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With Zoe I think her only problem would have been her mom. I´m pretty sure that she would have been comfortable enough with Grace to let her friends soon know they´re together. Maybe she would have started casually using the label with the time or not cared to use it at all but a big 'I´m gay' moment I´d only have seen with her mom and even that could a have also been an 'I'm with Grace' moment as well.
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Considering her friends back then were essentially just Tristan, I agree. But with Zoe, I could see a case where she believes that she'll be fine letting the world know she likes girls and that she has a girlfriend only to realize that maybe she's not completely comfortable just yet. Ex: holding hands in public. Again, because the girl was Grace and Zoe believed she reciprocated, everything was easier. But at the time, their almost relationship was mostly a secret. Even now Tristan is the only one who knew about them and it's unconfirmed whether or not he knows they slept together. Regardless, the fact that Zoe had the moment at all leads me to believe she needed to say those words because it meant accepting herself and finally telling someone. Because Zoe and Grace never got together, Zoe used Winston and so he was the one she came out to instead. Hopefully we'll see the big moment between Zoe and her mother next season.