Full disclosure, I don't really consider myself a Bemmett shipper because while I like both characters and don't have anything against the relationship, I am mostly interested in the family dynamics on this show.
That said, I think both Bay and Emmett made mistakes, multiple mistakes, in this relationship. I also think that's pretty realistic. They're 20 years old, trying to figure out their paths in life. (I'm not saying it's not possible to have your life figured out at 20, but the majority don't.) Bay's life since high school has been nothing like she expected. She's now got a criminal record, been through a sexual trauma that was made public, and watched her art career dreams fade away. I know this because the show has made a point of making sure I know this. Bay's conflicts are shown onscreen. I don't have to imagine her psychology too much, the show features it.
Emmett's story is shown in the way in which it relates to Bay. I see his conflicts when he is with Bay, but I don't see them nearly as often when he's not with her. We saw some of what was going on with him California, but none of it was very favorable to his character. If it want to know why he did what he did (personality changes, getting closer to Skye, being a jerk to Travis, and eventually ending things with Bay), I have to use my imagination a bit. I have to think about his inner conflict, how he was feeling about everything that happened. Now he is depressed, but I didn't see the progression toward that, it's just suddenly happening. The show tells me that his career is not working out and he has regrets about letting Bay go, but it does not show me his turmoil the way it shows me Bay's. The general audience doesn't analyze the characters the way that fandoms do and I think maybe that is why there is this general feeling that Emmett is more to blame than Bay. These 2 characters are not equally featured. I've seen this happen on other shows too, so it's something I've been thinking about recently.
Anyway this is just my opinion, please don't yell at me.
