WildRose

I think it depends on how you define 'sacrifice'. I mean, it's corny but in relationship, as in life people sacrifice all the time.
Both Brian and Justin never had a major relationship before, both of them brought their own personalities, fears, needs and wants to the 'table' (even though some of those needs were not always expressed out loud ) (Justin ) but I think it wasn't a one sided rode.

And as for Justin being the more active partner during his relationship with Brian- well, during most of S2 Brian did quite a lot, and not just because Justin was bashed plus I think that even during the time Justin was with Ethan he (Justin ) was the one who carried the relationship forward.

Manu9

Personally, I think some sacrifice is needed in a relationship, to make it work. Then that sacrifice can be big or small, meaningful or harmless, but it's part of a relationship most of the times. I think what Justin and Brian mean when they say that sacrificing yourself is not love, is giving up all of what you are, your dreams and your personality. But give up part of you to be in a relationship, I think that's normal and it's more compromise than sacrifice.

WildRose

I agree, but then when Justin entered that 'rebound' relationship with Ethan he actually sacrificed parts of himself , and not in a good way, like when he started to dress, talk, and even think the same way as Ethan, which meant he started to lose himself in this relationship.

galesgirl645

I think Justin dressed the way he wanted to I don't know if he started thinking the way Ethan wanted him to think...

WildRose

Actually I think it was around mid S3 where we see Justin wearing those black turtle necks, with Ethan's friends...
To me it seemed as though Justin was just trying too hard. (But I guess it's for the S3 thread )

Manu9

I replied to this on the S3 thread. But I really think Justin never tried to be like Ethan, he just lived a different phase of his life and tried different things.

galesgirl645

In season 2 Brian and Justin didn't know the word compromise.

WildRose

I agree it was a phase Justin had to go through, but I think it was mostly because he tried to convince himself that's the way he wants to live his life, when in reality it wasn't exactly the case. At that point he was pbbly too caught up in his romantic love story to notice that's not what he needs to be happy.

Manu9

To be honest though, Justin always wanted certain things. Romanticism, the words, a committment, those were all things that Justin gave up for a long while but they were things he wanted and liked, deep down.

WildRose

I'm not saying he wasn't allowed to have romantic dreams, but I think that up until 216 Brian was showing Justin how much he loved him and cared for him in more ways then one, and Justin knew that, but it was also a point in his life when he lost his confidence and was even a bit lost (after the bashing ) that he gradually lost sight of that, and felt he needed more, so after the bday surprise and Vermont, it was a bit too much for him to handle.

Manu9

I think deep down Justin always needed more. He learnt to do without certain things because it was the only way to be with Brian and ultimately Brian showed him he loved him in other ways, but those needs were always there in Justin and at times they resurfaced. The post bashing time was a difficult one for Justin so I think then more than ever he needed those things.

galesgirl645

He was so lost in season 2

WildRose

I think that when we talk about the things Justin gave up to be with Brian we also have to remember that first of all he was still really young, and it was the first major relationship he ever had, with a man that never had any major relationship either, so it was sort of a mutual journey for both of them, and even if it seemed like he was giving up on certain things there was still a long way to go for both of them.

Justin was definitely lost and confused in S2, but overall I think he gained a lot from Brian, and from what they had between them for the most part , up until 216.

Manu9

I agree that he received a lot from Brian untill the last part of S2. I don't think anyone can deny that. But there are things that Justin always wanted and that never changed, it wasn't a matter of age. He always wanted and always will want some romance and the words and the committment. He learnt to do without at times, but the desire for those was always there, when he was young and when he was older.

WildRose

That's what I like about Justin
I'm not sure he found that during his affair with Ethan, though. Maybe at first, but not later on.