GobSmacked82

OK ladies. Here is how I think Whitney might have "responded" to KC's interview with People magazine in May 1993 about The Bodyguard.

KC: Hey Whit. Just calling to see if you got the basket for Baby Krissy. There's a Mother's Day gift in it for you, too. Call me.

WH: Yes, Kevin. I got the basket. The mailman delivered it. Along with the latest People magazine. I read what you told the reporter. I read it "all afternoon."

KC: Oh ****. But you know, Whitney, I-I-I don't think you should get all worked up when you've just had a baby. New mothers need -

WH: Don't you try to tell me what new mothers need. I need you to have some self-control and be quiet.

KC: Be quiet about what?

WH: You told People magazine that we did a steamy love scene all afternoon. Do you know what 'we did it' means? It means to bump & grind, to tap that and if we lived in England, it would mean to sh-g. Come on, Kevin. You know what that means.

KC: Not really, I only said we did it from a production standpoint. The reporter took the whole thing out of context. You know People magazine is nothing but a gossip rag.

WH: Kiss my ass, "production standpoint." and the thing is, you had to go and grin about it. It says right here: a satisfied smile. Ugh! Kevin, you nnaasty! This is straight outta high school. You might as well be the quarter back telling everybody you did it with the homecoming queen on prom night. And if they are nothing but a gossip rag, why are you talking to them?

KC: I think I read somewhere that dressing people down stops the breast milk.

WH: You did not read that anywhere!

KC: Whitney, calm down. Your baby needs a serene Mommy.

WH: What my baby needs is for Mr. Kevin to stop bragging that he "did it" with her mother all afternoon. And you know why I'm mad? You did this before with the Leeza Gibbons interview. There you were, running your mouth about how it was all real and passionate. You should have gotten that out of your system.

KC: It needs to be real and passionate. Otherwise it's not believable and the movie tickets won't sell.

WH: I can sell movie tickets. And I don't need people to picture me buck nekked, thrashing around all afternoon to sell tickets.

KC: I know you can sell tickets. You're a lady, you're a sister and guys love you. We pulled those scenes b/c Rachel Marron is not a floozie, who would jump on every man she met, and it just didn't come across right for her to get crazy all night with Frank Farmer on the first date.

WH: (silent)

KC: Besides; I'm not the only one who talked to the press about the sex factor.

WH: Excuse me, what?!! I never said nothing to No-body! You don't know what you're talking about.

KC: I recall an interview that ran in the January issue of Ebony magazine. Someone called her leading man a hunk four times in two paragraphs and threw in a little "sexy" to boot. So if you do the math, four hunks multiplied by one sexy equals four sexy hunks. Therefore, someone should have a little more compassion for her co-star.

WH: That's some bull----!

KC: Look, I said I wouldn't let you fail and you're the hottest woman on screen right now. I knew you could pull this off. Every guy in America wishes he were Frank Farmer right now, because Frank fell in love with a lady, not a ho', I promise you that.

WH: Mm-hmm. You would say anything to get out of trouble. I bet you have a lot of practice. I bet Cindy has to kick your butt very two weeks just to keep you in check. She's a saint.

KC: Pretty much

WH: OK you don't have to go to the doghouse. This time. But I still sent back the bracelet.

KC: What! That was a Mother's day gift.

WH: The basket I'll keep, for the baby. But you have no business sending jewelry to a married woman who ain't even thinking about you.

KC: *sighs* OK Whitney you win. But before I go, congratulations on The baby. She's a beauty and I can tell the two of you are going to be as close as a mother and daughter can be.

WH: Thank you Kevin. That's sweet.

KC: She's a lucky baby. She has a gifted, smart, hard-working, world-class beautiful superstar for a mom who is brimming over with love for her. Really, Whitney, I'm excited for you both.

WH: Dammit Kevin, that's beautiful. Maybe it's the h-hormones, but I think I'm g-gonna cryyy!!!

KC: No don't do that! Everything is so lovely. You have your movie, your album, your mom. But then again, a lot of women go through this with the firstborn. And you're dealing with a lot right now.

WH: You forgot Bobbeeee! (sobs hard)

KC: Yeah, him too.

WH: Did Cindy go through this? Cindy too? (sniffs)

KC: Maybe.

WH: I met her. She's cool. You don't deserve h-huurrr, running your mouth everywhere you go-ohhh!!

KC: You're probably right. OK, Whit, I've kept you on the phone long enough. I'll let your family take you back. But let's talk again. And soon.

WH: OK. (composing herself) OK. But the (hiccup) next time you sit down with a (hiccup) reporter about me, you better not (hiccup) get fresh. Or else Imma feed you a knuckle sandwich. Find you and kick ya ass.

KC: I wouldn't trade a Whitney @SS whippin' for the world.