moyrani

Ok, so I've started writing my own report. I did not use Monique's. Maybe the extra dialogue will help to make y'all feel better about it?
Update - Report is now complete.
Enjoy.

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Scene 1: L/S/R at the cafeteria


Raj: Last night, I did a chat date with Lucy. I was staring into her beautiful eyes for 20 minutes.
Leonard: Aww, that sounds romantic.
Raj: It was, until I realized that the screen had frozen. Still, it was our best date yet.
Leonard: It sounds like it is going well. When are we going to meet her?
Raj: I don’t know. She gets a little anxious around people.
Sheldon: I used to be uncomfortable around people. You know what worked for me? I picture people as Star Trek characters. For example, Leonard was the unnamed klingon in a red shirt.
Howard comes in. He says that he has great news. Stephen Hawking’s team is conducting tests hydrodynamic simulations in a black hole in the North Sea. Their experimental physicist dropped out from their team. Howard recommended Leonard and says Hawking knows L’s research. Leonard gets excited and asks when he would start. Howard says in 2 weeks. Leonard says that is awfully fast. Howard says, “Come on, this is Stephen Hawking. What else do you have to do that could be more important than that?”
Sheldon: He has to drive me to and from work every day (In the second take, he said Leonard has to cater to his every whim).
Raj (to Sheldon): This is a great opportunity. Don’t discourage him.
Sheldon: Nobody asked you, Uhura. (turns to Leonard) Are you sure that a no-name character in a red shirt would be able to handle this? (he looks at Leonard inquisitively).


Scene 2: L/S in car – this was recreated for the audience
Sheldon: You want to hear an interesting factoid? Most drowning accidents related to vehicular transportation happen on boats.
Leonard: Interesting that you would bring this up now that I’ve been offered a job on a ship.
Sheldon: That’s why it is called an interesting factoid.
Leonard: Come on, Sheldon. I know you don’t want to be alone but I won’t pass up this kind of opportunity if it pans out.
Sheldon: Let’s play another game. Who would win a fight between you and, say, a shark?
Leonard: While I appreciate your brand of concern and selfishness, I am going anyway.
Sheldon: Your relationship with Penny has been going incredible. I hope that four months apart don’t screw things up.
Leonard stares at him intensely for a minute like he had not thought about that yet and Sheldon got him.
Sheldon says, “I should have opened up with that”, looking away triumphantly.


Scene 3: R/L at his Apartment.
Lucy is looking through a telescope.
Raj: If you look closely at Venus, you can see the International Space Station passing by.
Lucy: Wow. Your friend was there?
Raj: He brought me a t-shirt that says, My friend worked in the International Space Station and all I got was this lousy t-shirt.
Lucy: Did he take the t-shirt with him to space and back?
Raj: No. That’s what makes it lousy as advertised. (walks away to pour himself another drink) Listen, my friends have been asking to meet you. What do you think?
Lucy: (walks away from the telescope) Oh, I don’t know. How many friends do you have?
Raj: Well, let me think… Six. Wow, I have six friends! That’s so cool. Kind of like Sinatra.
Lucy feels like six is too many to meet at the same time and Raj suggests to “dip her toe” by meeting one at first. Lucy asks if he will be there. Raj says yes, of course. Lucy freaks out and says that makes it two people at the same time, this is happening too fast.

Scene 4: L/P at Penny’s apartment.
They sit down for dinner.
Penny: I spilled a whole tray of drinks on me today at work.
Leonard: Aww, that’s awful.
Penny: Not really. My shirt was soaking wet and I got the biggest tip of my life.
Leonard: So… remember when I told you about the similarities between relativity equations and hydrodynamics in a black hole resulting in radiation in large bodies of water?
Penny: I thought I told you about that.
Leonard smiles in acknowledgment of her joke. “Anyway, Stephen Hawking’s team is researching it and one of his physicist dropped out. Howard recommended me for the job.” He tells her that it is a 4-month expedition.
Penny is impressed and congratulates him. She asks when he leaves. He says in 2 weeks. She is a bit taken aback but tells him it will be ok; she will visit him. He says that’s the thing, he will be on a ship in the middle of the North Sea.
Penny: Wait, aren’t they afraid that he’s just going to roll overboard?
Leonard explains that Hawking won’t be there. He’s sending a team to test his theories.
Penny: So he’s letting people do all his work while he’s sitting around elsewhere? (this line was removed from subsequent takes)
She sighs and says that this is a great opportunity and “I say that based on how much I didn’t understand what you said before” (about the equations), so she still supports him and says they can always talk on the phone. He says things have been going great between them and he’s worried that being away would screw things up.
Penny: Sweetie, there’s more of a chance of you screwing things up when you’re here than if you are away.
He nods in agreement, then asks her a favor. He’s worried about Sheldon, could Penny take care of him? Penny says sure but do you remember what happened when I took care of your goldfish?
Leonard smiles and says she can always flush him (Sheldon) down the toilet and get Leonard “a new one”.


Scene 5: The gang sans Raj at L/S apartment.


They’re all eating in the living room.
Leonard is bringing some water bottles from the fridge and says that it is very nice for them to throw a go away party for him but it is not necessary. Sheldon tells him to stop being selfish. They will need the party for closure when Leonard’s body is found with his face eaten by fish. Penny tells Sheldon to shut up.
Bernadette says, “You know what helped us to deal with Howard going into space? Getting married.”
Penny and Leonard stare at her. There’s an awkward pause and then Penny says, “Shut up, Bernadette”
Raj walks in. Amy tells him hi. Raj whispers something into Howard’s ear. Howard says, “Hello to you, Amy” in an Indian accent. Raj whispers something into Howard’s ear again. Howard says that he’s not going to pass up the opportunity to speak in an Indian accent. Raj walks towards the kitchen to get a beer.
When he gets back, beer in hand, he says that he has a request.
Amy says, “See, now he can talk! I would love to slice his brain open to see what’s going on in there.”
In the first take, Raj says “Charming”. In the second take, he says that if she looks now she would find sadness. Then he says that he wants to introduce Lucy to them but since she has social anxiety, he’d like to start with one person. Sheldon assumes that that person should be him but he’s too busy.
Raj says that he was actually going to ask Leonard. Leonard is honored and says he would love to.
Howard: What the hell? I thought I was your best friend.
Raj says that he felt that Howard’s brightly colored wardrobe, big personality and Woody Allen swagger might be too much for Lucy. Howard is appeased.
Penny suggests that maybe it would be better if Lucy meets a girl first.
Raj agrees and asks Bernadette if she could meet Lucy. Penny says, “What the hell?” and Raj mollifies her by saying that she’s too pretty and that might be scary for Lucy.
Bernadette gets angry. “Are you saying I am not pretty enough to intimidate her?”
Howard pats B’s knee. “Calm down, sweetheart. You are very scary”.
Amy puts down her plate and says, “It should be me”
Raj doesn’t want Amy to meet Lucy because she keeps joking about slicing up his brain to see what’s going on in there.
Amy says: “A- It was not a joke. It was a formal request, and B- I was the outsider in this group but you took me in and treated me like family”.
Everyone is touched but silent, until Sheldon says again begrudgingly, ‘Alright, I will meet her!”.


Scene 6: R/L/A at Raj’s apartment.


A/L are sitting at the dinner table talking while Raj is serving food.
Amy: So after I started dating Sheldon, he introduced me to Leonard and everybody else, and now we are like family.
In the first take, Raj ask Amy to let Lucy have a word in edgewise and Amy says that Lucy doesn’t feel like she cannot talk, which leads to the next interchange. In subsequent takes, Amy just tells Lucy that maybe they could all meet next week.
Raj: (to Lucy) You don’t have to answer that. (to Amy) Don’t put her on the spot. She doesn’t like being put on the spot. (to Lucy) Tell her that you don’t like being put on the spot, Lucy. Tell her!
Lucy just sits there with her eyes bugging out.
Amy tell Lucy not to worry because Raj doesn’t seem to remember that she understands Lucy’s social anxieties.
Raj shushes Amy and tells her that you don’t tell a socially anxious person about their social anxieties. It makes them even more socially anxious!
Amy tells Raj that as a neurobiologist she knows perfectly well what is wrong in his girlfriend’s brain!
Raj freaks out and tells Amy to not call Lucy his girlfriend. They haven’t discussed that yet. *pause* He sits down. “But now that is out in the open, are we boyfriend and girlfriend? Before you answer that, please remember that if you say no, I will be the most unhappy man in the world”.
Lucy freaks out and says that she needs to go to the bathroom. She practically bolts out of there. Raj and Amy look after her and after a few seconds, Raj says that they might as well get started with dinner because she’s not coming out anytime soon.


Scene 7 – P/S at the grocery store.


Penny is pushing a shopping cart and Sheldon is walking beside her.
Sheldon: I don’t know why we are shopping for Leonard’s go away party at a grocery store. They don’t even have a party section!
As he says that, they pull up next to the alcohol section. Penny stops and says, “Yeah, they do” and she starts putting bottles of alcohol in their cart.
Sheldon: I don’t understand why you of all people are encouraging Leonard to leave.
Penny: It is a great opportunity for him! I am his girlfriend and I support him.
Sheldon: Maybe you don’t know this, but studies suggest that men at sea seek comfort in the arms of other men and their britches.
They talk about the great things Leonard and Hawking’s team will be doing. Sheldon says Hawking is just seeking answers on how the universe works, exists and will end. “Me? I am answering bigger questions”. Penny accuses Sheldon of being jealous.
Sheldon: I am not jealous. I am unhappy that good things are happening to him, not me.
Penny: Ok, let me tell you a story. I had a friend who worked at the Cheesecake factory. She’s an actress.
Sheldon: It was you.
Penny: It’s not me! Anyway, we went together to a toothpaste commercial audition. She got the part. I wanted to rip her fake blond hair out! But you know what I did instead?
Sheldon: You pulled your own fake blond hair out.
Penny: No! I put on my biggest smile and told her, “I am happy for you”. You know why? Because she was my friend.
Sheldon: So you are saying that friends lie so they don’t look petty.
Penny: Yeah
Sheldon: How do I do it?
Penny: Like this: “I am happy for you” (She gives him her best fake smile).
Sheldon: No wonder you didn’t get that toothpaste commercial.
Scene 8: Raj’s apartment. He’s alone video chatting with Lucy. They exchange greetings.
Raj: I wanted to apologize for Amy. She was completely out of line.
Lucy just stares at him and doesn’t move.
Raj: Are you not talking to me or has the screen frozen up again?
Lucy: Amy was not the problem. You were pushing me.
Raj: Ok, you are right. I was pushed too hard and I apologize.
Lucy: Thank you.
Raj: Listen, we are having a going away party for Leonard. Everyone will be there. You should come.
Lucy freaks out. “A party?”
Raj: Don’t worry, all eyes will be on Leonard. If you wear brown and sit on the couch, nobody will ever know you were there.
Lucy hesitates: I don’t know…
Raj: Please? Don’t make me beg. I know how to do it. I am from India.
Lucy, still not convinced: Okay.
Raj: Great! My friends are like family to me. You are going to love them. Unless you don’t like them, in which case they are dead to me.


Scene 9: L/S Apartment.


The whole gang is there and they’re dressed up. Leonard is by the kitchen counter mixing drinks. S/P/A are talking in a group by the hallway. Raj is sitting dejectedly on the couch. Howard is walking around. Bernadette walks up to Leonard and asks: Have you ever spent a long time on a boat before?
Leonard says confidently: Yeah!
Bernie: Do you mean when you got stuck on the Small World ride in Disneyland?
Leonard says dejectedly in a low voice: Yes.
Howard walks up to them. He congratulates Leonard again. Leonard cannot believe that he’s going on this amazing adventure. Not as amazing as going into space, says Howard. Leonard says that it is not a competition. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity. Howard says sorry, he’ll miss Leonard and under his breath says that space beats water.
Action moves to Raj and Amy sitting down next to him. She asks for Lucy. Raj says that Lucy’s running late because “you know woman, taking their time with the hair and the makeup and would you please get off my back!”. He stands up and walks away from the couch, looking at his cellphone.
Sheldon shuts off the music, picks up his glass of milk, and clinks a fork loudly against the glass while asking for everyone’s attention. In the first take, Jim asked for everyone’s attention and then clink the glass, and he said out loud “I did that out of order, didn’t I?” but they kept going as if nothing happened.
In the last take, Sheldon made a comment about the pitch of the clink sound and laughed at his own joke. I didn’t hear the line , but the rest of the audience thought it as funny.
Sheldon says a toast to Leonard, wishing him well on the expedition and that he will be missed. He puts on his best fake smile (something close to the koala face).
Leonard: Thank you. That must have been very hard for you.
Sheldon: Well, I meant it (he seemed to be sincere, but then he turns to Penny and says “And that’s how you get a toothpaste commercial!”)
Howard(to Sheldon): It’s very nice of you to pretend to be happy for Leonard. It must have killed you when I went to space.
Raj’s cellphone rings. It’s a text message. He says, “Oh no”. Bernie asks what happened. Howard takes the cellphone and Raj tells him to read it out loud.
Howard: I am sorry. I will not go to the party. It is all too much for me. I think it best if we don’t see each other again.
Raj is devastated. He storms out of the living room toward the bedroom hall. We hear a door slam, then Sheldon turns to Howard and says that it did not kill him that Howard went to space. MONKEYS GO TO SPACE!


Scene 10: L/P/S in the car.


This scene was recreated for us. J/J/K were still wearing the party clothes but we were told this was the next day and they were wearing different clothes.
They arrive at the airport.
Leonard and Penny say here we are and I’m going to miss you. They look sad. Meanwhile, Sheldon is looking around. He gets increasingly nervous as time goes by because Penny has parked in the “red zone”. The white zone is for load and unload. Penny says the white zone was full and Leonard tells Sheldon to calm down.
Penny asks Leonard if he has his ticket, passport, inhalers. Leonard says yes. Penny: How about the Dramamine? Remember what happened in the Small World ride…
Sheldon tells Leonard to get out, he’s not going to jail for Leonard.
Leonard and Penny talk about calling each other. Sheldon says that a cop has made them, duck!
Leonard tells Penny he has something for her. He hands her a gift wrapped box. Penny asks, “what’s this?”
Sheldon yells, “It’s a heart locket with his picture inside. He bought it on clearance. Go, go, go!”
Penny says I love you to Leonard and he says I love you too. They kiss and then hug like they don’t want to let go. Then Sheldon shouts to the cop who apparently is outside that "they’re just in love with each other, we’re not smuggling drugs!”


Scene 11: Penny in the hallway outside of Raj’s apartment


(Kaley changed into casual clothes and she was wearing a heart necklace that Leonard presumably gave her).
She knocks on the door and calls for Raj. He says “one moment” then opens the door to let her in.
She says that she just dropped Leonard at the airport and wanted to check on him. She left Sheldon in the car with a window cracked open and an activity book that he would probably be done with in a minute. Raj thanks her for being kind. Penny asks him if he’s ok as they sit on the couch. Raj says no. He’s been thinking about it and it really is his fault that he drove Lucy away by pushing her too far. He really likes her so he’s very sad. He misses Lucy already. Penny says she knows how he feels because she already misses Leonard too. Both of their voices are cracking.
Raj says no woman will ever love him. Penny gives him a hug and leans her head on his shoulder. He asks why he is so unlovable. Penny says that’s the booze talking. Raj says that cannot be it because he hasn’t had a drink since last night. Penny lifts her head up and they look at each other as they realized what this means. Penny says, “You are talking to me”. Raj says, “I know… and now I am crying for a totally different reason!”


Scene 12: R/P/A/B at Penny’s apartment


They’re by the kitchen counter. The girls are having a glass of wine while Raj is holding a bottle of water. He keeps rambling on and on about what went wrong and many other things. He’s talking fast and very excitedly. Penny offers him some wine in an attempt to shut him up but he says water is fine and keeps on talking.
Amy (sotto voice to Bernadette): Does he ever shut up?
Raj keeps rambling. They did several takes of this scene. In one take, they had Kunal just read from the script a lot of stuff that didn’t make much sense. They were just recording the audio because the girls were not in character. Then they were shooting so Raj’s back was to the camera and they were capturing the girl’s reactions, like they were looking at each other weird, taking gulps of wine, puffing their cheeks in exasperation, etc.


And that is it for the season, folks!