jumping up and down in a huddle. It was adorable.
You're more than that. Fitz♥Simmons
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Last edited by ennaxor; 09-28-2011 at 10:45 AM
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