Mysteria

PhoenixRising

Thanks for topping the next episode watch, Crystal! I'll recap as soon as I can! Probably on my next day off this week.

☆♥~Buffyverse_Lover16~♥☆

I wish I was Mary in this episode

PhoenixRising

I'm definitely doing my recap today. When I wake up in the morning.

☆♥~Buffyverse_Lover16~♥☆

Mary was lucky.

PhoenixRising

Okay, my PC was down this morning, so I'll have to do it when I get home from work.

PhoenixRising

Sorry, PC issues again. I'm going to do my recap right now. Let me get my DVD in....

Okay, I'm ready to start Mary The Paralegal!

Flashback to three months earlier. Ted's going over how Victoria is perfect because she likes the same CD that he does. Didn't he say that Robin was perfect because she could quote lines from Ghostbusters? Ted, stop comparing women to that stupid list of qualifications, already!

Robin's been nominated for a local area media award. You can see that the gang is totally enthused about it. She wants them all to come...... there's an open bar.

Ted had a feeling that Victoria was going to be around for a long time. Well, that didn't last long. Now Ted feels that he shouldn't go given that Robin's still mad at him over the Victoria thing.

I love how Barney basically sums up Ted's entire screw up with Robin and Victoria. Because Ted just saying "y'know" wasn't good enough.

Marshall thinks that Ted should go, just to show that he and Robin are still friends and that he supports her. And Barney suggests Ted bring a date who's hotter than Robin, naturally. And bigger boobs.

Barney suggested that Ted get an escort/prostitution?

Marshall just lawyered Barney by showing him that if fisherman traded fish for sex, then fisherman were actually an older profession than prostitutes. Ka-Boom! You've been lawyered!

Barney is serious about getting Ted a hooker. One out of every eight women is a prostitute? Really Barney?

Barney intentionally borrowed Ted's glass of water just so he could spit it out after learing that Ted's been celibate for 57 days since he broke up with Victoria. Ted's not in a slump, he's on a hiatus.

This is when Barney suggests that Ted take Mary, a lady who lives in Barney's apartment building to the awards ceremony. Of course she's not a prostitute, but Ted doesn't know that.

Oh please, Barney!

Poor Lily is exhausted. She's taking naps when her kindergarten students are napping? Should she do that?

Robin wants to bring a date and Lily thinks she's trying to make Ted jealous. That's totally not weird..... yeah, it's weird.

Hello, Mary! Haaaaaave you met Ted? Damn, she's hot!

Ted, she's not a hooker! She's way too hot to be a hooker!

Barney is so full of it. He's claiming to have paid $500 for Mary. And he wants Ted to make Robin jealous.

Ted and Marshall are having one of their telepathic conversations again. It's about Robin's date for the evening. Sandy Rivers!

OMG, Sandy is a terrible news anchor. He just reads articles from the newspaper on the air.

Lily and Robin are about to meet Mary. Marshall is so awkward here.

So now it's Ted and Mary vs. Robin and Sandy.

Vampire Lou hosts the Saturday afternoon Kung Fu movie? Lily says it makes no sense. Marshall is wiping his mouth after hearing that Lily borrowed Mary's lipstick.

I love this scene between Alyson and her real life husband, Alexis Denisof!

So Lily's sleepy because the school took away her kids' naptime.... during which time she sleeps as well?

Mary just said the word prostitute! Only because Lily refused to sacrifice her values as a teacher for money. And of course Marshall and Ted took it the wrong way.

Barney just blurted out that Mary is a paralegal after Robin asked her what she did for a living. Barney's really trying to sell her as a hooker to Ted and Marshall. But Marshall is surprised when she accurately describes her job and her firm, which is a real firm.

Ted is flirting with her, thinking that it might not be allowed. Oh, man, Ted!

Robin just told Mary that Ted is a great guy and that she should hold on to him and not let him out of her sight...... not for a minute.

And now Ted's making fun of Sandy Rivers.

Damn, Mary just insulted someone Ted hates by referencing something he loves when she asked him if Sandy's hair reminded him of Darth Vader's helmet.

Ted and Robin are having a moment at the bar. She's asking him if he kissed her yet, or if he's waiting to be in a serious relationship with someone else first.

Ted is insisting that he didn't come there to make her jealous, just to support her as a friend.

Ted's firm built the hotel they're in, and Mary just said that it's a shame they don't have a room there..... until Barney gives them the key to one of the rooms. Man, Barney clearly doesn't know Ted or else he would never have told him that Mary was a hooker. Ted was only going to screw this up.

Why didn't Barney just tell Ted that Mary was a hot paralegal? It would've provided the same result.

I love how Marshall keeps lawyering Barney. And he's also been putting stuff in Sandy Rivers' hair and he hasn't noticed.

Robin won the award for her piece on Pickles the singing dog!

Damn, Robin left Ted out of her acceptance speech. And now she wants to get a cab with Sandy.

Ted's going upstairs with Mary. Another telepathic conversation between Ted and Marshall. And Lily is butting in on it.

Wow, all this just to make Robin jealous? And Marshall and Lily high-fived each other because of all the stuff Marshall put in Sandy's hair.

So Robin took Sandy to his cab and then went back inside because she was only trying to make Ted jealous.

Wow, Lily heard Marshall telepathically say how Mary was a prostitute?

So now Lily and Robin both think that Mary is a prostitute. This can't end well. And now Lily is wiping her mouth because she borrowed Mary's lipstick.

And now in keeping with the awards show dynamic, it's time for Barney to announce this evening's twist ending! See? This entire show is about twist endings! And Barney got Vampire Lou to read the card that said Mary's not a prostitute!

So Mary's just a paralegal who lives in Barney's apartment. And the best part? She has no idea that Ted's a hooker! Seriously, what were you thinking, Barney? You know Ted's just gonna mess this up!

Barney's like, "if you don't laugh it just seems mean." Ya think, Barney? None of them are laughing.

Oh great, and here's the part where Ted and Mary are about to close the deal.... until.....

Neither one has any clue about what the other is thinking. Ted's trying to tell her that he's never "done this before," and she thinks he's saying he's a virgin. And now she's talking about having had clients riding her all day long. Ted's really getting the wrong idea.

And here's where Ted flubs it up. He likes her a lot, but he can't do this because she's a hooker. And here it comes......

Nooooo, Ted..... she's a paralegal! Not a hooker! He still doesn't get it even after she's told him! And when he finally gets it he just looks stupid. Damn, he's blown it.

And now Ted's gonna give it to Barney. He's not amused in the slightest. Barney's saying that he did it to prove a point..... what point that was he can't really think of right now.

So Barney told him that Mary was a hooker in order to make him think she was a sure thing, and sure enough he was so confident that Mary was ready to sleep with Ted on the first date. So all Ted needs is to exude that kind of confidence all the time and his slump will be over? He thinks Ted should approach every woman he meets as if she were a whore? Nice going, Barney.

Mary slapped him and stormed off. Of course she did. He wasn't supposed to say she was a hooker.

So now Marshall thinks it was funny too, huh? Well it turns out that Ted never checked out of that fancy hotel that Barney charged on his credit card, and Ted's been amassing quite a tab, getting massages and pouring expensive champagne down the drain. So Barney's gonna get hit with a huge bill! Come on, Barney. If you don't laugh it just seems mean.

Another great episode! I can't wait for the next one, Best Prom Ever, which is one of my favorite episodes ever!

☆♥~Buffyverse_Lover16~♥☆

PhoenixRising

Aww, you did, Mary? I didn't know you shipped Ted with anyone else.

I just thought that Barney was brutal with that practical joke he pulled. Aww, if you don't laugh then it's just mean.

☆♥~Buffyverse_Lover16~♥☆

PhoenixRising

I knew you shipped Ted with both Robin and Zoey, but I didn't know you shipped him with Mary as well. But for a good reason.

Yeah, Barney really did burn Barney in the end. Charged up a lot on his card. Aww, if you don't laugh then it's just mean.

☆♥~Buffyverse_Lover16~♥☆

PhoenixRising

OMG, that was your signature?

Yeah, that was a mean trick Barney pulled, so he did have that coming.

☆♥~Buffyverse_Lover16~♥☆

PhoenixRising

Well, your sig is so long already I'm surprised you had room.


I need to watch this episode again because there's so much I don't remember.