All of these quotes are hilarious!!! Especially the Happy Gilmore and Vegas Vacation ones
I think my fave would have to be TOMMY BOY!!!
Tommy: I left a message.
Richard: Really, what number did you call?
Tommy: Two, four, niner, five, six, seven...
Richard: I can't hear you, you're trailing off and did I catch a niner in there? Were you calling from a walkie-talkie?
Tommy: It was a cordless.
Tommy: Where are we gonna take the deer?
Richard: I dunno, the vet?
Tommy: You take dead animals to the vet?
Richard: Why not? I'd take you to the vet.
Tommy: Yeah I'll take you to the... Um...
Richard: Got that?
Tommy: Shut up.
Michelle: Listen you little spazoids. I know where you live and I've seen where you sleep. I swear that your mothers will cry when they see what I've done to you.
Richard: No way that just happened. My car is completely destroyed.
Tommy: I've seen some crazy stuff in my time, but that... was... AWESOME. Oh, sorry about your car, man. That... That sucks.
Tommy: Fat guy in a little coat. Fat guy in a little coat
Richard: And, the life vests, these you might need. But what are the chances of us hitting a lake. If my money says anything, it's gonna be a mountain.
Richard: Ok, here is Tommy, he's gonna help me with my little spiel here. Tommy is a Scorpio, he likes biking and he's never been laid.
Richard: Hi, I'm Earth. Have we met?
Stewardess: I don't think so...
Tommy: Forget it, I quit, I can't do this anymore, man. My head's about to explode. My whole life sucks. I don't know where I'm going, what I'm doing. My dad just died, we just killed Bambi, I'm out here getting my ass kicked and every time I drive down the road I wanna jerk the wheel INTO A GODDAMNED BRIDGE EMBUNKMENT.
I could keep going on and on and on, but I will stop