[Ron_Beckett]

Too fragmented. Take these sentences for example:

"We were having a race. I was winning but he always let me.

~*~*~

I finished running when we got to the cliff edge. I sat down by the edge.

There was just too much fragmenting and too much first person narrative."

But then I'm real picky when it comes to my fanfiction stories and the ones I read.

[x♥xBeautiful_Butterflyx♥x]

There is nothing wrong with that...

[~AnastasiaGrey~]

Originally Posted by Ron_Beckett (View Post) Too fragmented. Take these sentences for example: "We were having a race. I was winning but he always let me. ~*~*~ I finished running when we got to the cliff edge. I sat down by the edge. There was just too much fragmenting and too much first person narrative." But then I'm real picky when it comes to my fanfiction stories and the ones I read.

Oh wow really?

[dracarys]

Originally Posted by x♥xBeautiful_Butterflyx♥x (View Post) There is nothing wrong with that...

Definitely not, some writers should consider having a beta before publishing their works on a website

[~AnastasiaGrey~]

Originally Posted by blank space (View Post) Definitely not, some writers should consider having a beta before publishing their works on a website

yeah it would help

[x♥xBeautiful_Butterflyx♥x]

Originally Posted by blank space (View Post) Definitely not, some writers should consider having a beta before publishing their works on a website

Exactly...

[Ron_Beckett]

I agree

Man I'm really in the mood to write my Twilight/Fosters crossover. I stopped for a while on it because of my job but lately I've been thinking about it.

I miss that story and I had such a good place where I was going with it too. Those ideas are still in my mind.

[~AnastasiaGrey~]

Originally Posted by Ron_Beckett (View Post) I agree Man I'm really in the mood to write my Twilight/Fosters crossover. I stopped for a while on it because of my job but lately I've been thinking about it. I miss that story and I had such a good place where I was going with it too. Those ideas are still in my mind.

I am sure you will get back to it eventually

[dracarys]

^ I agree with you Tee, once you get the time I'm sure the story will flow back to you.

[Ron_Beckett]

The thing is I had some new chapters written up on sheets of paper and now while I've found some of them I can't find this chapter I'm desperately needing.

I might have to re-write that one from scratch

ETA-

OMG I just found the missing pages! I won't have to do a re-write after all! If anything I'll probably do some editing along the way

[x♥xBeautiful_Butterflyx♥x]

Originally Posted by blank space (View Post) ^ I agree with you Tee, once you get the time I'm sure the story will flow back to you.

[~AnastasiaGrey~]

Originally Posted by Ron_Beckett (View Post) The thing is I had some new chapters written up on sheets of paper and now while I've found some of them I can't find this chapter I'm desperately needing. I might have to re-write that one from scratch ETA- OMG I just found the missing pages! I won't have to do a re-write after all! If anything I'll probably do some editing along the way

thanks Ron

[x♥xBeautiful_Butterflyx♥x]

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/7179931/1/Dear-Maggie

[~AnastasiaGrey~]

Thanks

[x♥xBeautiful_Butterflyx♥x]

Your welcome...