retro physical

jean-grey

Tftnt

Lancelot/Gwen - I don't hate them, but I'd prefer if he got more screentime/attention on his own. It feels like he's only on the show (and he's not there many times... ) to be her love interest. He's much more than that and Santiago could bring so much to the show.

Cristofle

From the last thread re: Spuffy--

Spuffy gutted Buffy. Her integrity. Her intelligence. Her freaking self-respect. I was left with nothing but a shadow of the character I'd adored. I was so excited when Buffy first aired- at the time, strong, kickass female leads were few and far between. I loved BA, but I wasn't bothered by Buffy/Riley. They didn't have a ton of chemistry, but Buffy retained her integrity and strength. Then Spuffy came along and Buffy was nothing more than another self-loathing girl who sleeps with a guy who's repeatedly tried to kill her, who uses a vile, abusive relationship to affirm the worst in herself. And the worst part was, they became so twisted it was like I was supposed to feel sorry for soulless Spike in the situation. Um, no. Buffy is, and should forever be, more important and more protected.

ashleyt

Every time I hear "poor Spike" I get enraged because as much as a bitch as she was, he was the one that kept pulling her back. Whenever she got the strength to leave and try to be better, he was right there telling her that she belonged in the dark with him and that she came back wrong. So what if she punched him a couple of times, he sat there and took it because according to Spike that's a form of affection Yeah, if you're psychotic. SB in S6 is not a love story it's the horror of obsession and emotional manipulation.

BA4eva

Beautiful post. ICA. I just cannot fathom this relationship or the fact that theyre considered a couple

ICA

Cristofle

I never feel sorry for Spike, especially in S6. HE HAD NO SOUL. Literally. No soul. He knew what kind of a state she was in and he used it to get what he wanted, no matter what the cost to her. Because- you guessed it- he HAD NO SOUL.

And his insta-soul in S7 was such a cop-out, such a weak way out of the mess that had been created in S6, so I didn't care about that Spike either. Spuffy ruined Spike too, he was far better before he started mooning over her. But Buffy matters more, so her gutting is what really infuriates me.

The_Void

I've been away a while. Need to get some hate out of my system. I'm just about to post my top 7 couples over at the Couples of the Moment thread, so here let’s have a look at 7 truly horrible couples.

7. Arthur/Gwen (Merlin)



Seriously, where the hell did these two come from? They barely interacted at all, hardly a word spoken between them for a whole series, then they’re roomies for half an episode and all of a sudden epic romance? What? No, seriously, what? Not to mention that they had to completely change Gwen’s character in order to make it work, and pretend that Merlin and Morgana weren’t already the ones who kept Arthur in check, so that Gwen could be the only person to do that. And it’s just bizarre that in S1, Merlin/Gwen and Arthur/Morgana were pretty obviously being set up, only for both to be completely dropped in S2 with no mentions or explanations whatsoever. It’s like the writers started doing something different than being boring and following the legends, but then deciding it was just easier to do what had already been done.


6. Ted/Robin (How I Met Your Mother)



It’s hard to think of a more yawn-worthy couple. Their incessant moaning and moping, the ridiculous back-and-forth crushing and inevitably doomed romance... it got old by the second episode. The fact is, they just don’t fit. They want different things out of life, he’s an old romantic while she’s a cynic who doesn’t want any of that schmaltzy stuff – unless of course a vet tells her she does, therefore she must start wanting that because obviously all women want the same thing, and to think that having a blue orchestra in your front room is ridiculous means you are overly cynical and scared of commitment. Blech.

5. Buffy/Angel (Buffy the Vampire Slayer)



I’ll let Cordy and Wes field this one.

“ Oh, Angel, I know that I am a Slayer, and you're a vampire and it would be impossible for us to be together, but—“
“ But... my gypsy curse sometimes prevents me from seeing the truth. Oh, Buffy...”
“ Yes, Angel?”
“ I love you so much, I almost forgot to brood!”
“ And just because I sent you to Hell that one time doesn't mean that we can't just be friends.”
“ Or possibly more?”
“ Gasp! No! We mustn't!”
“ Kiss me!”
“Bite me!”
“How 'bout you both bite me?”

Their “OMGSOEPICETERNALLOVE” was somewhere between painful to sit through, and lolworthy. “When you kiss me I want to die” – who writes that crap? And as the very idea of “love at first sight” fills me with an overwhelming urge to roll my eyes, it was hard work imagining that their love was anything more than baseless infatuation-cum-obsession. Remember, 16 year old hormones and a major Lolita Complex do not soulmates make.

4. Buffy/Spike (Buffy the Vampire Slayer)



These two have the copyright on the word “Eww”. S6 is where the real squick lies. It starts with Spike beating Buffy up, mocking and verbally torturing her, telling her she’s “wrong”, through the two of them having anatomically improbable sex on balconies and behind fast food joints (how romantic) while he emotionally manipulates here, tells her that she’s a monster that belongs in the dark, and ends with Buffy screaming on her bathroom floor as Spike attempts to force himself on her. Not that Spike is the only bad guy here, as Buffy returns the favour by regularly beating him up and telling him that he is beneath her. Lovely.
And then we have S7, where apparently their love blossoms out of the darkness or something like that. To be honest, all I saw was Buffy being awkward around Spike for one episode before the whole rape business was swept under the carpet, hand-waved away with “oh, he has a soul now”, and all of a sudden Buffy has “seen his penance” (Babbling in a basement for 3 weeks? That was his penance?) and apparently is “still in love with Spike” (Why did it have to be “still”? There’s no way she could’ve fallen in love in S6). And of course the writers have to show that Buffy cares about Spike by acting like she doesn’t care about anyone else – see her going to Spike’s aid over Xander in First Date (where Xander is bleeding on the floor, having received a knife to the gut, and Spike has a split lip) and Dawn in Lies My Parents Told Me (where Dawn has been crushed underneath a metal bed, and Spike has a headache). Not to forget everything that happened in “Empty Places” and LMPTM. I care a hella lot more about the Buffy/Giles/Xander/Willow bond than I do about any ship and I do not appreciate their ties being destroyed to make room for BS (hey, guess what that stands for).

3. Harry/Ginny (Harry Potter)



These two are just ridiculous. As far as couples go, they are the perfect example of telling and not showing. For 5 years, Harry regarded her with little more attention than he would give a table lamp. Then, out of the blue, BAM, he’s in love with her. No build-up, just bam. What happened? Was it just because she grew boobs? It can’t have been because of her coming out of her shell, because she had already done that a year before, and Harry still hadn’t given her a second thought until he saw her kissing Dean (love that his feelings are borne out of jealousy and a desire to “rip Dean limb from limb” by the way, real romantic that). They have a grand total of one one-on-one conversation in all books prior to his “realisation”, and a grand total of two afterwards (in which they break up). In place of them actually talking about anything important, ever, we got “sunlit days” – no, wait, scratch that – we got vague references to sunlit days. Apparently JKR, with all her talk about how Harry and Ginny are “soulmates”, decided that H/G weren’t important enough to dedicate any page-time to at all. Their entire relationship was summarised in the space of one paragraph. And yet somehow they were annoyingly intrusive... possibly because while they didn’t have any actual interaction, a stupid amount of time was spent explaining how Harry was creepily staring at stalking masturbating to thinking about Ginny.
I haven’t even started on how offensive the relationship is to Ginny. In Bk 5, Ginny grows up, gets over Harry and becomes more independent... but then in Book 6 all her character development is retconned away, as we discover that she never got over Harry, and everything she did since was designed to ensnare Harry. And why exactly does Ginny want to be with Harry anyway? She’s a feisty girl who hates being treated like she’s helpless, she wants to be respected and considered an equal – yet Harry treats her like a fragile piece of china – he breaks up with her “for her own good”, forbids her from fighting in the Battle of Hogwarts – and for some reason this “feisty” young woman rolls over and accepts it. I know Harry means well and it’s totally in character for him to want to protect her, but the fact is Ginny doesn’t want someone who will protect her, that’s not what she needs in a partner. Let’s not forget about how Harry completely forgets the most traumatic thing to ever happen to her. Basically, Ginny was turned from being a potentially interesting character to a personality-less husk whose sole purpose is to bear Harry’s children (who are all named after people Harry knows... “equals” my left buttock).

2. Buffy/Riley (Buffy the Vampire Slayer)



There are three main problems with this couple. First of all - “boring” is the buzzword here. I mean I hate Spuffy and Bangel, but at least there was conflict there, some element of drama. With Briley there’s just... nothing. They just stand there, and then they date. Riley turns out to be working for a secret agency, but in the end that means very little – the two of them just plod along until everybody gets bored and they break up. Second thing, they have not an ounce of anything resembling chemistry or any kind of rapport. Every time they are together onscreen, all life is sucked out of the scene, leaving a hollow shell of entertainment. Secondly - Riley is, as the French say, a massive tosser. He is patronising, insecure, misogynistic, controlling, self-absorbed... while Buffy’s mother is in hospital with brain cancer, and Buffy has just discovered that her sister isn’t real and an insane hellgod wants to kill her, Riley is off getting suckjobs from vampire hookers and whining that Buffy isn’t paying him enough attention. Then he had the nerve to blame Buffy for what he had done, and give her a stupid ultimatum. Then I could’ve imagined that his helicopter crashed into the side of a mountain if he hadn’t then come back a year later with the most annoying wife anyone has ever had. I hate Riley; I hate their lame-ass, chemistry-less, death-defyingly dull relationship.


But as for the ultimate fail, the most squick-inducing pairing anyone could ever conceive, it can be no-one other than...



Connor/Cordelia

Kyls

With Merlin/Gwen, I'm fairly sure that it was just always supposed to be a one-sided crush kind of thing. Someone was explaining to Colin before they filmed the pilot, that Merlin didn't see her that way, he saw her as a buddy. So I don't think that was actually going anywhere, but they did move on quite suddenly.

Artemis

The_Void, I love you. I agree with everything but Buffy/Riley. And Robin/Ted, but only because I don't watch HIMYM.

So much effing YES YES YES to your Arthur/Gwen explanation. And Harry/Ginny? Jo, you FAIL at writing romance. Honestly, the FIRST thing they teach you in a writing class is SHOW, DON'T TELL!

mylu

ღfaithfully

Lucas/Peyton
Liam/Annie
Finn/Quinn
Harry/Ginny
Jacob/Bella
Puck/Rachel
Jesse/Rachel
Finn/Anyone that's not Rachel
Rachel/Anyone that's not Finn
Ezra/Aria
Dan/Serena
Nate/Serena
Ryan/Taylor
Any ship on The OC other than Ryan/Marissa and Seth/Summer
Annie/Life
Peyton/Life
Jacob/Life
Serena/Life

mylu

i agree on some

MelanieErdelyi

The_Void I agree so much. Execpt about Buffy/Spike as they are my OTP but whatever.

And I love your use of David Tennat animations. *fan-girl-squee*

My list:

Buffy/Angel
Buffy/Riley
Veronica/Duncan
Veronica/Piz
Cordy/Connor
Buffy/Xander
Willow/Kennedy
Kennedy/Life
Gossip Girl/Existence
Glee/Writers
Finn/Rachel
Quinn/Puck
Will/Emma
Dawson/Joey
Doctor/Amy
Doctor/River - WTF?
Sebastian/Annette
Harry/Ginny
Noel/Aria

And now to anger people most likely:

Twilight/Existence - I get why everyone who likes it does. Really. But for me, it just doesn't do it.

sellie_girl

Jossverse Style:
Buffy/Angel. (Season 3)
Buffy/Xander (only seasons 1-2 though. I actually like the concept of them getting together after the finale)
Willow/Xander.
Willow/Kennedy.
Xander/Cordy.
Cordy/Connor. (Just plain ol nasty)
Fred/Gunn.
Angel/Nina. (Not even a relationship, come on.)

DiBye23

I agree with everything you said. Season 6 was terrible to both Spike and Buffy as characters. And season 7 rushed any chance of them fixing what they had broken. Buffy treated him okay for a total of like 5 episodes or something stupid like that. And he was reduced to either A) A manipulative pig (while he had no soul) or B) A love sick idiot (with a soul). It was terrible for both characters.