Fan Forum
Remember Me?
Register

  New Forum Poll   |     Request a Forum   |     View New Forums

 
 
Thread Tools
Old 02-21-2009, 08:20 PM
  #1
Master Fan

 
chasin' the wind's Avatar
 
Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 24,375
Proud of the House We Built [Original; PG13]


I thought I'd start myself a thread. This story isn't finished or probably anywhere near finished. But I'm working on it!

Here's what I think will be the beginning.

Quote:
Michael awoke that Monday morning at his usual early time, just before the sun rose. He slowly got out of bed while being very careful not to wake his wife. His feet hit the floor, and he stumbled over to the bathroom in the dark, almost tripping over the pair of shoes that Jane hadn’t had the time to put away the night before. Once he was safely behind the bathroom door, he turned on the light and sighed as he looked at himself in the mirror. He grabbed his comb off of the sink and began to comb through his white hair.

It was somewhat of a curse to wake up so early, but Michael had been sticking to the same routine for as long as he could remember. It was especially hard when he had late nights like the one he had just experienced. He laid the comb back down and smiled to himself, the lines on his long face becoming more pronounced. Just remembering the way that the moonlight had glowed on her creamy white skin was enough to make him feel all warm inside. His mouth opened, and he let out a big yawn as he stepped back into the bedroom and headed over to his chest of drawers.

He slipped into his most comfortable pair of jeans and pulled an every day tee shirt over his head. After grabbing his John Deere ball cap from one of the bed posts and his tennis shoes from under the bed, he scooted out of the bedroom and into their dining room which doubled as a sitting area. He went over to his easy chair and looked out the bay windows while he laced up his shoes.

The morning fog was beginning to break up around their house, and Michael could make out the outline of their border collie, Muffin, laying in her doghouse. He grabbed her leash from next to the back door and went out to take her for her morning walk. Muffin began to wag her tail when she saw him walk across the patio and head over to her. He attached the leash to her collar, and the two of them began to head down the gravel driveway that spiraled down the hill that their house was located atop.

Sounds of branches falling in the woods surrounded them as they made their way to the bottom. When they reached the bottom of the hill, the driveway came to a fork. Turning right would have taken them along the path to the barn, so instead they turned left and headed out toward the road. On their way to the end of the driveway, they passed by an old white house where his mother-in-law currently resided, the house that he’d grown up in a number of years ago. After his siblings had moved out and his parents had passed away, they had offered the house to Mrs. Harbison at his wife’s insistence.

The sun was peaking over the edge of the mountains as Michael and Muffin continued down the fence-lined driveway. It was about a five minute walk from the house to the mailbox, but it was good exercise for him. And he needed as much exercise as he could get now that he was no longer a young man. A cool breeze from a passing car whipped around them as reached the road and went over to the mailbox.

Michael kept Muffin’s leash wrapped tightly around his hand so that she couldn’t run out into the middle of the two-lane road. Sanderson Drive had become more heavily traveled with each year that passed. He could still remember when the only people that traveled the road where the people that lived on it. But as time had rolled on, the county had built a public elementary school on the road, and things were never quite the same.

Muffin tugged on her leash, and the two of them started back down the driveway. Michael paused for a moment and opened the local newspaper and read the date: June 19, 2010. Not too much happened in the town of Ashbury, and that was one of the things that made it such a nice place to live. There wasn’t a high crime rate, and people still knew how to be good neighbors.

Michael then continued to head down the driveway and when he reached Mrs. Harbison’s house, he went over to her back door. After seeing that her light was on, he tied Muffin up at the well house and went over and knocked on the screen door.

Still wearing her nightgown, Mrs. Harbison opened the door and mumbled, “Oh, it’s you.”

Michael smiled as he stepped into her kitchen and replied, “It’s nice to see you, too, Hazel.” He set her mail down on the counter and went over to her at the stove. “Something smells good.”

“Just what exactly do I have the pleasure of seeing you for this morning?”

“Well, I was just passing by and thought I’d step in to see how you were. And you are looking lovely this morning.”

“Oh, hush up,” she quickly retorted.

Michael went back over to the door and bade her goodbye. As he was going back up the driveway with Muffin, he passed by a rose bush that had one beautiful bloom on it. He went over and gently removed the flower with his hand and carried up to the house. He tied Muffin up at her doghouse and went inside to see if Jane was awake yet.

He opened the door gently and saw her still sleeping peacefully. He smiled and went over and laid the rose down on his pillow so that she would be sure to see it when she awoke. On his way back into the dining room, something caught his eye, a white dress hanging by Jane’s dresser. As he went over and sat down in the chair by the windows, his mind drifted back to a number of years ago when he’d seen her in another similar dress.
Please tell me what you think!
__________________
i love you more than jazz, baby doll
icon credit

Last edited by chasin' the wind; 02-27-2009 at 04:35 PM
chasin' the wind is offline  
Old 02-21-2009, 09:22 PM
  #2
Master Fan

 
blonde bombshell's Avatar
 
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 20,190
great job

I really like your use of description so far, and although I don't quite know the summary or storyline, it looks like it will be something good.
__________________
{MICHAELA}
blonde bombshell is offline  
Old 02-21-2009, 10:17 PM
  #3
Master Fan

 
follow the sun's Avatar
 
Joined: Sep 2007
Posts: 13,897
I'm glad you opened a thread for this story, Rebecca I added your thread to the board guide


Now I have a place to pester for updates


I like the title you chose for the story, too
__________________
I black my eyes and I black my hair so boys and girls will both stop and stare - Adam Lambert

Last edited by follow the sun; 02-21-2009 at 10:24 PM
follow the sun is offline  
Old 02-22-2009, 02:29 AM
  #4
Ultimate Fan

 
preenad's Avatar
 
Joined: Mar 2008
Posts: 8,849
great
__________________
"There are eighty-two letters in here... and there all addressed to you!"
May 7th 2009 first time seeing Taylor in concert.
Avie by me
whereifalliswhereiland.tumblr.com
twitter.com/pdivecha93
preenad is offline  
Old 02-22-2009, 06:30 PM
  #5
Master Fan

 
chasin' the wind's Avatar
 
Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 24,375
Quote:
Originally Posted by blonde bombshell (View Post)
great job

I really like your use of description so far, and although I don't quite know the summary or storyline, it looks like it will be something good.
Thanks so much. I've been trying really hard not to over-describe, so please let me know if I ever cross the boundary line.

Quote:
Originally Posted by follow the sun (View Post)
I'm glad you opened a thread for this story, Rebecca I added your thread to the board guide
Awww... thanks. You really didn't have to do that, though.

Quote:
Originally Posted by follow the sun (View Post)
Now I have a place to pester for updates
hahahaha... Yes. Now there's more pressure.

Quote:
Originally Posted by follow the sun (View Post)
I like the title you chose for the story, too
Thanks. I really thought my story related to the song, so I used it.
__________________
i love you more than jazz, baby doll
icon credit
chasin' the wind is offline  
Old 02-22-2009, 11:05 PM
  #6
Master Fan

 
follow the sun's Avatar
 
Joined: Sep 2007
Posts: 13,897
What song?
__________________
I black my eyes and I black my hair so boys and girls will both stop and stare - Adam Lambert
follow the sun is offline  
Old 02-23-2009, 06:20 AM
  #7
Master Fan

 
chasin' the wind's Avatar
 
Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 24,375
Well, I'm glad you think it's appropriate anyway.

Proud of the House We Built Lyrics
__________________
i love you more than jazz, baby doll
icon credit
chasin' the wind is offline  
Old 02-23-2009, 06:06 PM
  #8
Master Fan

 
follow the sun's Avatar
 
Joined: Sep 2007
Posts: 13,897
I thought the title sounded good for the fic, but it's even better knowing the song now
__________________
I black my eyes and I black my hair so boys and girls will both stop and stare - Adam Lambert
follow the sun is offline  
Old 02-23-2009, 06:20 PM
  #9
Master Fan

 
blonde bombshell's Avatar
 
Joined: Nov 2006
Posts: 20,190
I didn't know it was a song either
__________________
{MICHAELA}
blonde bombshell is offline  
Old 02-23-2009, 07:15 PM
  #10
Master Fan

 
chasin' the wind's Avatar
 
Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 24,375
Quote:
Originally Posted by follow the sun (View Post)
I thought the title sounded good for the fic, but it's even better knowing the song now
Thanks.
__________________
i love you more than jazz, baby doll
icon credit
chasin' the wind is offline  
Old 02-23-2009, 07:32 PM
  #11
Master Fan

 
chasin' the wind's Avatar
 
Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 24,375
Here's some more. I'm a little worried that I threw a flashback in there too quick.

Quote:
Summer of 1969

It was only a few days after school had let out, and Michael had been punching long shifts at the Emerson Drive Market, a gas station along the main road. There was always more business in town when the kids were out and about. It had been a few years since Michael had graduated, and he somewhat missed the freedom that he once had.

When the clock hit about 4 o’clock, he wasn’t a bit surprised when a young brunette stepped inside. It seemed that she had been stopping by more and more lately, and she was most definitely catching Michael’s eye. It was Jane Harbison from just up the street. Her family had moved to Ashbury a number of years ago, and she certainly had grown up over that time.

Michael was just a Junior in high school when he first laid eyes on her, a young girl with baggy and worn-out clothes. He saw her through her high school years where she slowly began to morph into the woman that he saw before him today. She was wearing a white summer dress that fell at about her knees and showed off her womanly figure. Michael felt almost awkward staring at her as she had just been a girl some years ago.

Jane went to the back of the store and grabbed a Dr. Pepper from the cooler. After ducking out of Michael’s eye sight, she leaned up against another cooler and sighed. “Why does he have to be so irresistible?” she wondered to herself. She had barely spoken to him before, but there was just something about him. Just the way he smiled made her feel warm all over.

She took a deep breath and headed up to the counter. Luckily, Michael had turned to look out the window, and she could gaze at him all she wanted. He was definitely the most attractive man she had ever laid her eyes on. His dark brown hair was always slicked back with gel, and he had that long face and strong jaw line. He was tall, like a man should be, and had those muscles that showed through the tight shirt he was wearing.

He quickly turned around just as she approached the counter. A smile broke out across her face just at the sight of that large nose, and she had to hide her face. It wasn’t like it was out of proportion with his face, but it was definitely very pronounced. One of the few friends she had once informed her that the size of a man’s nose could be compared to other parts of his body, and Jane blushed every time she thought about it.

“That’ll be twenty-one cents,” he told her and then turned back around to look out the window.

While he stared out the window, he had a thought. She seemed like a really nice girl, but he didn’t know her too well because she always seemed so shy, and he didn’t want to frighten her. But with how she looked today, he just couldn’t let her walk away. She didn’t make eye contact with Michael while she searched in her purse for the appropriate change. She laid it down on the counter and was heading back toward the door when she heard a voice behind her. Michael had quickly turned and said, “Hey! Wait a minute.”

He came out around the counter and said, “Don’t worry about it. There’s a special running today for pretty ladies like yourself.”

Jane turned around and looked at him, slightly confused. She checked behind her to make sure that he was, in fact, talking to her.

He held out his hand and offered her the change back saying, “Yes, I’m talking to you.

Jane smiled sheepishly as she looked up at him. She took the change, letting her hand linger on his for as long as possible without it being noticeable.

“It’s Jane right?” he asked, letting go of her hand. When he saw the perplexed look on her face, he added, “You’ve been in here before. I guess I could say that you’re somewhat of a regular.”

Jane knew that she had to be dreaming. How else could he notice her when those beautiful blondes were sitting right outside the window? She didn’t know exactly what to say or if she should say anything at all.

Michael untied his apron and hung it back behind the counter. He came back over to her and smiled. He couldn’t help but notice that she looked absolutely adorable when she was embarrassed.

“I was planning on taking a break,” he told her. “Would you like to go outside and sit with me?”

After a few moments of hesitation, she finally replied, “Th-That would be nice.”

Michael went back to the back of the store and grabbed himself a drink, then the two of them headed outside to sit at one of the picnic tables. The sun was shining brightly, making Jane’s skin simply glow.

“So, what’s it like being a high school graduate?” he asked her as he helped her sit down on one of the benches.

After getting situated and finishing a swallow of her drink, she replied, “Umm… Well, it’s different.”

Michael noticed that she suddenly looked uncomfortable, and he realized how stupid it was of his to bring up the topic of age the first thing. She, too, had obviously realized the difference between them. It wasn’t like six years was that big of a deal, but it was certainly enough to get him in trouble with parents. Nobody wants anything bad to happen to their baby girl.

He was about to change the subject when one of the blondes from the other table approached theirs. It was wonderful timing because Michael really needed to be reminded of the type of girl he used to date.

“Hi, Michael,” she said in a flirtatious voice.

“Twyla,” he said, his mouth disgusted to be saying her name again.

Jane glanced over at him and then slunk down in her seat. She knew that Michael and Twyla had once been a hot couple, and she was nothing when compared to her. She just wanted to leave, but she didn’t want to appear rude.

“Well, it looks like your standards certainly dropped after you broke up with me,” she commented, leaning over the table and showing off her low-cut shirt.

“Just when I thought my standards couldn’t get any lower, I went and dated you,” Michael retorted.

Twyla looked somewhat hurt, but she knew that he couldn’t be serious. She knew that he still had feelings for her, and she just had to find the right spot to hit.

“You know, Michael…” she began.

“Twyla, I happen to be in a relationship right now,” he informed her. “So maybe it would just be best if you left.”

Twyla’s jaw dropped as she glared across the table at Jane. “Oh, come on. You can’t seriously be dating this… this… girl.”

“Well, I am,” he said, standing up and going over to Jane. “And she’s more of a woman than you’ll ever be.”

Twyla had had enough so she finally began to walk away. But she stopped quickly and turned back to Michael, saying, “Well, anytime you want to be with a real woman, you know my door’s always open.” With that, she turned and strutted away, her nose high in the air.

Michael placed his hands down on Jane’s shoulders and apologized, “I’m sorry about the relationship thing. I know it isn’t true, but I had to say something to make her go away.”

Jane glanced up at Michael and took a sip of her Dr. Pepper. She hated being around girls like that because she always compared herself to them. She knew that she wasn’t the most beautiful of girls, and she certainly didn’t have the assets that most men were looking for.

“And I apologize for what she said,” he continued. “Twyla was always big-headed.” There was a brief pause before he added, “You didn’t deserve those comments. You’re much… prettier than she gives you credit for.

Jane swallowed harshly when she heard those words leave his mouth. Sure, he had to have some interest in her to have asked her to sit with him but he couldn’t possibly think that she was attractive. She was about to say something when she was interrupted.

“I’d better be going back in,” Michael said, removing his hands from her shoulders. “I wouldn’t want to lose the only job I’ve ever had.”

He chuckled softly as he extended a hand to help her up. Hesitantly, she took it and found her hand lingering in his. She had never had a boyfriend before, and the only hand she had ever held had been her father’s. Michael walked back over to the front door with Jane’s hand still locked in his grasp.

He stopped and used one hand to brush a lock of curls over her shoulder and said, “I’d really like to see you again. If you feel the same way…” Jane felt a shiver run down her spine as he whispered in her ear. “Well, you know where I am most of the time.”

He let go of her hand and went back inside the store, hoping that she would stop by and see him another day. He was ready for a new type of woman, and Jane was exactly what he was looking for.



The sound of Jane’s soft snore coming from the other bedroom brought Michael back to present day, and he began flipping through the newspaper. He never thought that the two of them would’ve come this far together, but he was so glad that they had. He wasn’t real sure of the kind of person he’d be today if he hadn’t been married to her.
__________________
i love you more than jazz, baby doll
icon credit
chasin' the wind is offline  
Old 02-25-2009, 06:17 PM
  #12
Master Fan

 
follow the sun's Avatar
 
Joined: Sep 2007
Posts: 13,897
fantastic, Rebecca! I could really picture everything that was happening between Michael and Jane So that's Twyla, huh. Sounds like he got a good upgrade

It's cool to see them young and new before all the history between them.
__________________
I black my eyes and I black my hair so boys and girls will both stop and stare - Adam Lambert

Last edited by follow the sun; 02-25-2009 at 08:43 PM
follow the sun is offline  
Old 02-26-2009, 05:33 AM
  #13
Master Fan

 
chasin' the wind's Avatar
 
Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 24,375
Well, I'm glad you liked it.
__________________
i love you more than jazz, baby doll
icon credit
chasin' the wind is offline  
Old 02-27-2009, 04:36 PM
  #14
Master Fan

 
chasin' the wind's Avatar
 
Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 24,375
Added some art to the OP, and hope to be updating soon.
__________________
i love you more than jazz, baby doll
icon credit
chasin' the wind is offline  
Old 03-06-2009, 08:55 PM
  #15
Master Fan

 
chasin' the wind's Avatar
 
Joined: Mar 2006
Posts: 24,375
Sorry it took me so long to update... It's not much, but it's something.

Quote:
Back in their bedroom, Jane was awoken when the sun cast a beam of light through the curtains that fell right across her eyes. She stirred and turned over onto her side, hoping to see her husband lying next to her. Like every other morning, he had already gotten up, but this morning there was something very special left in his place. She brought her nose to the petals of the rose and smiled as she breathed in the pleasant aroma. After gathering up the flower in her hand, she got out of bed and headed into the dining room. When she saw Michael sitting in his chair, she went over to him and kissed him softly on the temple.

Putting down the paper, he smiled and said, “Good morning.”

She smiled down at him warmly and then glanced out the windows.

“Come here,” he told her, putting down the paper and motioning for her to sit on his lap.

She looked at him flirtatiously and sat down. He smiled his signature and slowly brought his lips to hers. Jane leaned forward and kissed him back very passionately. He welcomed the act by placing his hands gently on her back and pulling her closer to him. She slowly pulled away and smiled at her husband. After getting up off of his lap, she headed into the kitchen and asked, “What would you like for breakfast?”

Michael got up and followed her over to the sink and then inquired, “I was so good that I deserve a hot breakfast?”
I'll probably have a lot of inspiration after tomorrow because a Ted/Mary movie is coming on.
__________________
i love you more than jazz, baby doll
icon credit
chasin' the wind is offline  
 

Bookmarks


Thread Tools



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 10:56 PM.

Fan Forum  |  Contact Us  |  Fan Forum on Twitter  |  Fan Forum on Facebook  |  Archive  |  Top

Powered by vBulletin, Copyright © 2000-2020.

Copyright © 1998-2020, Fan Forum.


TEST