Episode 5.21 - 'Unnanmed"
Air date: 10 May 2005
Info taken from Sides in the Shooting Script 3/22/05
The information summarized below is taken from the 5 Sides published on 3/22/05 for 1-3rd Elders, Wise Elder, Doctor, Nurse, Man, Lloyd, Lucille, Sam, Pola, and Mikhail.
I will include context and stage descriptions where appropriate.
There is very little blacked out dialog and Stage Direction..
- Characters:
1-3rd Elders - Stars Hollow Elders
Wise Elder - Senior of the Stars Hollow Elders
Doctor - A Doctor (man) at the Hospital
Nurse - Nurse attending Sookie in the Maternity Ward
Man - A man at the Stamford Eagle-Gazette
Lloyd - Accountant with Mitchum at the Stamford Eagle-Gazette
Lucille - A 30 year old bohemian looking Arts Editor at the Stamford Eagle-Gazette
Sam - Older man at the Stamford Eagle-Gazette
Pola - 16 year old Russian Ballerina
Mikhail - Russian man
Editor Note: A fragment of Scene 3 is picked up in progress and ends on the top of the page. The end of the scene is between Luke, Kirk, and Lorelai.
Interior - Location Uknown - Day (Day 2) - Scene 3 -
Editor Note: The Scene is in progress and we are seeing the very end of it.
Stage Direction: Luke sighs and goes over to Kirk.
Luke tells Kirk to show him the penny.
Stage Direction: Lorelai studies the picture on the cover of the magazine. It pleases her.
End of Scene 3
Interior Stamford Eagle-Gazette/Newsroom - Same Day (Day 2) - Scene 4 -
Stage Direction: Rory comes off the elevator, with much purpose. She is in the middle of dropping things off and picking things up. Others are pretty busy as she works her way through different areas, making her rounds. She passes three guys.
Rory says Hi! to Al, Pete, and Lance.
Stage Direction: She meets up with someone almost immediately, holds something out for him.
Rory says that this has to go to Metro, ASAP.
Stage Direction: The person takes something from her and carries on. Charlie comes by.
Charlie (without stopping) tells Rory that is she sees Patel to tell him that he is looking for him.
Rory tells him that she has the word.
Stage Direction: She crosses up to the open door of a room with four guys of various ages sitting at microfiche machines. (NOTE: these machines are already in the room I'm referring to.) She sets something in their "IN" basket, which is located just inside the door.
Rory continues on telling them that she needs them back by four.
A Man tells her - "Thanks beautiful."
Rory a bit flustered says - "Manners, boys."
Stage Direction: She moves on, approaching someone at a cubicle.
Editor Note: Scene 4 continues for some length.
End of Casting Side for The Man character.
Editor Note: Scene 10 is picked up in progress at what is obviously the Maternity Ward of the Hospital. From the next scene we know the timeframe is Episode Day 4.
Interior Hospital/Maternity Ward - Continuous - Day (Day 4) - Scene 10 -
Editor Note: The scene is in progress and jackson is talking to Sookie.
Jackson is telling Sookie that this happened last time, when she went into labor. She thinking she was seeing famous people.
Sookie says "right" and to Lorelai "Suddenly my midwife was Wolf Blitzer."
Lorelai ask Sookie if she wants her to unpack her stuff.
The Nurse says that Lorelai probably doesn't need to. They have everything that Sookie needs all set up.
Jackson chimes in that they always pack a suitcase. It is useless. He asks Sookie if she has been thinking about names. Jackson says he is leaning towards Warren if it's a boy, Glenda if it's a girl. He likes Martha, too. And Rupert for a boy.
Sookie tells him that they're all good.
Jackson says that whatever they don't use, they'll use for the next one, right?
Sookie is less than enthusiastic, "Right...right, the next one."
Jackson asks Lorelai to stay with her - he has to call the mulch delivery guys and let them know what is happening.
Lorelai says she'll be here.
Stage Direction: jackson exits.
Lorelai ask Sookie if she is comfortable?
Sookie tells her, "I am, Penelope Cruz."
Editor note: There is a break in the Casting Sides for one page. Scene 10 picks up still in progress.
Lorelai is asking Sookie how soon was the Norman Mailer revelation moment after she and jackson conceived?
Sookie says she doesn't know...a few weeks.
Lorelai asks, "It was weeks?"
Sookie says she thinks so.
Lorelai continues on this track asking Sookie - you didn't know before? Not a feeling or anything?
Sookie says she doesn't know and asks you've had one before, don't you remember?
Lorelai comes back with, "It's been a while."
Sookie asks her why is she asking?
Lorelai says she doesn't know. The Maternity Ward makes her wonder about these things.
Stage Direction: The Nurse comes back in.
The Nurse says that they need to check her blood pressure. It'll be a couple of minutes.
Lorelai acknowledges, "Oh, sure. (to Sookie sotto-voce) She looks like Marlo Thomas."
Sookie tells her that see, it's not just me.
Lorelai says she'll just be outside.
Stage Direction: The Nurse closes the curtain around Sookie's bed. Lorelai exits.
End of Casting Side for The Nurse
End of Scene 10
Interior Hospital/Outer Area - Continuous - Day (Day 4) - Scene 11 -
Stage Direction: People mill about, doctors and nurses work as Lorelai comes out of Sookie's room. She seems agitated. A Doctor is coming down the hallway towards her.
Lorelai says "Excuse me, Doctor?"
The Doctor pauses - "Yes?"
Lorelai asks "You're not off to save a life, are you?"
The Doctor says not at the moment.
Lorelai says she has a quick question...Um...Pregnancy Tests? What's the deal with them now?
The Doctor says they are more accurate now. The process is similar.
Lorelai continues with - "Well, let's say you do it...have sex, you know...How soon after that can a test tell anything?
The Doctor says at least two weeks.
Lorelai - Not two days?
The Doctor tells her it won't be definitive after just two days.
Lorelai quips, "So, you got the Sword of Damocles hovering over you for at least a couple of weeks there, huh?"
The Doctor come back with - Pretty much.
Lorelai is on a ramble now - Home tests are tricky too. Can't buy one where I live, or people will see. And Talk. It's a small town. Even afterwards, the garbage man could see the box in the trash and blab. I like my garbage man, but again, it's a small town. Not your problem. So, there's no machine.
The Doctor looks questioningly - Machine?
Lorelai is really going - A machine you can stick me in here? I mean, you guys are putting pig vessels in people. Isn't there a machine that can tell right away? Away from the prying eyes of the garbage man?
The Doctor patiently tells her - You really just need to wait and take the test at the proper time.
Lorelai charges on - Okay, see, I'm eating an apple. Normally, not a sign of anything except hunger, but I don't eat much fruit. I should, but I just don't have a hankering for it, you know? had it when I was pregnant with my first kid, though. Kept craving those apples. And this morning, boy was I craving an apple.
The Doctor tells her that could be a sign.
Lorelai in a bit of a panic - It could?
The Doctor - Or not.
Lorelai finishes up - Okay, you're nice. You're sweet. I've taken up too much of you time. Thanks you.
The Doctor tells her - No problem.
End of Casting Side for The Doctor
Editor Note: Scene 11 may continue for a bit.
Editor Note: Scene 12 is picked up in progress. Lorelai is still in the Outer Area of the hospital on her Cell phone talking to Emily.
Interior Hospital/Outer Area - Continuous - Day (Day 4) - Scene 12 -
Editor Note: The scene is in progress. Lorelai is talking to Emily on her Cell phone. Presumably, the scene will be Intercut between Lorelai and Emily. The character Pola is the 16 year old Russian Ballerina.
Lorelai is telling Emily she is glad and asking what's up?
Emily tells her that Pola wandered into her room looking for the bathroom. She doesn't know left from right. And she found an old toy of Lorelai's, the Magic Eight Ball...
Lorelai is surprised that it was still there.
Emily tells her it was in some drawer. That Pola is mesmerized by it. She has been playing with it ever since, asking it questions...She won't put it down. Emily was wondering if she can let Pola keep it.
Lorelai tells her - Sure.
Emily says it is practically glued to her hand.
Lorelai snarks to her Mom - Whatever Pola wants, Pola gets.
Emily says Good, Thank you.
Stage Direction: In the background, Pola claps and laughs at some response the Magic Eight Ball gave her.
Pola (in Russian) - "It is yes! Yes! - A lot of money is coming my way!"
Emily tells Lorelai - "I just want to hug the stuffing out of her. You'll meet her tomorrow night at dinner."
Lorelai says she is looking forward to it.
Emily says Bye and thanks Lorelai again.
Lorelai - Bye, Mom
Stage Direction: They hang up. We stay on Lorelai. She crosses to another area of the waiting area and dials her phone.
End of Casting Side for Pola
Editor Note: Scene 12 may continue for a bit.
Interior Stamford Eagle-Gazette/Boardroom - Later - Night (Night 5) - Scene 19 -
Stage Direction: A dozen or so wired, tired, challenged Eagle-Gazette editors and department heads sit around the table spit-balling. Sleeves are rolled up, pencils are behind ears, jackets have been removed. Mitchum presides at the head of the table, as a first amongst equals -- he's got his jacket off, too, his sleeves rolled up. Rory sits next to and just behind Mitchum, notebook in hand, enthralled by the meeting. Amongst the assembled is harry, Charlie, and older guy named Sam, an accountant named lloyd, a 30 year-old bohemian-looking, string-willed arts editor named Lucille, and others.
Sam is asking how interested the Stamford residents are in arts coverage of a city forty miles away.
Lucille says - They're interested...
Sam counters with it takes resources away from covering local events.
Lucille (finishing his sentence for him) - "That are less interesting than the events taking place in New York City..."
Sam continues with - If they're that interesting, we'll send our own Calendar staffers. Freelancers are a pain in the butt.
Lucille pipes up - "So, Franz Ferdinand comes to New York, forget freelancers, you'll go cover it."
Sam arguing - "I didn't say that. And who's he?"
Stage Direction: Several at the table chuckle good-naturedly.
Harry quips - "'He's' a band."
Sam - "Watch it, pisher."
Mitchum remarks - "Even I knew that, Sam."
Sam pleads for Mitchum to arbitrate.
Mitchum says - "And spoil the fun? No way."
Sam, a bit out out - It's your money.
Lucille says it is money well spent.
Lloyd reminds her that it is not her money.
Mitchum says to everyone - Look, keep the system as is. We don't even have office space for extra people, let alone the budget. Go to the universities, Yale, whatever, get volunteers to pick up what our staff can't cover. Those kids would jump at the chance.
Harry says that he'll pick up some slack.
Sam quips right after you pick up my dry cleaning, right?
Stage Direction: More chuckles.
Harry says he'll pick that up too.
Mitchum tells Harry not to let them push him around.
Charlie comes in with are we going to end this marathon before we get to subscriptions? Please say No.
Sam snarks - Charlie's feeling neglected again.
Mitchum asks Charlie where they are with the sales department?
Charlie tells him that have abundant turnover. They have to start paying more.
Mitchum groans as if in pain.
Lucille quips that got the boss where it hurts.
Mitchum asks if it's minimum wage plus twenty percent commission?
Charlie chimes in and all the stale pastry they can eat.
Mitchum tells him to up it to thirty
Lloyd groans now - Okay, now I'm in pain.
Mitchum tells Lloyd to crunch the numbers first and get them to him. He never goes behind the back of Captain Crunch.
LLoyd tells Charlie that they'll get together on Monday.
Mitchum addresses them all - Let's all resume this on Monday. Go home, meet your kids, feed your dogs. have a good one.
Stage Direction: Several respond with goodbyes and goodnights to each other as they all get up to leave. Rory stays behind as people file out.
Rory remarks that was fun.
Mitchum tells her that is the way those things should go. Give and take. The less he says the better.
Rory asks if she can get him anything?
End of Casting Sides for Sam, Lloyd, and Lucille.
Editor Note: Scene 19 may continue for a bit.
Editor Note: Scene 21 begins Act Four with FADE IN:
Interior Steam Room - Night (Night 5) - Scene 21 -
Stage Direction: We come up close on Like, dressed as he normally is -- cap, Pendleton. He looks annoyed as he listens to Kirk going on and on about about his right to have the Twickham House. We're not quite sure where we are right now, but there probably is some steam in the vicinity.
Kirk (from off-screen) - "He had no contract. he had nothing in writing. Granted, his offer matched the fair market value of the property, but it was a rigged bid situation. The house wasn't even officially listed for sale."
Stage Direction: As the camera readjusts, we discover we are in a steam room. Kirk, in a towel, stands before four guys sitting on benches, also in towels. Off to the side is Taylor, also in a towel. One of the Elder's faces is completely obscured by the towel and we never see his face.
Taylor tell Kirk that is was not a rigged bid.
Kirk says that is for the courts to decide.
The First Elder tells Kirk to get to the point.
Kirk says the house should be re-listed. They should take the best offer from the person with the best chance of securing financing. And that person is him.
The First Elder says All right, then he turns and asks Luke -- what do you have to say to that?
Luke somewhat pissed - "What the hell are we doing in a steam room?"
Taylor explains - Luke, I explain to you that if you wanted to see he town elders, you had to do it on their terms.
Luke says that this is ridiculous. He can't think in here.
The Second Elder tells him he could strip and get in a towel.
Editor Note: The Second Elder has obviously been reading some of the Luke Threads on various boards.
Luke grumps that he is not getting in a towel.
Kirk snarks that he thinks Luke has body issues.
Luke still pissed says he does not have body issues. He is just not agreeing with what's going on, how it's going on...
Kirk addressing the Town Elders. - "I don't think it's appropriate for the defendant to address you in this tome, it it?"
Luke impatiently tells Kirk - "I'm not a defendant, Kirk. This isn't a court. it's not even a room. It's a box full of hot air."
Kirks (to the Elders) - Now he is insulting you.
Luke to the Elders - Listen, old guys, I should get the house...
The Third Elder cautions Luke to watch your manners, young man.
Luke starts - I can get a loan
Kirk interrupts - "But I've got deep pockets. Not now, I mean, right now, I'm naked. But my pants have pockets."
Luke gets in (to the Elders) - Who are you guys, anyway? I've never seen any of you around. What gives you the authority to make town decisions?
The First Elder instructs - The Town Elders have always been a part of the administrative life of this town.
Luke says maybe that should change.
Taylor tells Luke that that isn't helping.
Kirk tries to snark - "He's a hothead with body issues."
Luke tells them that it isn't right. He and Taylor had an agreement.
Kirk is still trying - "He needs therapy and probably pills."
Stage Direction: Unexpectedly, the quiet Elder whose face we cannot see speaks up, in a calm, soothing voice.
The Wise Elder - "Luke should get the house."
A surprised Luke - What?
Kirk - What?
The Wise Elder continues - "It is the right thing to do. Kirk may have better claim technically but Luke wants it more."
Kirk - But
The Wise Elder continuing - "I knew Luke's father. His grandfather."
The First Elder adds - "We all did."
The Wise Elder is finishing up - "He'll care for the house, because he cares so much about it. He wants it for him and Loreali..."
Luke - "For me and --" (to Taylor) "Did you --?"
Stage Direction: Taylor shakes his head 'no'.
The Wise Elder remarks to all - "We all watched him as he pined away for Lorelai for nine long years. He waited for her through her many relationships. he won her. Now he wants this for her. And for the others..."
Luke looks puzzled - "Others? What others?"
The Wise Elder tells him - "You'll bring children into the house..."
Kirk grasping for anything - "I'll bring children into the house, too. Maybe not my own..."
The Wise Elder completes his speech - "It's right for Luke to have it. Kirk is young. There will be other places for him to go. That's what I think."
Stage Direction: A beat as the group takes this in.
The Third Elder - "Well, I agree."
The Second Elder - "Me, too."
The First Elder - "Luke should get the house."
Kirk childishly - "Rip!"
Luke very sincere - "Thank you" (to the Wise Elder) "Thank You. Sir."
Stage Direction: The Wise Elder just nods. Luke looks satisfied.
Kirk switching gears says to Luke that it's got a big yard. A lot of lawn. Kirk wonders if they can talk about him and his gardening services.
Stage Direction: Luke exits.
Kirk continues to ramble saying he has his own tools.
Stage Direction: Kirk exits.
End of Casting Sides for 1st to 3rd Elder, and The Wise Elder.
End of Scene 21
Interior Gilmore House/Living Room - Later - Night (Night 5) - Scene 22 -
Stage Direction: Lorelai, Emily, and Mikhail sit together, having drinks. Lorelai looks a little distracted.
Mikhail addressing Emily - "Smilovici."
Emily trying to pronounce it - "Smilovici."
Mikhail says again for her - "Smilovici."
Emily says she thought she knew an Italian man named Smilovici and asks if that is possible.
Mikhail tells her he doesn't know.
Emily babbles on - all those styrofoam peanuts you see in packages...he made those.
Mikhail says thats fantastic.
Emily asks Mikhail where his small town of Smilovici is.
Mikhail tells her that it is outside of Minsk.
Emily says it sounds wonderful.
Mikhail tells her that people die very young there.
Emily somewhat breezily - Oh, well that doesn't sound so good. She turns to Lorelai and asks what's in the bag?
Lorelai is still distracted - "Hmmm?"
Emily says to her that she has be clutching that bag all night, what's in it.
Mikhail asks if she has a mystery bag.
Emily jumps at that - a mystery bag. yes. To Lorelai she asks what's in the mystery bag.
Lorelai sighs - "Oh, well..."
Stage Direction: Lorelai takes several copies of "American Travel" out of the bag.
Lorelai a bit hesitantly tell her - "This...is my cover story."
Emily enthusiastically - Your cover story! I thought it wasn't coming out for two weeks. Well, let me see that."
Lorelai - Okay.
Emily takes the magazine to Mikhail and tells him that Lorelai owns an inn and asks what would you call it maybe? A Dacha?
Mikhail - confirms a dacha, yes.
Emily shows him the magazine cover and tells him - "This is it."
Mikhail continues to chant - Fantastic.
Lorelai thanks him.
Mikhail says - Great dacha, this dacha.
Emily asks Lorelai if there are other pictures with the article.
Lorelai tells her that there are and to go ahead and read it. There is time before dinner, right?
Emily says that they can't start dinner until Rory gets there and turn to Mikhail and tells him that he is going to love her granddaughter. "You'll just want to pick her up and throw her in the air."
Emily continues and tells Lorelai to give one to Mikhail. It is how he is learning English.
Lorelai says there are plenty to go around.
Stage Direction: Lorelai gives a copy to Mikhail. Emily has opened hers up to the article.
Emily comments - Oh, gorgeous.
Lorelai tells her yes.
Stage Direction: Beat, as Emily reads. Lorelai watches her, uncomfortably.
Emily tells her it is a rave.
Lorelai says that they got lucky.
End of Casting Side for Mikhail Part 1.
Editor Note: Scene 22 continues for some period.
Editor Note: We pick up Scene 23 in progress. The location is as in Scene 22. The scene has Lorelai, Emily, and Mikhail.
Interior Gilmore House/Exact Location Unknown - Continuous - Night (Night 5) - Scene 23 -
Editor Note: The scene is in progress and picks up between Emily and Lorelai.
Emily from off-screen says in a resigned voice - I'll stop reading.
Lorelai asks - "And we won't talk about it again? Ever?"
Emily (still off-screen) says Fine and to come out.
Stage Direction: Lorelai unlocks the door. Emily is there.
Emily tells Lorelai that they should go back to the living room.
Lorelai tells her Mom Thank you.
Stage Direction: Behind them we see Mikhail step up, in the process of putting on his coat. He looks upset.
Mikhail says Goodbye to Emily.
Emily very puzzled asks Mikhail. Where are you going?
Mikhail tell her he must leave!.
Stage Direction: He stalks toward the door.
Emily - "Leave? Why?" she goes after him. "Mikhail!"
Stage Direction: Emily chases after him.
End of all Casting Sides for Mikhail
End of Scene 23
Exterior Connecticut Harbor - Night (Night 5) - Scene 24 -
Stage Direction: Boats line a walkway that leads down to a decent sized yacht. Logan's sister's engagement party is in full swing. People, mostly in their mid to late twenties, are gather on the dock alongside the boat, and several can be seen on the boat, drinking and chatting. Rory makes her way down the dock and heads toward the boat. She spots Logan on the boat talking to a girl. he spots her at the same time. Rory's in a weird mood.
Logan to Rory in a pleased voice - "Hey -- you're here. Early."
Editor Note: There is a break of 4 pages of script in scene 24. We pick it up right at the end.
Rory says - "Let's go Huntzberger."
Logan confirms - "Let's go."
Stage Direction: Logan and Rory head toward the boat.
End of Scene 24
Interior Gilmore House/Living Room - Same Time - Night (Night 5) - Scene 25 -
Stage Direction: Emily looks on, a serious look on her face, as Lorelai addresses a hurt-looking Mikhail.
Lorelai is in full monologue mode - "See, I was mad at mom -- Mrs. Gilmore, here -- at the time, and I ended up saying things that I shouldn't have said. Because, you see, normally, I don't make jokes about Stalin. They're in appropriate. I just said it in jest to the writer and she printed it.
Looking at Emily Lorelai continues - "She is not Josef Stalin. And not that this is an excuse, but there's no way I could have know a Russian man whose entire family and their village was killed by Stalin would be reading this. In front of me. There's just no way."
Emily talking to Mikhail - "She has this off-putting sense of humor, Mikhail. You'd know that if you spent time with her."
Lorelai confirms - "Yes, you would. You wold know that."
Mikhail considering what he has just been told - Yes...
Loreali continues - "I mean. Josef Stalin was a monster. Worse than Rommel, and he was a real putz."
Stage Direction: Lorelai's cell rings.
Lorelai pleads with Mikhail - "So please stay. You caught us on a bad day."
Mikhail is persuaded - "All right..."
Lorelai tell Emily that the cell call must be Rory.
Stage Direction: Lorelai stands and steps away from Emily and Mikhail. Emily talks quietly in the background, still trying to make Mikhail feel comfortable as Lorelai takes the call.
Lorelai - "Hello?
Rory (Voice Over) - "Mom?"
Lorelai says - "Hey -- when are you getting here? I really, really want you here."
Rory (Still Voice Over) - In a sheepish voice - "You need to come and get me."
Lorelai looking concerned - "Where are you?"
Stage Direction: As she listens, her concern turns to shock, as we: FADE OUT.
End of The Show
End of Casting Sides for Episode 5.21 - "Unnamed"