GobSmacked82

Here is the final piece of that convo, ladies. Enjoy.

Kevin dials Whitney again and she picks up after a couple of rings.
Kevin: What on earth? We had a deal. I’d let you pray, and you would answer my question. But you reneged on your half.
Whitney: OK, I did. But Kevin, I can’t answer that question. It’s way out there, and isn’t this your life and your contentment we’re talking about? What would I have to do with the situation?
Kevin: Well, we are friends, and it helps sometimes to try to see what other people see when they look into your life. Now come on and answer that question.
Whitney: (Sighs heavily) This is unbelievable. Well, OK. Your wedding doesn’t bother me that much.
Kevin: That much? What does that mean, exactly?
Whitney: Well, you could have had a smoother splash down, you know?
Kevin: What do you mean by splash down?
Whitney: The engagement, wedding and honeymoon. That’s the whole phase when your marriage is getting going. I’m coming from a place of experience. Me and B---- just fought so much in that period, now that I look back at it. Either that or our tours and careers kept us apart. So much was going on, with the wedding, the first miscarriage, the baby, and of course the movie. I’ll tell you something, and I don’t want you get your feeling hurt or take this the wrong way, because I had a GREAT TIME making the movie with you.
Kevin: Just spill it. What’s the big reveal?
Whitney: I sort of blamed ‘The Bodyguard’ for some of the tension. I mean the big hoopla surrounding it. The tour, the soundtrack and that SONG that stayed on the airwaves forever. Boooby … and don’t tell ANYONE that I said this. He got jealous of me. I think I should have stuck with that first breakup. Although I would never have had Krissy if the split was permanent.
Kevin: Man, I didn’t know it was going to be so tough on you.
Whitney: And of course, people are really good at math when they want something. Really good at calculating gross box office receipts and soundtrack album proceeds, when they want something from you. But talk about taxes, the producer’s cut and everything that comes after that? No.
Kevin: Man, Whitney. I’ve never heard you talk like this before. Maybe having Krissy when you did was what kept you afloat. And she is a double blessing in that way. Something from God to reward you for all your hard work. Anyway, everybody has troubles sometimes in life. You’ve had yours and learned from them, right?
Whitney: Well, God isn’t finished with me yet. And I’m NOT saying you should have broken up with CB at all. It’s not my place. I just feel that these events that I’m reading about you, I think they reveal a guy who is going through something. I don’t know what it is, I don’t want to speculate and get all in your business, like you do mine.
Kevin: No you definitely don’t poke your nose in where it’s not wanted. You always have something encouraging to say, at any rate.
Whitney: Well, I want to encourage you to look out for number one. That’s you. I didn’t look out for myself, even as I was organizing a romantic wedding with attention paid to every tiny detail. Did I tell you that my dad tried to get MC Hammer to marry me, while I was engaged?
They both laugh, and Whitney tells Kevin about the time John Houston approached MC Hammer with that suggestion after Whitney knocked them dead at the Super bowl.
Whitney: Enough of that serious stuff. I know Scotland was beautiful. You should tell me about it sometime.
Kevin: Yeah, I will. My house is starting to wake up, so I’ll have to get into it when I have more time to lay out the details. I will tell you this, though. If it were you and me on that honeymoon in Scotland, I would have taken out a my huge, big …
Whitney: Oh, NO you are not …
Kevin: Gi-normous … bag of petals from white roses and lilacs, because I know lavender and purple are your favorite colors, and I would throw them at your feet everywhere you went.
Whitney: Now that’s romantic. See, I will not even front and act like that’s not the sweetest thing I’ve heard in YEARS. Sister Whitney knows romance when she hears it.
Kevin: That’s me, and I can’t help it.
Whitney: Well then, you just keep on keeping on, baby. I have to go now, and so do you.
Kevin: Do you want me to send you off with some lyrics from “Brown Sugar?”
Whitney: Oh, no! You are on probation, and can’t even afford to open the doors for ladies anymore without these vultures talking. No racy lyrics.
Kevin: You’re right. But the next time you hear it on the radio, turn it up. Just for the sheer fun of it. Get into it and rock out!
Whitney: Byeee Kevin!

And they hang up gently. Later that morning, the radio is playing in Whitney’s house or wherever she is. “Brown Sugar” comes on, and Whitney covers her face. Then she darts for the kitchen to fix a glass of ice water.

Whitney: Next time I talk to him, I'm gonna tell him how he changed that song for me for the rest of my life.